Not doing " Father Christmas "

[pinkpolkadot]

Just wanted to say it's really intersting to read different takes on this, I have never really thought about it properly before now!

This year we will be camping down the beach with family and friends over the xmas period so will be having BBQs, playing games, swimming, fishing, having a few drinks (well not me this year as im pregnant!! ) but yeah our xmas day wont be too different to the rest of you.

Sounds amazing! To be fair sounds quite different from our Christmas, mainly as we will be freezing our bits off in our Wooly jumpers in sunny England

 

[ShanandBoc]

Just wanted to say it's really intersting to read different takes on this, I have never really thought about it properly before now!

This year we will be camping down the beach with family and friends over the xmas period so will be having BBQs, playing games, swimming, fishing, having a few drinks (well not me this year as im pregnant!! ) but yeah our xmas day wont be too different to the rest of you.

Sounds amazing! To be fair sounds quite different from our Christmas, mainly as we will be freezing our bits off in our Wooly jumpers in sunny England

Oh yeah haha forgot that the climate here may be a little warmer than the majority on this forum!!

 

[ShanandBoc]

I was wondering about schools, do the non believers ( for whatever reason ) tell the other children. I'd find it hard to believe they don't, kids being kids and all.

In my school everyone believed so parents didn't have that to worry about. I supposed kids now stop believing much earlier xx

Well when i was a child i dont remember even speaking to other kids about santa, it was just a non issue. I certainly didnt go around telling other kids that santa wasnt real and id expect my daughter to do the same, its about respecting other peoples beliefs and choices.

I think if the subject was to come up it would be more about why we dont celebrate xmas and what we do instead etc and that would most likely be when children are older and know about santa anyway

 

[OmarsMum]

We dont celebrate christmas, we're practicing Muslims, I have no clue about the story behind santa or christmas, when we were young my parents used to take us to see santa, we liked it, we loved the gifts & we still have photos.

My couisn who's 14 asked Omar last week if Santa is real, he said yes ofcourse I saw him at the mall last year & I want to go this year we took him to Santa grotto on Friday, he took pics, today we're going to the christmas festival & on Wednesday we're attending a Christmas party. It's magical, I love all the lights & trees, we dont celebrate at home but my little boy loves the celebrations & parties outside.

We live in a Muslim country, but they celebrate Christmas openly everywhere

 

[Yo_Yo]

I was wondering about schools, do the non believers ( for whatever reason ) tell the other children. I'd find it hard to believe they don't, kids being kids and all.

In my school everyone believed so parents didn't have that to worry about. I supposed kids now stop believing much earlier xx

There's four kids at my daughters school not partaking in the Xmas carol service/all things Xmas at school. They haven't said anything negative to other children regarding Santa thankfully.

 

[deafgal]

My parents just did not talk about him. They never encourage me to believe in him Nor they tell me he doesn't exist.They just left it to me. I did tell my son the spirit of Saint Nicholas and magic of love and giving exist. But I am one of those who goes around saying Jesus is the reason for the season. You have Jewish, muslim, Hindu , etc. and I don't think they really celebrate Santa either. Some probably do just for the fun of it. One time, I read that one country thought we worship santa as a religion itself...haha. anyway, I alsoread that santa did not get really popular until the news article, "Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus" https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yes,_Virginia,_there_is_a_Santa_Claus

Anyway, I don't care for santa (never believed in him anyway.my parents couldn't afford presents anyhow).

I know atheists definitely celebrate santa with their kids.

 

[ShanandBoc]

My parents just did not talk about him. They never encourage me to believe in him Nor they tell me he doesn't exist.They just left it to me. I did tell my son the spirit of Saint Nicholas and magic of love and giving exist. But I am one of those who goes around saying Jesus is the reason for the season. You have Jewish, muslim, Hindu , etc. and I don't think they really celebrate Santa either. Some probably do just for the fun of it. One time, I read that one country thought we worship santa as a religion itself...haha. anyway, I alsoread that santa did not get really popular until the news article, "yes, virginia"

Anyway, I don't care for santa (never believed in him anyway.my parents couldn't afford presents anyhow)

Yeah i never recall my mum saying to me "santa is not real" either. I never gave it much thought tbh, it was just part of something i didnt celebrate

 

[deafgal]

I never ever felt lied to when I found out Father Christmas wasn't real. However like a pp said I have memories of how magical it was and being convinced I'd heard his sleigh! I absolutely cannot wait until lo is old enough to understand leaving out the mince pie and carrot for Father Christmas and Rudolph!

My husband's parents were BIG into getting their kids into believing santa....I mean they went extreme. He believed when other kids stopped believing. He told me he was crushed and heartbroken when he found out the truth. He swear he would never do that to his kids the way his parents did.

 

[Eleanor ace]

I didn't "do" the whole Father Christmas thing as a child. I knew he was just a story but that other children believed he was real and never told them he wasn't. Children are so imaginative, I really don't think it would occur to most children to say Father Christmas isn't real, most would just naturally fall into the game and go along with it, whilst understanding that it is make believe.
I never felt like my parents were mean or that Christmas lacked magic because we didn't believe in the big guy! We still got presents, we just understood that they came from people who loved us which did make me feel very cherished and appreciated.

 

[SophiasMummy]

What ever happened to Christmas spirit, the magic of Christmas and encouraging children to have an imagination. My daughter loves to imagine things like dragons in the trees snd indians in the forest when we're out walking and loves to make stories up its amazing and refeshing to have a child not ruined by a sociaty that prefers to sit there child infront of a tv or computer instead of reading storys, playing games and going outside. I wont tell my LO santas not real she is a child and deserves a childhood not to thrown into the awful world of our sociaty. Just think how much most of us miss being kids being excited about seeing santa and playing with new toys and reading books how is it fair to take that from our own children

With all due respect, just because a parent doesnt teach their children about santa doesnt mean they dont have an imagination or that they plonk their child in front of a tv and not read them stories etc or that their child misses out on playing with new toys?

DD loves being a princess, putting her fairy outfit on, pretending to be a lion etc. I dont see how not teaching a child about santa takes any of that away?

I agree theres nothing more beautiful than a childs innocence and imagination

By telling a child something isnt real that a lot children do believe is real is taking away some of there innocence as children (I meant ruining the innocence of childhood not just imagination sorry) in my opinion but obviously thats just my opinion. Ive lost count of the number of people who have told me how amazing it is to see such an imaginitive happy child as my LO is and I couldnt bring my self to take away that innocence by saying santa or the tooth fairy etc isnt real, she doesnt care about money or how many presents she gets, she just loves to believe in magic and santa and to see all her family on christmas day

What about Muslim, Hindu, Buddist and Sikh families who choose not to celebrate Christmas because its really, based on a religious event? Is it okay for their children not to hear about Santa? Genuinely curious there.

I think its different when no one else in your family celebrates Christmas, there's always cousins and things plus as young children tend spend a lot of time with other children generally who have the same religious beliefs family, family friends etc. Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist and Sikh families are a lot more religious than the general population, where as a lot of people who celebrate Christmas don't go to church often and don't actually practice their religion very often, I consider myself Christian but I generally only go to church for weddings, christenings and funerals, does that make sense.

 

[SophiasMummy]

I was wondering about schools, do the non believers ( for whatever reason ) tell the other children. I'd find it hard to believe they don't, kids being kids and all.

In my school everyone believed so parents didn't have that to worry about. I supposed kids now stop believing much earlier xx

I remember I found out from older kids at school that Santa wasn't real, I was probably around 8, but by that time I was getting suspicious anyway as I never used to be able to catch him leaving presents . Though my mum told us if we stopped believing in Santa we wouldn't get presents anymore so we still said we believed in Santa to her for quite a few years.

Infact I still get a Santa sack though I'm 23 and don't live at home anymore and it's usually underwear and things now, I'm not complaining though its usually things I need, I usually spend the same amount on my mum as she does on me each year now, my parents never spent money on toys and things for us unless it was a birthday or Christmas and had a set amount they would spend each year, so Christmas was special to us and still is, we also normally travel to see relatives that live over two hours away every other year too, so its more than just presents.

 

[deafgal]

"....In fact I still get a Santa sack*though I'm 23 and don't live at home anymore and it's usually underwear..." https://www.pinterest.com/pin/217017275765476183/

 

[SophiasMummy]

"....In fact I still get a Santa sack*though I'm 23 and don't live at home anymore and it's usually underwear..." https://www.pinterest.com/pin/217017275765476183/

Lmao oops

 

[deafgal]

What ever happened to Christmas spirit, the magic of Christmas and encouraging children to have an imagination. My daughter loves to imagine things like dragons in the trees snd indians in the forest when we're out walking and loves to make stories up its amazing and refeshing to have a child not ruined by a sociaty that prefers to sit there child infront of a tv or computer instead of reading storys, playing games and going outside. I wont tell my LO santas not real she is a child and deserves a childhood not to thrown into the awful world of our sociaty. Just think how much most of us miss being kids being excited about seeing santa and playing with new toys and reading books how is it fair to take that from our own children

With all due respect, just because a parent doesnt teach their children about santa doesnt mean they dont have an imagination or that they plonk their child in front of a tv and not read them stories etc or that their child misses out on playing with new toys?

DD loves being a princess, putting her fairy outfit on, pretending to be a lion etc. I dont see how not teaching a child about santa takes any of that away?

I agree theres nothing more beautiful than a childs innocence and imagination

By telling a child something isnt real that a lot children do believe is real is taking away some of there innocence as children (I meant ruining the innocence of childhood not just imagination sorry) in my opinion but obviously thats just my opinion. Ive lost count of the number of people who have told me how amazing it is to see such an imaginitive happy child as my LO is and I couldnt bring my self to take away that innocence by saying santa or the tooth fairy etc isnt real, she doesnt care about money or how many presents she gets, she just loves to believe in magic and santa and to see all her family on christmas day

What about Muslim, Hindu, Buddist and Sikh families who choose not to celebrate Christmas because its really, based on a religious event? Is it okay for their children not to hear about Santa? Genuinely curious there.

I think its different when no one else in your family celebrates Christmas, there's always cousins and things plus as young children tend spend a lot of time with other children generally who have the same religious beliefs family, family friends etc. Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist and Sikh families are a lot more religious than the general population, where as a lot of people who celebrate Christmas don't go to church often and don't actually practice their religion very often, I consider myself Christian but I generally only go to church for weddings, christenings and funerals, does that make sense.

Where I am from, there are so much diversity ..people of other faiths come to U.S. but their family are back in their home country. The kids may have a few to little friends that share their faith. Except the places they go to worship but It never means they live in the same school district.

 

[lhancock90]

What ever happened to Christmas spirit, the magic of Christmas and encouraging children to have an imagination. My daughter loves to imagine things like dragons in the trees snd indians in the forest when we're out walking and loves to make stories up its amazing and refeshing to have a child not ruined by a sociaty that prefers to sit there child infront of a tv or computer instead of reading storys, playing games and going outside. I wont tell my LO santas not real she is a child and deserves a childhood not to thrown into the awful world of our sociaty. Just think how much most of us miss being kids being excited about seeing santa and playing with new toys and reading books how is it fair to take that from our own children

With all due respect, just because a parent doesnt teach their children about santa doesnt mean they dont have an imagination or that they plonk their child in front of a tv and not read them stories etc or that their child misses out on playing with new toys?

DD loves being a princess, putting her fairy outfit on, pretending to be a lion etc. I dont see how not teaching a child about santa takes any of that away?

I agree theres nothing more beautiful than a childs innocence and imagination

By telling a child something isnt real that a lot children do believe is real is taking away some of there innocence as children (I meant ruining the innocence of childhood not just imagination sorry) in my opinion but obviously thats just my opinion. Ive lost count of the number of people who have told me how amazing it is to see such an imaginitive happy child as my LO is and I couldnt bring my self to take away that innocence by saying santa or the tooth fairy etc isnt real, she doesnt care about money or how many presents she gets, she just loves to believe in magic and santa and to see all her family on christmas day

What about Muslim, Hindu, Buddist and Sikh families who choose not to celebrate Christmas because its really, based on a religious event? Is it okay for their children not to hear about Santa? Genuinely curious there.

I think its different when no one else in your family celebrates Christmas, there's always cousins and things plus as young children tend spend a lot of time with other children generally who have the same religious beliefs family, family friends etc. Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist and Sikh families are a lot more religious than the general population, where as a lot of people who celebrate Christmas don't go to church often and don't actually practice their religion very often, I consider myself Christian but I generally only go to church for weddings, christenings and funerals, does that make sense.

But other members of the family might? Friends from school will? Etc i just think people wouldn't raise at eyebrow at a religious reason for not celebrating but for any other reason, like the ones listed here, are considered unfair.

 

[emyandpotato]

I was wondering about schools, do the non believers ( for whatever reason ) tell the other children. I'd find it hard to believe they don't, kids being kids and all.

In my school everyone believed so parents didn't have that to worry about. I supposed kids now stop believing much earlier xx

I went to a mostly Muslim school and we learnt about all of the festivals and celebrations. We'd celebrate Eid and Diwali and there would always be references to Chanukah, just as we learnt different songs and heard stories from all different religions in assembly. It was great! At our Eid parties saris were the norm and there was always someone there who'd put mehndi on all the girls' hands. As far as Christmas went I seem to remember a lot of the kids in my class, who weren't from British or Christian backgrounds, talking about santa, so I think there was a small part of celebrating to fit in for some?! I don't think there was an overly big deal made of it tbh! And when it was mentioned, it was just in context of people who celebrate it get presents, just like people who celebrate other days get presents on those!

 

[TwilightAgain]

I figured it out pretty quickly when I was young but the years that I believed were so magical. It's the memories that you look back on with fondness as a kid, a day to play with new toys and games with your families. I couldn't entertain the thought for a second to not do Santa. I didn't feel lied to at all, I think i'd feel sad if my Dad hadn't done Santa because as a kid it did make Christmas so much more exciting.

 

[BigLegEmma]

What are the origins? The bloody sacrificial ones? This isn't something I've ever heard of.

Comes from Saturn, also depicted as Old Father Time and the Grim Reaper; during the Roman festival of Saturnalia, parents would sacrifice their children to Saturn. They used to decorate trees with candles made from the fat of the sacrificed children and decapitated heads (now Christmas baubles).

I'm caught between wanting to give my child the magical time I had as a child and doing it knowing the origins, because as a Christian* knowingly celebrating Christmas (a festival appropriated from paganism) in such a way, it's not good spiritually. But if I introduce the St Nicholas story as a way of gifting a secret present, maybe that could work...I've got at least another two years before I have to worry about it anyway; next year, Bump will only be about 7mos old, so too young to give a hoot.

I probably won't be immediately completely comfortable whatever I decide, but will do something for my child to have a wondrous time and over the years it will turn into our own family tradition. I guess whatever we do, we'll keep it basic and family-oriented, with lots of crafts and homemade decorations and giving to others less fortunate. Until now, I've not needed to celebrate it at all; my family and I get together for a family meal (at least, when I lived in England, we did), but we didn't exchange gifts.

I've thought about celebrating Chanukah, as that's what Yeshua/Jesus would have celebrated, or maybe teaching Bump about all the different ways different cultures celebrate togetherness in winter and just making a big Festivus celebration that doesn't lean in any particular direction

(*non-denominational, don't celebrate the Sabbath as Sunday, because it's Saturday, don't go to church, don't really call myself Christian as Yeshua never said to, but that's the closest 'religion' I jive with)

I went to a mostly Muslim school and we learnt about all of the festivals and celebrations. We'd celebrate Eid and Diwali and there would always be references to Chanukah, just as we learnt different songs and heard stories from all different religions in assembly. It was great! At our Eid parties saris were the norm and there was always someone there who'd put mehndi on all the girls' hands. As far as Christmas went I seem to remember a lot of the kids in my class, who weren't from British or Christian backgrounds, talking about santa, so I think there was a small part of celebrating to fit in for some?! I don't think there was an overly big deal made of it tbh! And when it was mentioned, it was just in context of people who celebrate it get presents, just like people who celebrate other days get presents on those!

See, I like this. I went to a Jewish school and had a similar experience of learning about world religions and beliefs as many students were (other than Jewish, obviously) Muslim, Hindu etc.

 

[ILoveShoes]

Thanks for the explanation I'm 31 and I've never heard that before. I'd be interested to hear if that's something that's widely known, by a lot of people.
Xx

 

[BigLegEmma]

Thanks for the explanation I'm 31 and I've never heard that before. I'd be interested to hear if that's something that's widely known, by a lot of people.
Xx

I think lots of traditions change over time and are adopted and adapted by new cultures, so who knows, maybe I'll do Santa; it never scarred me, but I never really believed it deep inside. I couldn't understand how he got in when we didn't have a chimney (we lived in an apartment when I was young), so my mum used to leave the kitchen window open once I voiced that concern I remember going along with it, and the half eaten mince pies and carrots because it was fun. I think tbh the baby will decide for us what tack we take. Or maybe with all our relatives living overseas, we could say Santa delivers their presents for them, or something, like a megical Fed Ex.

Here's another one for you - Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer/flying reindeer comes from reindeer in the Arctic Circle gorging on psychedelic red cap mushrooms - when shamans ate them, they'd realised they produced hallucinogenic trips which made them feel like they were flying

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MkCS9ePWuLU