Nervous about telling in laws...any advice

[tkeith8109]

Ok so my husband and I are wtt until December and I wanted a little advice for people that are currently going through this. I love my in laws. They are great people and really do so much for us. We already have 2 kids and they adore them plus our nephew. Now my MIL is under the assumption we are done because I have pcos and had my thyroid removed so she thinks I can't really have anymore kids. Well the pcos ended up being mild and my thyroid levels are okay so we have decided that we want another. I am nervous about telling them when it finally does come time because we are just now starting to get our stuff together financially. We are very focused and realized we can actually afford a child we just have to be better with our money. We have goals and a plan and so far we are sticking to them. However, I feel like when we do get pregnant they will be like wtf are you guys thinking?! I want our last baby to feel wanted from the beginning and I want them to be happy about it. We were going to wait a year so we can get everything finished first (paying stuff off and getting a van) but honestly my baby fever is too strong and we decided to go for it. Any advice for us when to tell them? Should we start mentioning that we are really trying to get our financial state in order so they know we are doing okay and really trying, which is what they have wanted? Or should we not worry because they will be happy no matter what? I should also mention we live in a 3 bedroom in a really nice area. We have decent paying jobs and our income will go up substantially in the next year just from the debt that will automatically fall off and credit cards we are paying off, we have 2 cars, they are just too small so we are getting a van next year, and our 2 kids are very well taken care of. We have just decided to stop spending money on things we don't need like eating out. I just don't want people thinking that we can't afford the kids we have so why add. I would really appreciate any advice or similar stories.

 

[Mearly12]

Your in laws will give their opinions no matter what financial state you are in. You do not need to prove to them you are capable of taking care of another baby.

when your pregnant tell them, there is nothing they can say negative once you are already pregnant that won't make them sound rude.

Just have your joy and don't let anyone take that away from you, because once the little one is born, all your in laws will love that baby just as much as your other children.

Good luck ttc

 

[tkeith8109]

Thank you so much. I know that they will probably not say anything, to us anyway, but it is still nerve wracking. Our kids are 4 and 6 now and we were so young it is like we are starting over again. I am just so excited!

 

[Leinzlove]

I AM REAL NERVOUS about announcing and especially the in laws too.

My husband told me today to stop worrying about what anyone thinks. In about 6 months we will have this baby!

 

[crazylilth1ng]

Aww congrats on your decision to have another baby! I hope it happens fast for you At the end of the day, they will come round once it has happened. Like someone said above, tell them.once it has happened, if you say something now they may possibly try to discourage you and cause you unnecessary upset. Once you are pregnant it actually becomes more of a real situation so they will just have to deal with it and eventually will most likely be happy about it.

 

[tkeith8109]

Thanks everyone. We are not telling them before that is for sure. I asked my husband yesterday if he thinks it will be an issue and he said no and if it is its our life and child.

 

[Katy78]

We also decided to try for a third baby. My OH is unemployed, our family of four is living in a two room rented apartment. But we're doing just great. We have no debts, we even have some money saved up.
In a way, we're crazy for wanting one more. But I just know I'll regret it for the rest of my life if we don't even try.
I don't really care what my MIL and my parents will think. I know they'll love their grandchild just as much as they love the ones they already have. I'm sure of it. They'll try to help out too but we're quite self-sufficient and we want to support ourselves. We can afford one more child, we only have to be a bit more careful with our money. Like you said - we started limiting eating out, etc. I have a nice salary and a company apartment and the only difference for us might be that we can't afford a place of our own in a couple of years like we planned.
Don't worry. You'll be just fine and so will your in-laws .

 

[kellyrae]

My girls were 2 and 4 when our third arrived....when we announced it my mil was shocked but quite happy...even happier when she found out he would be a grandson!! I think it was my own mother that was more worried than anyone! I found people weren't as excited for us but that is quite normal and my friends said I was mad!! I let it get to me a little at times but it is your life...its you who will be having a baby, taking care of it and the rest of your family not them so enjoy it 😊
I have yet to announce our 4th yet haha cant wait to see the expressions on their faces this time...should be fun 😂😂😂

 

[tkeith8109]

Thanks for the encouraging words. I know everything will be fine and I honestly just care too much about what others think. I cannot wait until we get pregnant. Good luck to everyones pregnancies. Hopefully I will be joining you guys soon!

 

[Leinzlove]

Thank you!

Kellyray: I'm also announcing #4 and WOW!!! I am nervous. Despite trying not to be.

 

[Tropiclands]

Sounds like you have very well prepared yourself. Just tell them and go from there. You can't make them accept your plan though obviously.

 

[Leinzlove]

I took pics of my ultrasound with my girls and I'm sending them to the inlaws.

YEAH: TOTALLY trying not to go face to face.

 

[Tropiclands]

Well there you go!