**OK well Im dipping my feet in....after My son Max died on 13th Oct...@25+4w**

[Early_Bump]

OK....

So im Emma I'm 25yrs old and im married to my best friend terry who is 23....we have had 8 children already but sadly we have 3 angels...

kate now 9ys born @33wks
jak now 7yrs born at 28wks
kyle now 5 born @27wks
Tj now 4yrs born @ 25+6wks
Lily-Mae now 21months born @ 25+5

Angel....

Harry born sleeping @22wks 2000
Ella-lou Born @ 24+3 in april 2007 died after 5hrs 8minutes...

Our most recent is our beautiful little boy Max he was born on @ 25+4 on 13th oct and sadly fell asleep after just 2hrs 13mins....

IM missing max so much right now its unreal he was just buried last thurs... but the ache for a baby is huge... thier was huge mistakes made in my last pregnancy that right now i dont have the strength to go into... but all i will say is that it was written in my notes at 8wks and 11wks by consutant that i needed weekly cervical scans at review for a stitch at 18wks... i didnt get any of the scans and i made an offical complaint at 18+5wks... they then arranged a scan for 2 days later but my waters broke 30mins before the scan appointment.... nothing could then be done...

I have seeked advice from manchester and they are reviewing me... and are hopeful that with a stitch in my cervix and pessarys i can get to term well 38wks... but sadly i took the decision to have my tubes cut in theata when goign to ahve Max i honestly didnt expect him to die... so now i'm having to go downt he reveresal route or the ivf route not sure which one yet or if i can either but im looking into it all all i have emtpy arms that ache for a baby...

So thats it any adivce greatly appricated ive been in touch with london womans unit about ivf and i would consider egg share since it reduces the cost so much but i'd need too lose 2stone for that... the reversal i have a consultant who is prepared to see me at a private clinic in manchester spires hospital.. when im ready but it would be 3month before he could do me if i can done.

Im sueing the hosptial thou thats keeping me busy at the moment... grief is a horrible thing but im trying my hardest to get through it, you might all think m insane but pls dont judge me if u havnt walked in my shoes, i love my children very much...for me its more about keeping my options open and seeing if anything can be done bcos theirs a good chance nothing can be done as ive had 7 c-sections and if thats the case then thats fine but then at least i can close the door and move on...

Thanks for listening xxxx

 

[xpatchx]

Hi Emma. I'm so glad you're trying to come back into the game. Max was beautiful, and I was heartbroken when I found outm, as I had been watching you quietly for a while.
Good luck honey. It doesn't matter how many children you have, if you have the longing for another, all the love in the world for those children won't stop that.

Keep fighting! You'll get there!!

Lots of love x x x x

 

[bek74]

Hi Emma, I am so sorry for your losses , I know how it feels to have that longing for another child (not due to loss though).
I am 35yrs (nearly 36) I have 3 sons aged 12 (13 in Dec), 11 and 9. After my third I had my tubes clamped and regretted it almost straight away, but with 3 boys under 4 I pushed it aside and got busy being a mum. In feb 2007 I had my tubes reversed, unfortunatly no luck conceiving, I had heaps of tests and then went back into theatre Feb this year and it showed my right tube is closed but left was open (FS thinks it may be open to dye but not an egg). Well with still no luck and age going against me, hubby and I are now on our 1st IVF cycle.

My advise would be the quicker you can reverse your tubes the better success you will have, I would recommend going to a FS who also does microsurgery, that would give you the best possible chance.

When I told people hubby and I were thinking of IVF, that we wanted more children. The amount of negitive feedback we got was rubbish. Only about 3 of my closest friends (and this forum, lol) know we are going through IVF, I only wanted positive feedback and support so only told those I knew who would understand me.

I wish you all the very best