*October Bumpkins*2014* 43 Babies Born!

[SoBlessedMama]

I haven't been on here lately, but wanted to share -

had my first m/w appt today and heard the HB! such a good sound! have already felt the baby move, but even better to hear the HB>

Great news!!! : )

 

[newlywed2013]

I think I felt baby move today! Felt like something tickling me from the inside!

 

[MamaMac123]

(TMI ALERT): It's been a few days since DH and I have had sex (which for me right now isn't a big deal, ) and he's getting kind of.. shall we say frustrated? Lol. Anyway, last night was kind of rough between us, is he asked if I was just going to fall asleep, he was tossing and turning, sighing a lot, got up and did some random crap on the laptop, got up went into the kitchen in the middle of the night to chop stuff for his and his dad's lunch today. In there somewhere he said that it seems like I just have sex with him just to get him off my back and in some cases that is true... but he just seems to want it so freaking often! Always asking for bj's, etc. But usually once we get into I start enjoying it and getting into it. After a while I decide to get him to sleep I move over to him and get things started and then right in the middle Sam decides he wants to wake up, so we didn't even get to finish! So, naturally this morning he wakes up and gets on to whatever porno website he uses, lol and does his thing that way.. but after he left for work I noticed (he didn't clear the search bar) he had done a search for pregnant with no sex drive. Like there is something wrong with me?! Excuse me for popping out two of your kids and chasing after them and picking up after them, and cleaning the house and cooking your dinner and growing your third child and being too tired to have sex with you every night! How is that supposed to make me feel? I cried quite a bit this morning. Sorry for the ranting novel... I just needed to vent.

Sex stuff can be so frustrating! And it's almost always the case even without pregnancy that one spouse wants it more than the other. In our marriage I'm the one who wants it more often than DH and now I'm pregnant I don't necessarily want it more but it's with more intensity. When I want it I need it RIGHT NOW! drives DH nuts sometimes haha

I've got a suggestion for you though. There is a book that was just recently released called The Bead Method....basically it outlines a way to help bridge the gap between sex drives. You would give your DH a bunch of beads. You tell him each of these beads represents a time you will have sex with him. You have some sort of bowl you keep by the bed. Anytime he wants sex he just drops a bead in your bowl. When he does this you have 24 hours to give him sex. This way you can control part of the "when" and get yourself in the mood without feeling the immediate "do me now" pressure and your DH can relax knowing he will definitely be getting some in the next 24 hours. I haven't read the book but I've heard interviews with the authors discussing the concept and how they came up with it and how well it worked. Might be worth looking into Good luck!

Here's a link to the website for the book:

https://www.thebeadmethod.com

 

[La Mere]

MamaMac- That is interesting! Thanks for the suggestion, I will have to check it out!

 

[mommyberry]

La Mere - You should talk to him about it. Men are really simple creatures... He must be so driven by passion to search for smthing like that... put it out in the open and he will realize it was a stupid thing to do. There is no point of you feeling bad all by yourself and being stressed out about this. This Bead method seems like an awesome idea to work things around this issue.

I know how frustrating it is to see some unexpected search words after DH leaves to work. When we were newly weds, I found out he went to porn websites when I saw his previous searches and it drove me nuts! Well now... it doesn't bother me as much.

Like Mamamac and rbourre - It is the other way round in my marriage. I am the one who seems to be needy all the time (esp in pregnancy). He totally ignores my subtle moves and wants me to verbally tell him when I want to do it. DH is an advocate and is so drained physically and mentally most of the time and I don't want to push him when I know he is not upto it. (Men on the other hand can't be so understanding... as we see) Looks like this beads will work well for us. Thanks for the suggestion Mamamac. I will surely check it out.

20 week scan on 23rd May. Seems like forever!

 

[CharlieKeys]

We usually have equal sex drive to be honest ... But right now it's so exhausting looking after a house, nursery runs twice a week, baby groups, food shops, washing, cooking, And running around after 3 that when it comes to sexy time I have NO energy left. It's okay when we get going but leading up to that point is like Urgh do we have too?

 

[CharmedKirsty]

By son is not a great sleeper. He often does not go to sleep until late and does not always nap and add work into the mix. so it not that we don't want too but the opportunity is not always there.

 

[rbourre]

I'm feeling a bit crampy this morning. Something must be stretching in there. I do remember having some cramps when pregnant with my daughter.

I have my first OB appointment tomorrow. Until now, I just saw my family doctor. He wants me to see an OB because of my history of pre-eclampsia and a premature birth.

 

[CharlieKeys]

Aww At least they're being careful -will you need extra monitoring?

 

[rbourre]

Toward the end, I assume so. More than likely I will have to have ultrasounds to check on growth since my daughter was IUGR. I hope I don't have to go to the OB too often, his office is an hour away.

 

[staceymxxx]

16th april is my next midwife appt, 3rd of may is my private scan, 21st of may is nhs scan then on the 11th july i have the glucose test.. tired just thinking about it all lol!

 

[MamaMac123]

La Mere - You should talk to him about it. Men are really simple creatures... He must be so driven by passion to search for smthing like that... put it out in the open and he will realize it was a stupid thing to do. There is no point of you feeling bad all by yourself and being stressed out about this. This Bead method seems like an awesome idea to work things around this issue.

I know how frustrating it is to see some unexpected search words after DH leaves to work. When we were newly weds, I found out he went to porn websites when I saw his previous searches and it drove me nuts! Well now... it doesn't bother me as much.

Like Mamamac and rbourre - It is the other way round in my marriage. I am the one who seems to be needy all the time (esp in pregnancy). He totally ignores my subtle moves and wants me to verbally tell him when I want to do it. DH is an advocate and is so drained physically and mentally most of the time and I don't want to push him when I know he is not upto it. (Men on the other hand can't be so understanding... as we see) Looks like this beads will work well for us. Thanks for the suggestion Mamamac. I will surely check it out.

20 week scan on 23rd May. Seems like forever!

You're welcome hope it's helpful! I thought it sounded like a cool idea. But we've worked our stuff out enough that I don't think we need it. In the beginning though this would have been great! For us, in the beginning of our marriage it was a big issue. I wanted sex a lot more than my hubby did and I'd get all hurt and upset if he didn't catch on to my hints and advances or when I was always the one initiating sex. Felt like I wasn't good enough to hold his interest or something. But eventually I came to realize it's not an issue he has with me it's just who we are. My sex drive is higher than his, that's it. He's 8 years older than me and I waited till marriage for sex while my hubby had been married before an having sex for years. It was pretty normal that I'd want it more than him. When I finally just accepted that fact things got a thousand times better for us. Now I don't stress that I'm usually the one to initiate sex. DH is always really good about giving me what I need and I don't hint about it. I'll just tell him when I get home from work "Babe, I want sex tonight, k?" So he knows early on that he better not sit up on the computer or watching tv too late and better get his butt to bed. Works for us and I almost always get sex when I want/need it. Guys aren't so good with the subtle hints lol

Another little suggestion just in general for marriage...just because I love it and it's made a huge difference for me specifically in my marriage. There is this guy Mark Gungor (he's actually where I heard about the bead method) and he does a seminar called Laugh Your Way To A Better Marriage. He's a Christian pastor so there's a bit of religious talk involved but mostly he's just hilarious and gives some great relationship advice for how men and women operate and think and how to understand each other better. You can find the seminar sessions on YouTube. They are fantastic and really changed my understanding of how men think and how we as women think and how to use that knowledge to understand and communicate with each other without all the petty arguments and resentments. Totally recommend it if anyone is interested.....improved my marriage so much!

 

[MamaMac123]

We usually have equal sex drive to be honest ... But right now it's so exhausting looking after a house, nursery runs twice a week, baby groups, food shops, washing, cooking, And running around after 3 that when it comes to sexy time I have NO energy left. It's okay when we get going but leading up to that point is like Urgh do we have too?

That's where the bead thing could be really helpful I bet because you'd have some notice to get ready for it

Pregnancy is just so exhausting though! Honestly men do not understand this kind of tired! That's been the biggest issue for me is just how dang tired I am all the time. Hopefully once we all hit second trimester we'll get some energy back! Only a couple more weeks for me! :happy dance:

 

[MamaMac123]

I'm feeling a bit crampy this morning. Something must be stretching in there. I do remember having some cramps when pregnant with my daughter.

I have my first OB appointment tomorrow. Until now, I just saw my family doctor. He wants me to see an OB because of my history of pre-eclampsia and a premature birth.

Good luck! Hope all goes well!

 

[MamaMac123]

11 Weeks Today!!!! Two little limes in there! Every week that goes by makes me so happy! One week closer! Only two weeks till second trimester! I want some energy back! Lol

Next midwife appointment in just under 3 weeks and next scan May 7th. Think I'm going to book a private 3D scan for week 20 when my mom is visiting for our gender scan. Might call today feeling excited!!!

Some other twin moms informed me they had to quit working as early as 20 weeks with twins. Yikes! I wasn't expecting that soon! Now I'm a bit worried about how soon I'll need to quit. We really need my pay as long as possible. Hopefully I can go longer than that! Though I'd love an excuse to stay home and relax all day! Haha

 

[kel21]

My little monkey is hiding again Last time I couldn't find it, it had moved up and over. I tried going up and over this time but still couldn't find it! Fxd I can find it this afternoon, it always worries me when I can't, even though I know I'm not supposed to. Lol

 

[Jcliff]

Prenatal massage today so excitedddddd grandma watching DD

 

[Yo_Yo]

11 Weeks Today!!!! Two little limes in there! Every week that goes by makes me so happy! One week closer! Only two weeks till second trimester! I want some energy back! Lol

Next midwife appointment in just under 3 weeks and next scan May 7th. Think I'm going to book a private 3D scan for week 20 when my mom is visiting for our gender scan. Might call today feeling excited!!!

Some other twin moms informed me they had to quit working as early as 20 weeks with twins. Yikes! I wasn't expecting that soon! Now I'm a bit worried about how soon I'll need to quit. We really need my pay as long as possible. Hopefully I can go longer than that! Though I'd love an excuse to stay home and relax all day! Haha

Happy 11 weeks!

Kel21-drink lots of water-will help push the womb up so you can find baby easier-they seem to like hiding! don't worry

Jcliff-prenatal massage sounds wonderful! Enjoy your pampering honey.

 

[Yo_Yo]

I'm feeling a bit crampy this morning. Something must be stretching in there. I do remember having some cramps when pregnant with my daughter.

I have my first OB appointment tomorrow. Until now, I just saw my family doctor. He wants me to see an OB because of my history of pre-eclampsia and a premature birth.

Hope the cramps go soon lovely it's good your getting an extra close eye kept on you after having a premmie. Drink plenty of water, as it eases cramps

 

[CharlieKeys]

Mamamac - I know of a few twin mums who worked up until 30ish weeks. It's doable I think, but only if you are feeling okay. The minute you start to feel like you can't do it anymore - then you will know that's your time to go on maternity