Not pushing throughout 2nd stage of labour

[Laughing Girl]

I'm keen to find out more about this, as from what I have read, not pushing your baby out, unless you have an urge to push, seems to make a lot of sense to me. I found the pushing bit of my last labour quite confusing as I didn't feel compelled to do it and it just seemed wrong but I did it anyway (did as I was told - to knackered to do otherwise!) and of course out she came but I would love my new little girls entry earthside to be a bit more zen..........
Do any of you have experience of this or stories to tell? Would love to hear if so.
Thanks xx

 

[lesleyann]

With my son I point blank refused to push! My body had completely taken over by that point so when the midwife told me to push I told her that I would not push and my body did it all for me and seemingly stoped for a moment to allow the opening to streach while I was getting "ring of fire" and it just felt right.

With my daughter however I got an unstopable urge to push and thats exactly what I did and I found that great to the midwifes never told me to push or anything though and I never got the ring of fire.

If it makes any difference son 7.5lbs waters broken, daughter 6.9lbs born in her waters

 

[letshaveababy]

With DD I all of a sudden had an overwhelming urge to push.

I was sitting up, off the side of the bed (in the middle of getting an epidural, which I never actually received any medication), and a gush of fluids came out and I NEEDED to push. I screamed at everyone that I was pushing, so DH and the anesthesiologist (sp?) had to slowly push me to a laying position so that I could push her out. There was about a 2 minute break where the urge disappeared, which gave my body a break, and then when it came again, out she came!

 

[Sommerfugl]

I never felt the urge to push. I remember the midwives saying how my body was doing it all for me but never really thought about it at the time. Towards the end though, they kept telling my to push her face out. I was thinking "wtf? You just said her head is out how can her head be out but her face still be in?" (I was so tired) And I sort of tried to push in my stubborn, tired sort of way, but I didn't really feel I knew 'how' to push.

I strongly believe that our bodies will tell us what to do and that we should listen to them.

 

[becstar]

Women in comas can give birth without pushing, so it isn't always necessary.

 

[Laughing Girl]

I never felt the urge to push. I remember the midwives saying how my body was doing it all for me but never really thought about it at the time. Towards the end though, they kept telling my to push her face out. I was thinking "wtf? You just said her head is out how can her head be out but her face still be in?" (I was so tired) And I sort of tried to push in my stubborn, tired sort of way, but I didn't really feel I knew 'how' to push.

I strongly believe that our bodies will tell us what to do and that we should listen to them.

This was my experience birthing Isla too. I agree with your parting comment as well.

 

[shopgirl771]

cant comment on breathing baby down as i havent tried this (yet!). i intend to try this method this time tho.
like u i agree it seems to make more sense.
last time i had the urge to push but they wouldnt let me as they wouldnt do an internal on me to establish how dilated i was as it hadnt been long enough since they did the last one (rolls eyes). by the time they did do an internal and found i was fully dilated id lost the urge to push and needed the syntonin drip to kick start my contractions again. i didnt get on with forced pushing or fake pushing as i called it and really struggled. i pushed for 2.5 hrs and was told if baby didnt make an appearence by such a time id need an assisted birth but i think that motivated me in such a way and baby was born bang on that deadline. im amazed i didnt tear the amount of pushing i did.

but yes i agree we need to listen to our bodies and thats why this time im insisting they give me an internal the minute i feel any pushing urges and i will be using those urges to help breath baby down. none of this forced stuff. it didnt suit me last time, i doubt it will this time!

if my instincts are correct ill have a lot smoother 2nd stage this time. x

 

[Blah11]

I think its one of those things thats different with every woman. I felt uncontrollable urges to push with both my children and if I didn't actively push my body would make me do it anyway.

 

[NaturalMomma]

My body pushed on it's own. I didn't have to push at all. The pushing my body was doing felt like that involuntary feeling you get in your chest and stomach when you vomit, except this was in my vagina. It was very strange feeling, didn't hurt or anything.

 

[Laughing Girl]

My body pushed on it's own. I didn't have to push at all. The pushing my body was doing felt like that involuntary feeling you get in your chest and stomach when you vomit, except this was in my vagina. It was very strange feeling, didn't hurt or anything.

THIS is what I am hoping for............so helpful, thank you for sharing. What did you do to get to this? Did you let your body take over and drop any fears you were holding on too? If so, HOW??

 

[NaturalMomma]

I don't think there was anything I could have done to stop it. My body just did it completely on it's own. After I was done with transition there was about 15 minutes when there were no contractions, and that was before the pushing started. It was weird, and I assumed it was my body taking a little rest until the final haul. Then the pushing just started. Since this was my second birth I wasn't afraid. I remember being afraid with ds1, but as soon as labor started it went away. Not because I was any less afraid, but because I just focused on the moment instead of anything else. One thing I did do with ds2 is I would close my eyes and imagine a flower opening, that was suppose to represent my cervix opening and baby coming down.

 

[Laughing Girl]

I don't think there was anything I could have done to stop it. My body just did it completely on it's own. After I was done with transition there was about 15 minutes when there were no contractions, and that was before the pushing started. It was weird, and I assumed it was my body taking a little rest until the final haul. Then the pushing just started. Since this was my second birth I wasn't afraid. I remember being afraid with ds1, but as soon as labor started it went away. Not because I was any less afraid, but because I just focused on the moment instead of anything else. One thing I did do with ds2 is I would close my eyes and imagine a flower opening, that was suppose to represent my cervix opening and baby coming down.

I'm in awe!
Thanks so much - so helpful and insightful.......x

 

[madasa]

I describe this in my birth story (in my siggy)

Google "michel o'dent, fetal ejection reflex" - - it's not something you can MAKE happen, but you can set up your environment to increase the chances of it. Generally, you need quiet and low lights. You need to feel safe, secure and unobserved, you need to feel you have "privacy". Lights on and the door open and people coming and going and chattering <<< not helpful

On the day, try not to overthink it. Do what feels good. If you need to move, move. If you feel "pushy", push a little and see how it feels. If it hurts, stop, or move if you want and see how that feels. Trust yourself. Trust your body. You'll be great

 

[Sam Pearson]

My body pushed on it's own. I didn't have to push at all. The pushing my body was doing felt like that involuntary feeling you get in your chest and stomach when you vomit, except this was in my vagina. It was very strange feeling, didn't hurt or anything.

This is how it was for me with my, 3rd and 4th births and it was great, very gentle.

With my first I had an urge to push and so I did and that was great, too.

With my second I had no urge to push but got a strong feeling that bub was in distress when she was close to being born so I pushed even with no contractions to get her out as fast as I could. She did have the cord wrapped around her neck twice and it might have been that she had come so far down the birth canal that with the cord wrapped around twice she had reached the end of her tether so to speak.

All you need to do is listen to your body.

 

[Pielette]

It was the same for me actually. My body did it without me doing a thing. I'd describe it like waves, my body just reached a peak of pushing, then subsided, a peak then subsided and so on until he was born. It didn't feel like one big push and then stop, it was literally like waves. It wasn't painful, just intense.
I firmly believe my body did it on its own because I was so relaxed and willing to let it all happen, if that makes sense. My mind wasn't fighting my body.
Most amazing experience!

 

[Kess]

My body pushed on it's own. I didn't have to push at all. The pushing my body was doing felt like that involuntary feeling you get in your chest and stomach when you vomit, except this was in my vagina. It was very strange feeling, didn't hurt or anything.

That's it, that's exactly how it felt! My body pushed, exactly as NaturalMomma described, only every few contractions, until his head was nearly crowning then I consciously pushed as I was getting severe pubis symphysis pain and wanted him OUT. With how hard consciously pushing was I am amazed some women do that for ages. Am I correct that some women deliberately push baby all the way from the cervix??

 

[Sam Pearson]

Am I correct that some women deliberately push baby all the way from the cervix??

Apparently they do. That's one great way to get haemmaroids (not sure how to spell that).

I'm pretty sure that nobody would do that on their own but hospitals love to coach you to push and time the pushing to coincide with contractions. If you are unaware and it's your first time you'd probably believe them that it's necessary because that's what everybody in the movies does.

I found my urge to push in my first birth wasn't necessarily occuring with a contraction.

My take on it is this...yes, follow your body so if you get the urge to push go ahead but it should be more along the lines of how you might push with a big bowel movement - to help it along when it's ready to exit but no way would you waste your time pushing a poo out before it's actually at the exit door YK?

As well as causing haemmaroids it undermines the labouring woman if people are telling her what to do rather than telling her to listen to her body or asking her what they should do. She becomes the one following orders rather than following her body.

 

[Sam Pearson]

I thought this explains it well.

https://www.babycenter.com/0_how-to-push-should-your-body-be-the-guide_1745336.bc

 

[Laughing Girl]

Thanks everyone, for all your words of wisdom and info - so helpful. I have my 28 week midwife appt next week so will chat with her about it and gauge how into the idea she is or if I will have to persuade her to go with me on it.
xx

 

[ljo1984]

with imogen id had epidural, but with freya i anted to do the whole breathing the baby out, but when it came to it my body was shouting push so thats what i did and couldnt stop it, my mw just let me get on with it, and just told me what was going on down the business end lol.