Please help....Now a single mum.

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - First Trimester' started by Bee26, Sep 2, 2009.

  1. Bee26

    Bee26 Mummy to Charlie bear!

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    well, today been an emotional one!! I have asked my partner, the father of my baby to leave. There are many reasons for this and I know I've made the right choice but he's demanding I have a termination. I don't want to and don't think I could go through with it even if I did but I do feel bad for him. He really doesn't want a child from a broken relationship as he has a child he doesn't see already. Surely it's my choice though, right?
     
  2. hopeforamirac

    hopeforamirac Well-Known Member

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    if you dont want one dont have one.
    its your choice nobody else's if he wants to be part of the babys life im sure you can sort something out :hugs:
     
  3. flumpy

    flumpy Well-Known Member

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    aww hun, so sorry to hear you and your OH have split, but please do not let this affect your decision - you are right it is YOUR decision, its sad that he will have another child from a broken relationship but by no means is it a reason to get rid of it - stick to your guns!! xxx
     
  4. AlwaysPraying

    AlwaysPraying Mom of two!

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    The choice has already been made equally by the two of you. You've conceived!

    I think you should tell him (if this is true, I'm not sure). that there are many different ways to have families these days. Mom and dad doesn't have to be together. He does have a right to be in babies life (I believe) and if you share that, then the two of you can work together to make it happen well, for the three of you.

    That baby will always be there, abortion or birth, please know that. Because of this conception, you will always be connected.

    It's a long road and the baby needs his / her family to support their tiny lives. Sounds like the choice was yours to leave, so perhaps keeping a door for dad open will help to smooth the upcoming process out.
     
  5. fizz63

    fizz63 Well-Known Member

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    I am going through a similar situation to you ... though it is my oh that has told me he wants to end the relationship. He didnt really want this baby in the first place and i am very cross with him that he has agreed to try for a baby for the last few months, if he was doubting our relationship.

    I have been desperate for a baby for many years now and although he would probably be alot happier if i had a termination, this is not an option for me at all. He has said he doesnt want anything to do with this baby (or me) which after 14 years together is very very hard to accept, but i know i am doing the right thing. I am sure it will be difficult especially if he does decide he wants to pop in and out of the babys life but i think I just have to stay strong and deal with each day as it comes. I feel bad that now he says he doesnt want this child and that he will have to pay maintenance for the next 18 years but at the end of the day, he agreed to conceiving this child and therefore that really is his worry and not mine. :hugs:
     
  6. fizz63

    fizz63 Well-Known Member

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    By the way did you know there is a "single mums" thread on here.
     
  7. Rach27

    Rach27 Well-Known Member

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    Geez there are some shits out there. Do what you know in your heart is right. He is thinking of himself not you or the bubba.
     
  8. lauraperrysan

    lauraperrysan Mummy of 2!! :)

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    i dont mean to sound rude but why has it taken you to get pregnant to decide you want to leave him? i dont agree with abortion but yes it is your choice but he's still the daddy...however never let anyone push you into something you dont want to do, especially a termination...it's your little baby too xxx
     
  9. shocker

    shocker Well-Known Member

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    Im sorry your having a tough time hun, dont let him pressure you into anything and make your decision based on what you want.I've had to do the same today aswell the bf has decided he doesnt want to be a father and is freaking out being horrible so its all over.You decide whats right for you and dont worry.Theres always gonna be rain before a rainbow :hugs:
     
  10. vixta

    vixta Well-Known Member

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    trust me on this..... never have a termination if its not what you want! it will haunt you for the rest of your life ~x~
     
  11. Bee26

    Bee26 Mummy to Charlie bear!

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    The pregNancy was unplanned, but were both so happy when we found out. He doesn't have a job, while I have a good career, he lays in bed till lunchtime while I search for work for him. He is good to me, and cleans and cooks for me but I cant afford to support him and a baby. He says I should give him a chance to prove himself but I feel emotionally drained and exhausted. X x
     

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