Miscarriage no1 after two healthy pregnancies .

[Mummysangel]

Hi ladies ,

Newbie here!, so I already have two healthy children who are now 6&8 years old . We had been ttc since April and found out in August that I was expecting . Such excitement as we really thought with my gynae issues that we would struggle ( this is a different father to my previous children , after a divorce ) .

Anyway I'm pretty certain I Should now be 13 weeks pregnant however early scans due to cramping showed the baby to be much less than I expected , many reassured me that I just just have fell pregnant later , however I know deep down that there is something wrong and that baby is just measuring small .

2nd scan a week ago I saw little ones heart beating and measuring 6weeks 3 days , I felt happy and much more content after seeing that little heart . However 4 days later I started to bleed ( I had already been spotting a little ) , come sat I was bleeding lots and passing clots and the pain was so bad . I phoned the hospital , to very little support and an appointment was mad for me to attend a scan on Monday afternoon . I continued to bleed all wend and suffer awful cramps .

Monday we went for the scan , and regret it was my little bean the little heart beating , just about 😭 So so slow then speeding up a little , my partner just broke down . This is his first baby so it's hard for him . He was so excited . The midwife also pointed out very little fluid around the baby in the sac , which isn't a good sign . I was told it wasn't looking good and that it would be an awfuk few days for us as I go home to " wait " . I am back to the hospital on Thursday morning for another scan and to see where we go from there , a d& c if needed .

We are just devastated , I'm holding up for my partner and kids , but I am exhausted I feel so weak all I can do is sleep and rest , I'm barely eating . And the pains are so bad but I havent noticed anything coming away yet . Surely my baby couldn't still be alive I mean that little heart beat was so so slow !. I'm just stuck in limbo right now , really finding it hard as I lost my mum a few years back and with no other family she was my Rock . I'm just broken but trying to be strong . The physical pain is so much worse that I ever expected ! .

Anyone I know who have had a mc the baby has already been gone on the scan , I just couldn't believe the baby was still alive but dying !! I just found that so much harder to deal with it was so hard to watch , I just want closure now 😭X

 

[Mummysangel]

I forgot to add I am so cold I can't keep warm , my head hurts and I keep feeling like I may pass out , is this normal ?

 

[HelenJane]

I had a scan and everything was ok. I was 14 weeks when i had a miscarriage 3 weeks ago. I had to give birth in hospital and everything.
Its awful what you are going through and neither of you deserve it. I think its definately harder to deal with if you have had a scan
My thoughts are with you.

 

[HelenJane]

PS this was my 1st miscarriage after 2 fine pregnancies and children aswell

 

[Mummysangel]

@helenjane thanks for the reply Hun , sorry for your loss and that awfuk experience 😭 I am sure u are exhausted . On Thursday at my scan my baby was gone , no heartbeat . I was given a tablet to help speed up the miscarriage as I'd already been blessing nearly 2 weeks .by 11pm I was contracting and crying out in agony , I never expected that , I was taken back by the pain ! Essentially labour !! By 11:20 I had passed my little baby so perfect inside the amniotic sac placenta attached !! All so small yet perfectly formed !! The sac the size of a 50p my little lady the size of my ring finger nail!! . So perfect Yet nit meant for this world . Today we buried her in my mums grave , just dug a little hole and popped her in . This was closure I needed and my partner , as he has been distraught . This was his first child as my boys are to my ex husband . Hopefully next year we will try again , if this happened again that's it , I couldn't cope . I am utterly exhausted from all of the physical pain and bleeding and I'm eating very little . How are u feeling after yours ? . I never expected it to be so awful and to be so drained xx

 

[HelenJane]

Oh yes i felt exactly the same. Its definately like labor. Afterward i felt no physical pain and i had bleeding like a heavy period for about 2 weeks.
I did not have much of an appetite for those couple of weeks but i knew i needed to eat so still tried to eat something.
Also i felt so tierd all the time too.
Its really normal how you are feeling.
In a couple of weeks you will begin to feel ok. You will get an appetite back and your engery levels will raise again.

 

[momwithbabies]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a D&C, so I can't comment on the recovery and physical pain. But the emotional pain is worse, by far. I will say that after I felt better physically, the emotional started to improve. It's been almost a year and a half and you never get over it, but it does get easier with time. You don't have to be strong. Part of my problem, and it still is, is that I feel like I have to hold it all together. And you need to grant yourself some days to not have it together. Take care of yourself.

I wish you the best during this time of sadness and healing.