Not sure if just shocked or disappointed :(

Discussion in 'Gender Disappointment' started by Mamamumum, Aug 14, 2017.

  1. Mamamumum

    Mamamumum Well-Known Member

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    I feel horribly guilty and can't talk to anyone irl as everyone I know is "anti" gender preference which just makes me feel worse.
    I'm 16wks with baby #3, I have a 4yr old son and a 1yr old daughter already. This whole pregnancy I have been positive it's a boy right from day one. I already had a name I really liked picked out and was just mentally "having a boy". Well we had our gender scan a couple of days ago and the sonographer was certain that it is actually another little girl I am carrying. My son was desperately hoping for a brother and I feel like I've let him down :( I wanted another boy too. Partly I think because I feel like I am better bonded with my son than my daughter. We had a bit of a rocky start and I think it has had a long term effect so that is now my experience of what having a daughter is like :(. We had a horrible time naming our daughter, there was literally nothing we fell in love with and it took weeks and weeks after her birth to choose and even now I'm not 100% happy with her name but there are leans of boys names I really want to get to use but I already feel pushed into having to choose something I don't love. This may be our last baby but I find myself wondering if my OH could possibly be persuaded into having another so we can hopefully have another boy. But I'm put off by the idea we might get a 3rd girl :( I just feel sad and confused and let down. I know these are all tiny, really silly reasons to be disappointed but I can't help it :(
     
  2. Johnsa37

    Johnsa37 Well-Known Member

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    I am dealing with some gender disappointment with having boy #2, so this is really interesting to put things into perspective. I didn't want to read and run. Please know that your feelings, whatever they may be and for whatever reason, are perfectly acceptable, valid, and normal. Hugs!!! :hugs:
     
  3. Mamamumum

    Mamamumum Well-Known Member

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    Thank you Johnsa37. And the same to you. I'm glad if nothing else that my post offered a different perspective.
    I'm finding that I'm getting more used to the idea that it is another girl but I still keeping thinking "him, he" etc like I was before :/ and now I'm just waiting for my official 20wk scan to come round half expecting them to tell us that it is actually a boy and that the other clinic got it wrong :/ which I'm pretty convinced they didn't by the way as I saw the potty shot and there was definitely not even a hint of boy bits to be seen!
     
  4. LoraLoo

    LoraLoo Pregnant with a Rainbow

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    If its any consolation...my boy gets stuck right in with the girls- he loves having sisters, they do his nails and hair and everything! 😅
    Seriously thoigh, the bond between my girls is stronger than my 2 boys have. Tbat might change as they get older. I always think its lovely for a girl to have another Sister when theyre older too, someone to confined in etc. Plus, they look really cute in matchy outfits ;)
    Im sure its just a shock as youve had a boy in your head, once she is here you wouldnt change her for the world
     

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