Not doing " Father Christmas "

[freckleonear]

I can get the idea of not doing santa and even mentioned it to my husband, but decided to go with it. I can see it form both sides really, but Christmas really has been blown out of all proportion and I do love the sounds of a simple Christmas although I admit I go over board every year and then wish I hadn't.

Steph - there people who identify themselves as Christians who do not celebrate Christmas, Jehovah's Witness' for example and those who fellow the actual date (which we know is y Christmas as that was a pagan tradition) and then those who don't do Christmas as it's done today but follow a simpler christ focus traction without the gift giving, or Christmas trees etc.

However, I'm a Christian who does do the whole Christmas thing with Santa and trees and sleigh bells lol. But I can understand the other side of it too.

Ah ok thanks! My Church was all for christmas too, and at the church school I went to it was fully celebrated!

Yeah mine too, but I guess Christianity covers a massive spectrum of beliefs. When I ran the children programme at my church the kids Christmas party had a Santa come visit.

I'm a member of a reformed evangelical church which does not celebrate Christmas.

 

[freckleonear]

I think it's incredibly mean to deprive your children of the magic of christmas.

And I think that is incredibly rude. You have no idea about my family's cultural or religious background! You wouldn't dream of applying that same statement to other parenting choices (at least I hope not), so why get so riled up over something as trivial as Santa?

Not rude at all- I find it mean. Obviously if your religion/ culture goes against christianity. But for the sheer reason of being opposed to consumerism and not wanting to lie to your kids, yeah I do sorry!

Mean would imply that it has some kind of detrimental effect on the child. Either that effect is universal across all non-believing children or it is non-existent (based on my own experience of growing up knowing that Santa isn't real I'll go for the latter). Therefore to say that some reasons are more valid than others is ridiculous.

Incidentally, there are plenty of Christians who don't believe in celebrating Christmas at all, let alone Santa.

That's my opinion- it differs to yours, so what??

Christians that don't celebrate the birth of christ is not something I ever heard of during my 20 years weekly church attendance, but whatever..

I think you are taking this too seriously to be honest. A few people have agreed that they personally think it is mean, you don't need to get defensive about it.

It may be your opinion, but you didn't need to be so offensive. If someone said "I think it's incredibly mean to leave your baby to cry/deprive your baby of breastmilk/put your toddler in timeout" there would be an outrage. And unlike those examples, there is absolutely no evidence to suggest that not believing in Santa is in any way harmful to a child!

Fair point, sorry if I came across offensive

Thank you, no hard feelings.

 

[Eternal]

I can get the idea of not doing santa and even mentioned it to my husband, but decided to go with it. I can see it form both sides really, but Christmas really has been blown out of all proportion and I do love the sounds of a simple Christmas although I admit I go over board every year and then wish I hadn't.

Steph - there people who identify themselves as Christians who do not celebrate Christmas, Jehovah's Witness' for example and those who fellow the actual date (which we know is y Christmas as that was a pagan tradition) and then those who don't do Christmas as it's done today but follow a simpler christ focus traction without the gift giving, or Christmas trees etc.

However, I'm a Christian who does do the whole Christmas thing with Santa and trees and sleigh bells lol. But I can understand the other side of it too.

Ah ok thanks! My Church was all for christmas too, and at the church school I went to it was fully celebrated!

Yeah mine too, but I guess Christianity covers a massive spectrum of beliefs. When I ran the children programme at my church the kids Christmas party had a Santa come visit.

I'm a member of a reformed evangelical church which does not celebrate Christmas.

Very interesting, are there particular reasons they do not? I love learning about religion, especially as I'm probably consider unconventional Christian (I'm a mormon).

 

[freckleonear]

I can get the idea of not doing santa and even mentioned it to my husband, but decided to go with it. I can see it form both sides really, but Christmas really has been blown out of all proportion and I do love the sounds of a simple Christmas although I admit I go over board every year and then wish I hadn't.

Steph - there people who identify themselves as Christians who do not celebrate Christmas, Jehovah's Witness' for example and those who fellow the actual date (which we know is y Christmas as that was a pagan tradition) and then those who don't do Christmas as it's done today but follow a simpler christ focus traction without the gift giving, or Christmas trees etc.

However, I'm a Christian who does do the whole Christmas thing with Santa and trees and sleigh bells lol. But I can understand the other side of it too.

Ah ok thanks! My Church was all for christmas too, and at the church school I went to it was fully celebrated!

Yeah mine too, but I guess Christianity covers a massive spectrum of beliefs. When I ran the children programme at my church the kids Christmas party had a Santa come visit.

I'm a member of a reformed evangelical church which does not celebrate Christmas.

Very interesting, are there particular reasons they do not? I love learning about religion, especially as I'm probably consider unconventional Christian (I'm a mormon).

It's a combination of several reasons. The Bible doesn't give us the date of Jesus' birth, and historians and scholars think that Jesus was probably born in the autumn or spring. We are told to celebrate his death and resurrection, but not his birth, and there is no Biblical example of doing so. Christmas was originally adapted by the church from the pagan holiday Saturnalia, which involved human sacrifice, rape and lawlessness. So our church does not celebrate Christmas at all within the church, but members are free to celebrate/not celebrate as they see fit.

 

[Bex84]

I never really thought about not doing father Christmas. It is such a big tradition, engrained in culture and certainly one we have followed in both mine and husbands family. LO's stocking is never really expensive stuff. I think its nice for the magic, I have memories of making stuff for father Christmas and feeling the weight of my stocking at end of my bed and opening them together with my sisters, I can remember these little rubber cats I got one year when I was quite young and I loved them so much yet they were probably about a £1 at most. Christmas for us isn't all about receiving, lo does get presents but its the build up of making things together and spending time together as a family. We have a tradition of taking lo to local garden centre to see the reindeers and father Christmas. We never centre Christmas around the presents (though I love to see my lo's smile when she receives a gift I put lot of thought into and her feeling special and my lo loves giving gifts she has picked and made. My family wernt rich and we didn't have loads of presents but I adore Christmas. I have no issue with people deciding not to do it as everyone has different views. I never felt annoyed that my parents did father Christmas, It is a tradition which is quite prevalent in our culture. I doubt many people truly blame there parents for trying to make things more magical but maybe if they do its more deeply rooted with lying across the board rather than one thing. As I say to each their own. I had a child in one of my classes one ask me about the tooth fairy as her brother told her she was not real, I just ask her what she thought and did she believe? she said yes she did so I told her that's all that matters and we can believe different things to other people.

 

[amytrisha]

Wow, very interesting!
I didn't know some people didn't do the whole 'santa' story I'm so naive

I can totally see both sides as to why it would/wouldn't be done - I don't think either are mean, I guess it's just another parenting choice! I'll most probably go the full monty (tooth fairy, santa, easter bunny) jus cos I remember how magical my childhood was and I'd love my son to experience the same eek can't wait!

 

[bumpy_j]

I was never let to believe that Father Christmas was real but I still loved Christmas, and still do! I do sort of wish I'd had that, though.

I debated it myself but have decided to do it, but only one gift from Father Christmas so that he chooses one special thing to ask for, and so that he doesn't wonder why some children get more than others. I won't say that every child gets a present from Father Christmas either, but I think I'll go with every child who believes gets a present from him (with all other presents being from other people), and then if he asks more I can explain that not everyone lives within the same culture, and that some children can't believe in him, and then I can say because they won't get a gift cos they don't believe we can give them a gift instead, and then work together to do shoeboxes or something... Sorry I'm rambling! It isn't the lie itself that bothers me it's the implication that Christmas is all about the gifts and forgetting people in need that bugs me about it. But it is so magical that it's definitely a nice thing to be able to believe.

See I want to do the 'one gift from Santa' too, but OH is insisting all the presents from us to Joel are from 'Santa' I keep telling him we're going to get awkward questions about why other children receive less than him, and he's like "nah...kids don't ask questions like that". Think he's in for an unpleasant interrogation in the future...

 

[Bex84]

we always do a few from father Christmas the rest from us, the children I have taught always come back to school asking each other what parents got them and father Christmas so I would worry about that lol though I am sure they never take over much notice of who bought there friends what just what they got

 

[tinkerbelle93]

I never got anything from the Easter bunny I think my parents just forgot or didn't realise about that one and used to wonder why some of my friends did haha. I also remember getting to the point where I wondered why Santa brought everyone in developed countries tons of presents but all the children in poverty in places like africa weren't, I think that was when I got older and nearing to figuring out it wasn't real xxx

 

[Bex84]

we didn't have easter bunny either, when I was younger we went to church and had palm sunday where we would lay palms in church and there was a donkey bought into church which we would walk to church from sunday school with and then have little crosses. My parents arnt religious so I don't think they considered easter lol, I think Christmas was more of a tradition though we knew the nativity story and went to church and were involved with nativity every year and knew the meaning. My parents were the one with the tree up on Christmas eve though and we never went to see father Christmas except when it was a school party. I will be doing shoe boxes with lo when she is older (I already do charity stuff but lo isn't really old enough to understand)

 

[vaniilla]

I don't think kids will be missing out if they don't believe in santa, we didn't believe in Santa when we were kids, all of our festivities were geared around new year. It was still a very exciting time and we did have father christmas but all the kids knew it wasn't real and it was generally somebody in the household/neighbourhood dressing up and knocking on doors rather than visiting a grotto. We are doing santa for lo but I don't think he'd be any less happier either way.

 

[Indi84]

I absolute can't wait to do Santa! I'm telling lo about it this year and he is still to little, think Santa's mince pie is still going out though.
I loved lying awake for Santa, the pure excitement and magic!
My eldest sister told me when I was six ish, I carried on pretending for a few years for my mum haha

 

[MrsPear]

Even as a small child I took such pride in choosing gifts for people, it was genuinely fun. And it isn't just about the presents- it's about doing something that person will love. I loved that aspect of Christmas, and still do. People get so much pleasure from giving their children presents and I think children get a similar pleasure from giving their families special things. So, I genuinely think that Father Christmas would impede that.

I don't think it does at all. We'll just be doing one santa present and the rest from us and family, and he will be choosing/making gifts too. Father Christmas is just that tiny extra.

Maybe impede was the wrong word, I think I meant he's just superfluous to it. Obviously he might not be superfluous in another families celebration but I mean just in mine, if that makes sense.

 

[nic18]

I had this conversation with a taxi driver not to long ago, he said he wanted his kids to know they were getting presents because he loved them, not because of Santa! which I totally understand, but Santa's a huge part at Christmas

 

[emyandpotato]

^^ Absolutely, I don't think there's anything wrong with not doing the santa thing. Just likewise I don't think there's anything wrong with doing it, so long as the entire emphasis is not on the superficial.

 

[MissRhead]

I've never heard of anyone not doing the Santa thing, except like you said different religions/cultures. Honestly i have many amazing childhood Christmas memory's, it's magical, it's about children, family! I just couldn't take it away x

 

[HBGirl]

How very dare ALL of you! Father Christmas is real and will be bringing me a present this year. I've been so good all year long!!

 

[Tasha]

We've always done it, but now I can completely understand why you wouldn't as my nine year old still believes but I am having to consider telling him the truth as I don't want hi teased at school. I also don't want to hurt him

 

[mammy2oaklen]

I think it's totally up to the parent what they do and like other aspects of a parenting there is no right and wrong answer

But I completely love the magic of Father Christmas my ds is so excited I couldn't imagine not doing it like others have said they believe in magic for such a small amount of time I think it's just wonderful that they get excited and believe.
Also I never felt lied to when I found out Father Christmas wasn't real.

 

[Lauren25]

Can I ask a question, those who don't do santa now did your parents do santa with you when you were growing up?