MEN!! First Time Daddy issues?

[MrsGards]

Mine too. He's a brake and accelerate kind of guy and the amount of times I tell him (especially when we are in traffic!) to just drive slower and then he wont need to brake so sharply!

But yeah... its everyone elses fault! Even his best friend said he'll need to calm his driving down when we have the baby otherwise the baby will be sat there like a nodding dog in her carseat!

Plenty of people told him he needs to calm down before we were even pregnant. The godfather we have chosen for our child said to him that he needs to put a doll in the car seat in the back of the car, and see where that doll ends up at the end of the journey, maybe that will shock him

thats a really good idea. Mine isnt too bad as long as hes not stuck in traffic or behind someone doing 15mph in a 60, that kind of thing. then he becomes lewis hamilton and is a knob

 

[knk2011]

Mine too. He's a brake and accelerate kind of guy and the amount of times I tell him (especially when we are in traffic!) to just drive slower and then he wont need to brake so sharply!

But yeah... its everyone elses fault! Even his best friend said he'll need to calm his driving down when we have the baby otherwise the baby will be sat there like a nodding dog in her carseat!

Plenty of people told him he needs to calm down before we were even pregnant. The godfather we have chosen for our child said to him that he needs to put a doll in the car seat in the back of the car, and see where that doll ends up at the end of the journey, maybe that will shock him

thats a really good idea. Mine isnt too bad as long as hes not stuck in traffic or behind someone doing 15mph in a 60, that kind of thing. then he becomes lewis hamilton and is a knob

My OH tends to think the brake pedal is there only for corners and speed cameras

I know that when he goes around a corner he is secretly imagining himself drifting it, or that he's filming a fast and furious movie.

 

[Quailpower]

There is of course, a simple answer to this ladies.

Ive been with OH 7 years,and 2 years ago I put the foot down on the proverbial wallet.

All finances are managed by me, all purchases with my permission. (except of course his lunches, Im not a complete dictator - but he does have a budget for buying food at work)

OH is happy as a lamb. He knows he is useless at money management, and when I have all the finances and bills: all the bills get paid on time, the supermarket shopping gets delivered weekly on budget, and we even have *gasp* Savings *gasp* which means he can occasionally buy nice things that he really wants but could never save up for himself. Such as a brand new Xbox.

However, I do give OH a lot of leeway when purchasing cars as he is a mechanic and knows better that I. Plus he is something of a wheeler deeler and will often come home and give me a wad of cash because "that car I bought for £200 and did £50 quids work on sold for £600" Ive yet to know him loose money on a car so I cant complain as it pays for my holidays.

 

[knk2011]

Unfortunately, my fiancé doesn't come home with wads of cash. He comes home and sits on the Xbox...

 

[chezababy]

I feel for you ladies as my OH use to be the same with cars. Luckily when we moved in together I took over the finances and we only have a joint account now so I can keep an eye on his spending. He's really bad with money and even now I have to question him about his spending, I'm currently trying to tackle the issue of how much he spends a week on lunches at work. But he did just get a tax rebate which I expected to go straight on his pit bikewhich needs repairing but I've been told that it can wait and the money go on more important things. He never would have said that before I got pregnant so I think there is still a chance your OHs could change their ways. I'd just put your foot down as men do sometimes need us to be very persuasive before they understand these things. I may have to use the idea of the doll in the car seat if OH doesn't start to drive a bit more sensibly soon. He's not too bad with me in the car but there is still a lot of quick acceleration and braking which won't be good for baby.

 

[amjon]

My DH wants to buy a mini van and the little stick family for the car. He is so broody and has been wanting these babies.

 

[Jessica604]

There is of course, a simple answer to this ladies.

Ive been with OH 7 years,and 2 years ago I put the foot down on the proverbial wallet.

All finances are managed by me, all purchases with my permission. (except of course his lunches, Im not a complete dictator - but he does have a budget for buying food at work)

OH is happy as a lamb. He knows he is useless at money management, and when I have all the finances and bills: all the bills get paid on time, the supermarket shopping gets delivered weekly on budget, and we even have *gasp* Savings *gasp* which means he can occasionally buy nice things that he really wants but could never save up for himself. Such as a brand new Xbox.

However, I do give OH a lot of leeway when purchasing cars as he is a mechanic and knows better that I. Plus he is something of a wheeler deeler and will often come home and give me a wad of cash because "that car I bought for £200 and did £50 quids work on sold for £600" Ive yet to know him loose money on a car so I cant complain as it pays for my holidays.

Nice job!! We have been on a "cash mostly" budget for almost 2 years now and it is mind blowing the amount of money we have saved! We have been able to pay off our credit cards, go on two vacations and pay for a car we just bought in cash (its a couple years old, we aren't loaded!) we live in an insanely expensive city (vancouver BC) and I am so so proud at our budgeting and my husband really strapping down and becoming responsible with money. This baby even has a tiny little college fund started!

 

[Young1stMom]

My DH wants to buy a mini van and the little stick family for the car. He is so broody and has been wanting these babies.

My DH is big on cars and a year ago he had gotten a new 2011 Hyundai Genesis 2.0T Coupe and then 6 months later we were having a baby. The car was totally impractical for where we live to start, it drifted in the snow and fish tailed none stop. I almost crashed it multiple times and so did he. And then it was never going to fit a car seat. It had the car seat clips but it was never going to work. He decided on his own he would trade it for a new suv since the car was new and we would accept the new debt it would put us in. He picked a really nice sporty suv that we both love, fully loaded. He definitely sulks about his car alot. Everytime he sees a genesis he mopes lol But he said it was the responsible thing to do and im really glad he has been taking things really well. Hes really excited about our baby girl.

Anyway so he told me i was not allowed to put ANY stickers of family or anything on the car (he still wants his last moments of freedom i guess before hes got a family going on haha). And i keep pointing out how cute they look on other cars. So for christmas i asked his mom for a bunch of them and for her not to tell him about them. So i sneak outside one day and stick a man and girl and a lil puppy one on the back of the car, and wait to see how long it takes for him to notice. The next day when hes at work some of his coworkers tell him they didnt know he had a dog. And he asked how they knew and they told him about he family stickers on his car. So apparently he marches outside looks at the back of the suv and calls me. HAHA needless to say...they are still there And i even added a lil baby girl one. tehe

 

[ngozi79]

This is what we do....it may or may not help some of you with OH's with expensive hobbies!!

Firstly, we have a 'joint' account (actually just in my name, where we both pay an equal amount in each month to cover household bills etc. That way, there is shared money, and our own separate money.

OH has two motorbikes, both of which were relatively cheap to buy, but tend to become moneypits in the summer, and around MOT time. (I had one too, but left it for scrap in the south of France just before we TTC... sob!)

I have a car, my responsibility to maintain as OH doesn't currently drive.

When we found out we were pregnant, we started building a spreadsheet of all the things we would need to buy, and the likely cost of each. Once we had taken off the value of all our Christmas vouchers etc, we have an amount of money needed to raise to cover the rest of the initial expenses. That amount is a shared responsibility and OH knows this.

As we get closer to our due date, we will take the outstanding amount needed, and split it. We'll give ourselves a couple months worth of paydays to contribute our equal share.

The rest of OH's money, is his own. He can do what he likes with it, buy beer, bike bits, clothes, beer, more beer.... whatever. Same applies to mine although I'm mostly buying baby stuff just because I want to!

When baby arrives, I will stop work (redundancy probably) and we will be using his salary and some of my SMP to pay bills and exist. Neither of us will have much spare cash so I want to make sure we make the most of the last few months of financial freedom!

As for the driving like a fool..... OH knows that I will hide the keys of his sportsbike if I find out he's riding like an ass...and then he'll be stuck with the boring one. These men need to know that they have responsibilities to you and your baby now, and they are no help at all if they are seriously injured or 6 feet under!

Fingers crossed all of our naughty little boys grow up soon!!
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