~~++October Bumpkins 2012++~~

[dizzydoll]

5 days to scan

Thanks ladies I'll have to try hard to stay strong

Hormone train is steaming on through the past few days haha
I've just randomly felt like crying even though I'm not upset about anything so I just sit there getting mad at myself and end up feeling really uncomfortable

 

[Feanorous]

Morning girls..

It feels like there is the next wave of scans coming up, so exciting! We have booked a private one for Saturday to double check the gender as the NHS one wasn't very sure. I just don't think I could cope with the shock now that we are calling baby a she!

This is really OT but I feel I have to share and need some advice.
We have a very very nosy neighbour, and she is obsessed, literally obsessed with Cats. Last night I came home to a typed out official letter from her saying that she cannot ignore the neglect and abandonment of our cats any longer!??
She has basically listed out times and dates that we have been away for the weekend and left our cats alone. I don't know how she thinks she knows this, because it just is not true. Once or twice we have left them from late on a Friday night until Sunday lunch time, with food and water on a timer, radio on etc but she is accusing us of leaving them for 4 days this past weekend, totally uncared for! My friend actually came in once every day so she has no idea what she is talking about.
I have no idea how to respond to her without getting really angry! The thing that annoys me most if that she is practically stalking our house and our movements. It feels totally wrong! How dare she look through our windows (she had to, to know some of the stuff she said in her letter).
I am trying not to get stressed but I am so upset. Our cats are nothing but loved and cared for, they are everything to us

I could understand if she saw them outside looking skinny/deprived or something but they aren't at all! Grrrr

What do you girls think I should do?
xx

 

[Lady-K]

Ha! What a weirdo!

I wouldn't reply by letter. I'd go and see her. Don't stoop to her level. Sounds like a mad old widow with nothing better to do? Feel sorry for her if you can.

When you see her, explain to her what you've just said (without emotion if you can manage). Say your cats are very well-cared for, even when you go away (timed food, neighbours popping in) and if she is not convinced, she is more than welcome to contact the RSPCA and you will welcome them in gladly.

However weird your neighbours are, the last thing you want to do is fall out with them (believe me, I've been there). So try and be open and calm and inviting and friendly (will make her look all the more silly too for her typed out nonsense!) If you need to, say you have a slight concern that she's felt the need to keep watch on your pets, by looking through you windows etc., without feeling she could approach you directly first. And that you would rather she came to you and spoke to you about it.

We had an altercation with our neighbour a few years ago about our 2 cats. Although it was a slightly different situation because he HATED them. He'd kept a log book about every time they'd dared to jump over the fence and poo in his garden, and had contacted the environmental agency about it (who laughed at him). We had to erect chicken wire at the top of our fence to stop them going over (and he laid out broken glass there too just for good measure). Of course, that didn't stop them. My DH said to him "The fact that you keep a log book says far more about you than it does about our cats). He later listened to one of our cats die, and did nothing, so we fell out forever. But that's another story. Thankfully, he's moved out now!

 

[cheshire]

That is a really hard situation with the neighbour. On the upside you may have a convenient person on hand if you do go away to feed your cats!!

If it were me I would go and talk to her and explain that someone does come when you are away and you are very grateful for her concern and you understand as an animal lover yourself. Sounds like she might know very little about cats though! I feed my neighbours cats and my mums cat when they go away and I do not see any of them, they hate strangers (even my mums cat who knows me is rarely in when I go there) they are happy in their own home and if new and strange staff are going in to give food, fine by them but don't expect friendliness unless they feel like it!!

Maybe, if you can bear it, ask her to feed them when you go away next time. Then she can see for herself that it is practically impossible to abandon and upset a CAT!

As for the looking in your windows thing, that is a step too far. Get an alarm that will go off and annoy the crap out of her. Bet she won't do it again!! We have a few neighbour hood kids who were looking in the window of the old man at the end of the road, he drew two huge eyes and stuck them on the window the old man is a blast!

7 days to the scan, I am starting to panic now, as I always do before scans!!

Hope everyone is well

 

[Flutterly]

Wow, clearly your neighbour has nothing better to do with herself! The advice above is exactly what I would have said so I shan't repeat! Let us know what you do though!!

So exciting for the next round of scans! I feel like mine was ages ago now. My little man is so so active now. I was just having a little game with him...rub belly, kick Mummy!! He had a little party last night and gave Daddy a massive kick! He loves it so much bless him I don't think I'll ever get bored of seeing my belly jolt out!!

 

[dizzydoll]

Aw hun sorry to hear the trouble with your neighbour! I think the others have given great advice so I won't repeat it either haha

I had a really weird dream last night that I could feel baby's head poking out like kinda above my vagina (under the skin like) and move it over and back It was so weird, when I woke up I had to check to make sure bump was still in the right place lol
I think it's cuz baby has taken to kicking/punching me in the centre of my bump quite low. They don't appreciate me sitting with my feet up and laptop on my lap haha it's like it's trying to push it away haha

 

[Hopeful42nd]

About the crazy cat lady, I'd have a chat with her like lady K says, but I would also contact your local police about what your rights are in terms of her peeping Tom and stocking behaviors. Her issue is likely one of mental illness, as they tend to focus their obsessions on outside sources. You can also in your talk make it clear that she is not welcome to set foot on your property without your permission. Once you've done so you actually have the right to have her charged with trespassing if she does. I had issues with someone claiming an incident with our dog that didn't occur and a month after the fact. We called animal control and let them know we were having a separate dispute with this individual and that they have told us this claim. They put a note on file do as not to react to this persons allegations without proof and thanked us. I agree just remember you have to live next to this person so beware. Is she an older woman or younger?

 

[Feanorous]

Thanks to everyone that replied and sorry to taek the thread off topic!
I am still feeling so upset about it, it's like character assination or something to bandy around words like neglect and abandonment, especially with a baby on the way!

When we first moved in, she offered to look after our cats whilst we went on holiday and she did a couple of times but she would keep a diary, with days/times of absolutely everything the cats did...even down to if they had used the litter tray! She would then come round the next day for a de-brief! She was very critical about what sort of food we were giving them, what sort of toys they had etc....She even bought one of them a new bed (we had 2!).
She then started to be critical of other things in the house so we backed off from her and haven't really spoken to her much in the past couple of years.

She is probably early 50's and lives alone. She has one Cat and I have been in her house once and it's like a Cat's palace, stuff everywhere!

I will have a mull over all of your suggestions, i really appreciate you guys helping me. I am not great with confrontation, I react emotionally

I'll keep you posted!
xxx

 

[dizzydoll]

Ah god sounds like she really treats her cat like a child, a bit ott really!!
She probably thinks she's doing the right thing but not everyone is as cat crazy and your cats are perfectly happy with the relationship you have with them i'm sure

 

[Leikela]

Morning ladies - 19 weeks today and got my scan Friday
I havnt been feeling much movement I get the odd one now and again but I have to be laid down, with Leo I was getting movments at 14 weeks and solid kicks at 18 weeks, woudl have thought being my third I would have been feeling more by now? Just hope everything is ok at the scan on Friday

This is my first and I am 20 weeks and I do not feel much going on in there either. A few flutters here and there but not frequent. I feel as though I can feel it the most when I am leaning over in a chair. My scan is in a week so I am hoping all is ok!

 

[cheshire]

Wow Feanorous she sounds nuts!

I always think with crazy old people it's often best not to disagree with them or get into too deep a conversation, you can rarely if ever change their minds/opinions anyway and you just might end up making her more determined to attack you. I can understand how those words can hurt, especially when you're pregnant but they are just the words of a crazy old woman!

Leikela when is the scan?

 

[dizzydoll]

Eee!! OH could see my belly move when baby kicked last night
Bubs is kicking like crazy since I started being able to feel it from the outside haha

 

[mel9996]

lil girl is moving like crazy!! saw her move from the outside last nite for the first time. OH put his phone on my bump and was playing music and she kicked it off!! haha it was pretty funny!! sent out all my shower invites yesterday so that is checked off the list!!
new nursing job is kicking my butt but i know the money is gonna help out a lot once she is here!!!
congrats to everybody who found out about their lil cookie's sex!!!
sorry about the crazy cat lady!! sounds like she is just bored!

 

[LittleSienna]

Can i be put down for a pink bump please....Thankyou

x

 

[dizzydoll]

Congrats on your pink bump hun Did you just have the scan recently?

 

[Lady-K]

Anomaly scan this morning. All looking healthy - phew!

I caved. Lucy's going to be having a little

Spoiler

sister!

 

[fifi-folle]

Congrats on the bumps!

12
5
2

 

[cheshire]

Congratulations Lady-K. I'm sure I will cave too, so glad not to be the only one!!

Scans next week might be bringing in some more blue bumps!!

 

[Feanorous]

Morning everyone

Congrats lady K - so exciting. Are you pleased to have another princess?

We had a private gender scan yesterday morning and we definitely have a little girl on our hands. I feel so relieved to know properly now..

Yesterday I also did an inventory of all the clothes I have bought so far and for some reason I have a ton of stuff for 3-6 months and not much at all for newborn! lol.
We still have a lot to get but it's hard to know when the best time is to get more of it. Also, in the shops now is mostly summer clothes and we are having babies in winter!

xx

 

[Leikela]

Leikela when is the scan?

Hi Cheshire! My scan is this coming Thursday on 6/14/12. Hubby will be with me and we are very excited! I was supposed to have it last Thursday but Hubby was out of town for work. The waiting has been killing me but it's almost here!

Anomaly scan this morning. All looking healthy - phew!

I caved. Lucy's going to be having a little

Spoiler

sister!

Aw, congrats Lady-K! A little girl, huh? Nice! I must say I am leaning towards wanting a girl but I will be happy with whatever they tell me!