Not meaning to offend.

[irish_cob]

I really think it's more to do with the personality of the baby than how you choose to feed them. My eldest was ff from 5 weeks and still she was incredibly difficult to get any distance from, as a baby she wanted holding all the time, as an infant she wanted entertaining all the time, I was always sitting on the floor all day trying to think of new ways to entertain her, as a toddler she needed constant attention and constant entertainment. I felt so trapped and resentful sometimes with her, I could never cook a meal or even make a cup of tea, she was such hard work and the feelings of suffocation and no respite at all like you're describing was awful with her. She's still v hard work now at 2 and a half!

My little one on the other hand is chilled. Yes she breastfeeds a lot, every 1-2 hours in the day I would say, but in between times she's happy to sit in her bouncy chair and watch me whilst I cook or sits in the bathroom whilst I shower. She doesn't spend the whole day crying like her sister did (and still does some days). She likes to explore her toys. Also whilst she's breastfeeding she doesn't need any other entertainment so I don't have to spend ages trying to amuse a miserable baby. She sleeps about 8 hours at night, wakes for a feed and goes back down for another couple of hours. I feel much less trapped and claustrophobic this time round even though I'm breastfeeding and I think that's just due to the fact that overall she's a more settled baby and I can have 10 mins to myself to have a shower or make a cup of tea whilst she plays on her playmat or sits in her chair and she won't have a meltdown just because I'm not entertaining her right that second!

I found my first daughter very hard and I don't think it was just because she's my first, I think it's just down to personality. If they were all guaranteed to be like my second baby I'd have another one, but I couldn't deal with another high needs one like my first!

 

[Starry Night]

I will say that I liked the freedom that came with baby who fed from the bottle. DH and I went to the movies when DS was only 2 weeks old. So even if I do work out BFing this time around I will probably try pumping and get baby used to the bottle so we can go out when we need to.

The idea of BF'ing every 1 to 2 hours for months on end is not appealing to me in any way, shape or form. I am going to try and see if it works and if I like it but I don't cope with stress well at all so if I need to switch then I probably will. Also, FF is what I know so it feels safe and familiar. It can be scary trying something new.

 

[girlinyork]

I will say that I liked the freedom that came with baby who fed from the bottle. DH and I went to the movies when DS was only 2 weeks old. So even if I do work out BFing this time around I will probably try pumping and get baby used to the bottle so we can go out when we need to.

The idea of BF'ing every 1 to 2 hours for months on end is not appealing to me in any way, shape or form. I am going to try and see if it works and if I like it but I don't cope with stress well at all so if I need to switch then I probably will. Also, FF is what I know so it feels safe and familiar. It can be scary trying something new.

DD only fed every 1-2 hours during growth spurts. Otherwise she was 3-4 hours. I actually found the idea of FF restricting because of all the sterilising etc. Night feeds were a doddle - I slept through most of them and DD would settle so quickly because she was fed before she could work herself up and start crying. Something which she only did if I was away and expressed milk needed warming. She consistently slept through the night at about 8-10 weeks. I think it is as PP says - it really depends on the character of the baby. My DD is very laid back and social. She is happy to go to anyone and to stay with anyone. If she gets clingy I know it's because she is unwell or teething

 

[momi]

I kind of understand what you mean - as a FF mother, I'm able to use others help to feed my LO and sometimes it seems like he goes longer than BF babies between feeds, especially at night. So there is a little more independence maybe? But I don't think BF babies are clingier than FF ones..

 

[emalou90]

Thanks everyone for all your input.
It's nice hearing all sides to it.

Needless to say, baby is here, sucking like a champ but the pain is incredible and my after pains make it worse. I can't relax during feedings.
I gave baby formula last night, not feeling like a huge failure as I had fed her for almost 24 hours, the best I could manage really. But I'm much happier seeing her feed from a bottle.

I must be one of those mums who just feel better FF

 

[girlinyork]

Congratulations on your new baby xx

 

[Popples1]

Don't forget you can combi feed if you want to. I've been doing it for 11 weeks now (due to latch issues and low supply) and although it's not what I planned, the silver lining for me is the freedom for DH to do an evening feed so I can go to bed early!

 

[Snow Owl]

One of our play mates breastfed her child till 9 months and she most definately is not clingy.

I think it comes down to the child, really not how they are fed.

 

[Pearls18]

DS2 rarely feeds, I reckon he feeds less than your average FF baby, he will feed for a few minutes every few hours, I don't watch the clock. I have no idea how he is putting the weight on he must be very efficient. All babies are different, unless you try you won't know (not saying you *have* to try lol, just saying it's hard to tell what a baby will be like). My first wasn't strapped to me either, he would feed for about half an hour every 3 hours or so when settled down, he was much more of a routine feeder. They're all different.

 

[Pearls18]

Didn't see your other post, congratulations

 

[LegoHouse]

Never really understood why someone wouldn't want their baby to be clingy. They're only tiny for such a short time. They learn to be so trusting if they're given what they need when they need it.

 

[girlinyork]

Never really understood why someone wouldn't want their baby to be clingy. They're only tiny for such a short time. They learn to be so trusting if they're given what they need when they need it.

I can remember when DD was 4 weeks old being told re: the breastfeeding, "You'll never get time away from her!" and I was really confused. Why would I want to leave my 4 week old baby? I went into pregnancy accepting that I'd probably not get "time off" for the first year or so if I breastfed and that was fine because it's only a year iykwim. I can leave her with DH or MIL for a day/night now she's older if I needed to but I'm just so much happier with her around. Think it's just my personality though. I need to have her around me most of the time