practical advice for 2 under 2

[1eighty]

looking for advice here as DS will be approx 19m when the minion arrives. can't see much with a cursory search, so if there is another resource on b&b, please point me to it!

thanks

 

[Glitter1]

Hi hun! I have 14 months between mine - what advice are you after? X

 

[SarahP13]

Well firstly, congrats!

My two are 21 months apart and I love it. At times it is hard but I wouldn't have it any other way. The first few months are hard (particularly as I breastfed and DH worked away a lot) but watching their bond develop has been great. They adore each other.

Some advice:
I bought DD1 a doll and accessories so she could play babies alongside me.
We read a couple of books about getting a new sister.
Get baby stuff out well before LO arrives so toddler can get used to it.
Try to get toddler into a routine that you think will work for you once baby arrives and make sure you don't plan any big changes shortly after baby arrives (dropping nap, potty training, big bed, starting nursery etc)
Prepare a basket in/near the main living area (if you don't already have one) with nappies, wipes, change mag and spare baby clothes so you don't have to keep running upstairs.
Have a box of 'feeding toys', a box with special things in to occupy toddler while you're feeding baby.
Line up family and friends to take toddler off your hands for an hour or so every now and then so they get a special treat and you get quiet time with baby.
Find some clubs that you can take both to so you get out of the house and toddler is entertained.

My biggest piece if advice though? Relax!!! It's not necessarily going to be as difficult as you might imagine and you'll get through it one way or another .

 

[1eighty]

it's literally the logistics of it all, especially in the first few weeks. i know i have to make the most of DH's paternity, so is there anything he can do in particular that will help him, me, us?? i'd like to get my dad involved with DS a little more so that there is time for DH and i to get some alone time with bub, more DH than me tbh (but not leaving him alone alone, iykwim?) urm....

good tip about the big changes thing - i'm probably going to move DS to a big bed around the 16mth mark so he's got time to get used to the idea! i'll move the cot back into our room (gosh, it's gonna be odd seeing that raised back up again) and set up the changing area there too so that i can toddler-proof DS's room. i had a changing kit downstairs when he was first born, i was basically living on the sofa because of the stitches (forceps delivery, ouchies), that was a lifesaver.

i'm already making use of my freezer so that there are a stash of home made "ready meals" so that i don't have to cook, haha!

what am i forgetting?

 

[Eleanor ace]

You'll quickly fall into a routine that works for you, and suits your LO's needs.
For example, bathtime and bedtime. I bath the children together. I take DD's clothes, nappy etc in there. I get her out first and DS has a splash around while I get DD dressed and giver her a little feed to calm her down (she hates getting dressed). Then I get DS out and get him dressed while DD plays on her mat. Then I put them both in DS's bed and read them a story together. If she fusses I feed her while reading to DS. We've been doing this since DD was a week old. Then I say night night to DS and take DD to our room to feed and put down to sleep (DD's 5 months, when she was littler I'd take her back downstairs as she didn't have a bedtime).
However some of my friends with 2 under 2 waited until their OH's were home from work and did bath time/bed time for the children separately and that worked for them.
So basically I'd suggest going with the flow, seeing what works for you and adapting your routine to fit both children's needs.
Also, the path of least resistance- take it! .

 

[joeyjo]

My gap was a bit bigger but the most useful thing was a decent sling (stretchy wrap in the early days and later my connecta).