Over 35 and first pregnancy?

[AngelUK]

I don't get that reaction. 35 is not being in your dotage! I know countless of families who continue having babies into their mid 30s or even 40s. Yeah the risks for Downs increase at 35 but let us face it, the increase from 34 to 35 is not that huge. So does your friend now that she is so old give up on the idea of having kids? How sad. I am 41 and I am expecting twins and so far all is fine. My SIL was over 40 when she had her first and went on to have twin boys later. All three of them are healthy. My friend had her first at 39 and her second at 41. Another friend had her first at 36 and her second at 39. Both are healthy. I could go on with this list as I know so many ppl who started their family after 35 with never a problem at all. And please also remember that in the days before the pill it was completely normal for women to have babies throughout their 30s and even into their 40s. There was an article linked here somewhere that even mentioned that Darwin's wife gave birth to their last child aged 49. Please do not drive yourself crazy with worry and maybe just maybe your friend is just a lil jealous? Good luck to you and h&h 9 months xxx

 

[Borboleta]

I just love this thread. It is so nice to see all of us ladies over 35 having our first babies. I am 38 and hubby will be 42 when our baby boy comes in February. My mom was 37 when she had me and 38 when she had my sister. So I am going right along with her. God bless us older moms.

 

[CeeDee]

MillandRox, I totally agree with AngelUK. There are risks with every pregnancy. I think the over 35 myth has really been blown out of proportion. A lot of younger moms assume they’ll have a healthy baby and a lot of older moms worry for nothing. Both of my grandmothers had children well past 35 and they were all healthy.

 

[Jax41]

Sorry, I'm a TTC stalker but I just wanted to say congratulations to all of you, thank you for letting me read your thread and giving me hope to never let go of my dream to be a Mummy!!!

 

[Sunshine12]

Hello,
I told one of my close friends today about my good news, she was very happy for me but then started talking about how she would be worried and would panic if she was pregnant as she is 35 (i'm also 35!) and all the scarey risks associated with it. Anyway for some reason the conversation has stayed with me and i dont seem to be bale to shake it off. I knew about the risks before but thought the chances are actually quite low of having issues with baby. I know the risks increase as you get older but they are still quite low.

Commments, thoughts please. I need some input on this.

Thanks
MillandRox

Jeez if that was my close friend I would seriously be reconsidering her status! What a stupid thing to say to someone. Anyway, whilst the statistics suggests that risks go up at 35 its not something I would worry myself about if I were you and you are still more than likely to have a healthy pregnancy.xx

 

[Sunshine12]

Sorry, I'm a TTC stalker but I just wanted to say congratulations to all of you, thank you for letting me read your thread and giving me hope to never let go of my dream to be a Mummy!!!

FX'd for you hun. xx

 

[rebecca_mom2b]

I am new to the site. I am 37 and will be 38 when I deliver my first! I am almost 8 weeks along after 12 years of trying. I am not thinking of the possible problems. We are not doing any invasive testing, just the NT and level II ultrasound.

Happy to be here, finally!

 

[CeeDee]

Happy to have you rebecca_mom2b! H&H 9 months!

 

[MillandRox]

Hello ladies,
I hope everyone is well and enjoying your pregnancies so far! I am a 3rd year student midwife from Edinburgh, Scotland and have joined this forum for some help! I hope you won't be annoyed I have joined but I have to make a poster and leaflet regarding 'Mothers over 35'. I was wondering if any of you have any stories in the way you have been treated. Have there been any prejudice/discrimination against you because you are older? It is mainly aimed at first time mum's but if any of you have a story I would love to hear it so I can develop a theme. My poster will most likely be aimed at Midwives to inform them about care and management for women over 35. Please help if you can. Thank you!!!
Melanie

Hi there, would love to help. I'm very early on in my journey (just over 6 weeks) but i'll keep you updated. Are you mainly intersted from a a prespective of how we are treated by the Health care proffesionals or wider than that. Let me know and i will keep it in mind as i go through my journey and feedback to you.

Best of luck with your studies.

 

[MillandRox]

I don't get that reaction. 35 is not being in your dotage! I know countless of families who continue having babies into their mid 30s or even 40s. Yeah the risks for Downs increase at 35 but let us face it, the increase from 34 to 35 is not that huge. So does your friend now that she is so old give up on the idea of having kids? How sad. I am 41 and I am expecting twins and so far all is fine. My SIL was over 40 when she had her first and went on to have twin boys later. All three of them are healthy. My friend had her first at 39 and her second at 41. Another friend had her first at 36 and her second at 39. Both are healthy. I could go on with this list as I know so many ppl who started their family after 35 with never a problem at all. And please also remember that in the days before the pill it was completely normal for women to have babies throughout their 30s and even into their 40s. There was an article linked here somewhere that even mentioned that Darwin's wife gave birth to their last child aged 49. Please do not drive yourself crazy with worry and maybe just maybe your friend is just a lil jealous? Good luck to you and h&h 9 months xxx

Hello, thank you for helping try to put my mond at ease. I agree with everything you have said. Thinking about it, she was happy for me but not as excited as i expected her to be. Also she did say that maybe she aught to get pregnant too. I think it was a shock to her and was not expecting it and reacted in a way that came right away. It's fine she is entitled to think what she wants but i dont think i will talk to her about this subject unless she brings it up as i dont want to end up feeling that way again.

Thanks again for your comforting comments. I really appreciate it.

 

[MillandRox]

MillandRox, I totally agree with AngelUK. There are risks with every pregnancy. I think the over 35 myth has really been blown out of proportion. A lot of younger moms assume they’ll have a healthy baby and a lot of older moms worry for nothing. Both of my grandmothers had children well past 35 and they were all healthy.

Yes, i do think they are blow out of proportion. I want to do some research on line on this subject just to stop all this worry for me or anyone else who gets this issue on their mind. I'll share what i find on here.

 

[MillandRox]

Hello,
I told one of my close friends today about my good news, she was very happy for me but then started talking about how she would be worried and would panic if she was pregnant as she is 35 (i'm also 35!) and all the scarey risks associated with it. Anyway for some reason the conversation has stayed with me and i dont seem to be bale to shake it off. I knew about the risks before but thought the chances are actually quite low of having issues with baby. I know the risks increase as you get older but they are still quite low.

Commments, thoughts please. I need some input on this.

Thanks
MillandRox

Jeez if that was my close friend I would seriously be reconsidering her status! What a stupid thing to say to someone. Anyway, whilst the statistics suggests that risks go up at 35 its not something I would worry myself about if I were you and you are still more than likely to have a healthy pregnancy.xx

Hi sunshine12 - i think i will put her reaction down to her own worries and neurosis but if it happens again and i feel she is doind it on purpose then i will certainly start to think about if she is a good friend.

 

[Conina]

Hi all can I join you? I've just found out I'm expecting my first. DH is 36, I'm turning 36 next month (holding on to 35 like grim death!!)

I have my first dr appointment on Monday so we'll see what he says then.

H&H 9 months everyone!!

 

[AngelUK]

Welcome and h&h 9 months

 

[CeeDee]

Congrats Conina!

 

[peacebaby]

hi all
hoping to join you all...am 37, 38 in the new year and cautiously expecting our first after an MC in April. good to have our own 35+ cosy place on forum.
Trying to stay calm as I had an early scan today, mainly to rule out ectopic but the sonographer was rather negative saying all she could see was a gestational sac & a yolk and that it should be embryo with a pole according to my LMP(5wk6days). So am due for yet another scan in 2 weeks time..it's going to be a long wait!

wishing everyone a H&H 9 mnths

 

[Borboleta]

Going to be cheering for you and your baby peace baby. Hope the next 2 weeks go by really fast. God bless you both.

 

[AngelUK]

Welcome and good luck peacebaby!

 

[Torontogal]

Welcome Conina and Peacebaby!
Peacebaby, good luck on your scan in two weeks. You were probably just a lil' early.

 

[peacebaby]

thanks everyone, your prayers and wishes mean so much

Torontogal that's what dh & I thought too and we're hoping so. The lady really spooked us, I was feeling so positive until then. Started progesterone supps tonight and am hoping the few days of low progesterone didn't cause a problem. If I had my way I really wouldn't opt for an early scan, it causes more stress than necessary. Just trying too keep distracted for the next 2 weeks, lol.

hoping you're all doing good