tinkerbelle93
2 little boys :)
- Joined
- May 18, 2011
- Messages
- 4,271
- Reaction score
- 0
So earlier this year it had been a whole 12 months since my OH's proposal to me and, since we'd finally got sorted and settled into our new house, we decided it was time to start thinking about the wedding.
Originally I decided I wanted a typical big white wedding with extended family, all our friends etc. as most people in my family get married that way and I'd never known any different. We set the date for next summer, looked round some venues and found one we wanted and reserved a date on it.
It all seemed very simple but things started becoming more and more complicated, arguments began within the family about who was to be invited and who wasn't to be invited (family feuds, parents and in-laws insisting people one of us has never met to be invited), who was going to be a bridesmaid (I ended up with needing to have 8 bridesmaids to stop anyone being upset or offended) and our guest list just seemed to get longer and longer and longer and the budget just seemed to get bigger and bigger and bigger.
We'd planned a mid-week wedding on a budget using hired suits, second-hand dresses, a student photographer etc. etc. yet it was still going to come to thousands and thousands. I do a university course from home so we live on one income so the price was becoming very demanding from us. We started to have a think about it and decided that actually the big white wedding wasn't the right things for us for the various reasons:-
- Number 1 was finances, we are only young and only bought our first home less than a year ago. Despite the fact we have some savings left the cost of the wedding was going to mean another year of saving each month and going without things just for one day. It would also mean possibly taking out a loan which is something we really don't want to do.
- The big wedding would mean we probably couldn't afford a decent honeymoon. I think I would regret that more.
- We felt as though we just couldn't please anyone with the guests, unless we had like 120 people at the ceremony. I hate the thought of being the centre of attention among that many people and me and my OH also hated the fact that half of the people we would have invited we really weren't closely connected to, or hadn't even met them at all! Plus certain family members we'd felt forced to include have tendencies to get lairy when drinking and cause fights or trouble.
- I hate stress and already have my hands full with a house, toddler and degree, let alone with a huge wedding to plan.
So anyway last week we had a little chat together and also had chats with our parents and came to the conclusion that all we really want is to be married...so we thought we may as well just do it and have an intimate, low-key event instead. We both have our hearts set on this October so it's going to be a bit rushed but it's not as though there is a huge amount of planning to do.
I'm going to my local church tomorrow with my mum to see if they have an October date (any day will do though preferably a Friday if they have one free!) so me and my OH can have a ceremony there with 32 people.. our parents, grandparents, siblings, my sister-in-law and nieces and 4 of our closest friends (and our little boy obviously!). Then after the ceremony we'll just go for a nice meal out together somewhere.. there are a couple of pubs and restaurants I have contacted who have rooms for private dining so we'll most likely go to one of those. Then afterwards me and OH will go off somewhere of our choice for a whole weekend while my parents kindly look after Oliver! We're so excited and can't choose yet. My parents offered to have him for a week but he's too little to be left that long I think.
Anyway what I need to do so far...
- Visit church and book ceremony (tomorrow!)
- Choose venue and book for after ceremony dining (will do after church appointment tomorrow)
- Choose wedding dress (probably second-hand), wedding hair style, make-up and accessories.
- Choose colour theme.
- Choose a suit to hire for groom and choose a suit for Oliver our son and page boy.
- Choose and buy dresses for our 2 flower girls (my 6-year-old niece and OH's 6-year-old sister) and shoes.
- Choose flowers.. basically just a bouquet for me and buttonhole for groom.. perhaps something for the flower girls but not sure.
- Choose rings (me and OH going to look this weekend)
I think those are the main things so far! Very excited!
More planning to come!
Originally I decided I wanted a typical big white wedding with extended family, all our friends etc. as most people in my family get married that way and I'd never known any different. We set the date for next summer, looked round some venues and found one we wanted and reserved a date on it.
It all seemed very simple but things started becoming more and more complicated, arguments began within the family about who was to be invited and who wasn't to be invited (family feuds, parents and in-laws insisting people one of us has never met to be invited), who was going to be a bridesmaid (I ended up with needing to have 8 bridesmaids to stop anyone being upset or offended) and our guest list just seemed to get longer and longer and longer and the budget just seemed to get bigger and bigger and bigger.
We'd planned a mid-week wedding on a budget using hired suits, second-hand dresses, a student photographer etc. etc. yet it was still going to come to thousands and thousands. I do a university course from home so we live on one income so the price was becoming very demanding from us. We started to have a think about it and decided that actually the big white wedding wasn't the right things for us for the various reasons:-
- Number 1 was finances, we are only young and only bought our first home less than a year ago. Despite the fact we have some savings left the cost of the wedding was going to mean another year of saving each month and going without things just for one day. It would also mean possibly taking out a loan which is something we really don't want to do.
- The big wedding would mean we probably couldn't afford a decent honeymoon. I think I would regret that more.
- We felt as though we just couldn't please anyone with the guests, unless we had like 120 people at the ceremony. I hate the thought of being the centre of attention among that many people and me and my OH also hated the fact that half of the people we would have invited we really weren't closely connected to, or hadn't even met them at all! Plus certain family members we'd felt forced to include have tendencies to get lairy when drinking and cause fights or trouble.
- I hate stress and already have my hands full with a house, toddler and degree, let alone with a huge wedding to plan.
So anyway last week we had a little chat together and also had chats with our parents and came to the conclusion that all we really want is to be married...so we thought we may as well just do it and have an intimate, low-key event instead. We both have our hearts set on this October so it's going to be a bit rushed but it's not as though there is a huge amount of planning to do.
I'm going to my local church tomorrow with my mum to see if they have an October date (any day will do though preferably a Friday if they have one free!) so me and my OH can have a ceremony there with 32 people.. our parents, grandparents, siblings, my sister-in-law and nieces and 4 of our closest friends (and our little boy obviously!). Then after the ceremony we'll just go for a nice meal out together somewhere.. there are a couple of pubs and restaurants I have contacted who have rooms for private dining so we'll most likely go to one of those. Then afterwards me and OH will go off somewhere of our choice for a whole weekend while my parents kindly look after Oliver! We're so excited and can't choose yet. My parents offered to have him for a week but he's too little to be left that long I think.
Anyway what I need to do so far...
- Visit church and book ceremony (tomorrow!)
- Choose venue and book for after ceremony dining (will do after church appointment tomorrow)
- Choose wedding dress (probably second-hand), wedding hair style, make-up and accessories.
- Choose colour theme.
- Choose a suit to hire for groom and choose a suit for Oliver our son and page boy.
- Choose and buy dresses for our 2 flower girls (my 6-year-old niece and OH's 6-year-old sister) and shoes.
- Choose flowers.. basically just a bouquet for me and buttonhole for groom.. perhaps something for the flower girls but not sure.
- Choose rings (me and OH going to look this weekend)
I think those are the main things so far! Very excited!
More planning to come!
