Rant - Feeling so hopeless about sleep!

[Noelle610]

WOW, that's so amazing, Jessica! It seems like just yesterday Lilly was up half a dozen times a night, and now she's sleeping over 13 hours straight! The couple of times Elsie slept through it was "only" for 10 hours.

I know! And it's really surprised me because while we were home in Texas her sleep was HORRIBLE!! And just as soon as we got home, BAM! Sleeping through the night, it came out of nowhere! I honestly thought we'd never get here. I still don't know if it's going to be a regular thing, I'm just waiting for the day when she's back to waking every few hours. I can't imagine her sleeping through from here on out.

I feel kinda bad posting that she's sleeping through the night, because a lot of the ladies on here, including you, aren't having the best of nights lately..

Don't feel guilty. This kind of stuff used to give me so much hope. To think that a baby could wake every couple of hours and then magically start STTN is wonderful!

 

[Aimee1003]

Yes. Hope!!!!! I need hope! I remember the last night Coleton sttn. It was Oct 14th. Sigh...So long ago. Colds, sleep regression, RSV, separation anxiety, now teething...it just keeps on and on.

I do a lot of research in my job and it kinds bleeds over to my personal life. All that to explain why I know these random numbers... At 6 months babies "should "get 10-11 hrs of nighttime sleep and 3-4 hrs of naps. At 9 months the average is 11-12 hrs of nighttime sleep and 2-3 hours of naps so it sounds like many of your babies are right on track.

I also posted a thread a few days ago citing a research study where of 640 six month olds only 16% sttn on a regular basis. This study makes me feel better.

Bananaz- I bet u are right about the missed meals causing the wakeups. Coleton has been wanting a 4-4:30 nap recently. I have just been holding him and he wakes up after 20-30 min. Seems like he only really needs a catnap then. Of course I am back at work today so can't do that anymore.

Shadowy- I am sleeping on the floor in LOs bedroom at the moment because his room is on the other side of the house and the damn monitor wakes me up with every noise and since little man is up so much anyway.... I too miss my husband!

So LO was up every 2 hrs last night. I am at work (pumping now) and am so exhausted. However I really think the wakeups are teething related. If so, that means it has been going on for 2 weeks. How long do u think b4 the tooth actually appears?

 

[Noelle610]

Aimee, our first tooth took weeks to appear! Usually the bottom ones are first to come in... can you see the outline on the front of the gums? Typically that shows you're they're coming. If it helps, the second popped through with much less trouble.

 

[Boo44]

Wow Jessica that is amazing! I am so happy for you! What have you changed recently? How many oz of formula does Lilly usually have a day?

Like a PP said my Jack literally never does that. Even if he sttn I always hear him at least once and he usually wakes by 6.30 or 7 latest

 

[jessicatunnel]

Wow Jessica that is amazing! I am so happy for you! What have you changed recently? How many oz of formula does Lilly usually have a day?

Like a PP said my Jack literally never does that. Even if he sttn I always hear him at least once and he usually wakes by 6.30 or 7 latest

We shut her door and crack ours and turn the baby monitor off so if she wakes up and is re positioning herself I don't hear her, but the minute she cries I can hear her and go in there. When she first STTN I thought she must have cried and I just didn't hear her, but there's no way that could happen because her room is only right across the hall from ours and her cries are pretty loud, haha.

I haven't changed a thing either. I just play with her until she's tired and then bathe her. After her bath she gets ultra tired and falls asleep as soon as the bottle hits her mouth.
She's not a huge eater and has about 18 oz a day and sometimes has baby food or whatever we're eating but she is STILL not very interested in food yet.

 

[Boo44]

Wow Jessica that is amazing! I am so happy for you! What have you changed recently? How many oz of formula does Lilly usually have a day?

Like a PP said my Jack literally never does that. Even if he sttn I always hear him at least once and he usually wakes by 6.30 or 7 latest

We shut her door and crack ours and turn the baby monitor off so if she wakes up and is re positioning herself I don't hear her, but the minute she cries I can hear her and go in there. When she first STTN I thought she must have cried and I just didn't hear her, but there's no way that could happen because her room is only right across the hall from ours and her cries are pretty loud, haha.

I haven't changed a thing either. I just play with her until she's tired and then bathe her. After her bath she gets ultra tired and falls asleep as soon as the bottle hits her mouth.
She's not a huge eater and has about 18 oz a day and sometimes has baby food or whatever we're eating but she is STILL not very interested in food yet.

Fab! She was obviously just ready for sttn what a star!

We don't use a monitor either, just leave his door open and push ours almost shut. I still hear him breathing I think it must be mother's instinct as OH passes right out haha

 

[lysh]

So nice to hear that STTN can actually happen! lol Congrats Jessica!!

My LO still is waking up twice a night- we had a pretty bad regression for about a week and now we are back to the twice a night pattern. It is still hard with the timing of it though...she goes to bed between 6:30-7, wakes up between 10:30-11 (I go to bed between 8:30-9- earliest I can do it as I have tons of school work to do at night), wakes up again around 2-2:30 and then again between 4:30-5 (she is then up for the day). So I am still not really getting any long stretches of sleep. I wish she would at least sleep until 5:30 which is when I would have to get up on workdays.

I see there are a lot of teething questions! I am not an expert as my LO only sprouted her two bottom front teeth, but I noticed that she was showing signs of teething for a while....however, all of a sudden she was crankier than usual during the day and at night for about 2-3 days, and then we saw her first tooth pop out!!! Her second one came within a week of the first.

 

[libbylou]

The rest of our night was rubbish too. LO was up every hour in her crib until I moved her to our bed and she was so restless there that I hardly got any sleep. Moved her back to her crib at around 6am...took her almost an hour to settle to sleep, then between 7am and 8:30am when she woke up for the day she was waking constantly and making just enough noise to wake me up
Unfortunately we can't leave our doors open and go monitorless because we have two cats and one of the stupid jerks (unknown which one) started pissing on furniture when LO was born and I don't want my mattress pissed on again. Plus they're really loud and disruptive at night so letting them in either room would not be a good plan

Jessica - that is so awesome that Lilly is sleeping through! Gives me hope!

The longest stretch LO has done is 8 hours and that was once at 6 months. She's done 5 hours maybe like 3 times.

Noelle - could be a growth spurt? My LO sleeps a crazy amount (short periods of course) when she has a growth spurt

Irish - glad to see you caught the ear infection, hopefully LO will start feeling better now and better sleep will follow!
I've actually heard from a few people (pediatrician, sleep consultant, etc) that a baby's sleep can be affected by how their parent sleeps. In which case LO should theoretically sleep like a log

Bananaz - geez, sorry you guys had a bad night too

shadowy - sounds like it's time to transition out of the swaddle. Hopefully it won't be too miserable of a transition for you guys!

aimee - LO was sleeping great (after sleep training) until she started teething...her teething definitely affected her sleep in a serious way. Hope it gets better for you soon, can't imagine how hard it is to function at work on so little sleep. I can barely get out of my PJs some days

 

[lysh]

The rest of our night was rubbish too. LO was up every hour in her crib until I moved her to our bed and she was so restless there that I hardly got any sleep. Moved her back to her crib at around 6am...took her almost an hour to settle to sleep, then between 7am and 8:30am when she woke up for the day she was waking constantly and making just enough noise to wake me up
Unfortunately we can't leave our doors open and go monitorless because we have two cats and one of the stupid jerks (unknown which one) started pissing on furniture when LO was born and I don't want my mattress pissed on again. Plus they're really loud and disruptive at night so letting them in either room would not be a good plan

Sorry Libby- I think it is disheartening to go through the sleep training to have it all go down the tubes. I don't know about you, but I am finding it hard to want to go through that again! I have a cat too....love my kitty, but sometimes it is frustrating to deal with him waking us up on top of LO. He does not sleep in the room with us anymore (we have to close our doors and LOs because of our kitty too- we have to keep the monitor on) but he will get in these moods where he will MEOW and MEOW and MEOW.

BTW Aimmee- Do you find pumping at work as a teacher to be challenging??? It is killing me this year- plus I am in a new position (you know how hectic it is learning a curriculum). I spend half of my lunch and prep pumping. It is hard working/pumping/keeping up with everything while sleep deprived!

 

[ntlnnk]

My girl is 14 weeks and steel wakes up almost every 2 hours at night. I hope she will sleep better soon.

 

[bananaz]

The rest of our night was rubbish too. LO was up every hour in her crib until I moved her to our bed and she was so restless there that I hardly got any sleep. Moved her back to her crib at around 6am...took her almost an hour to settle to sleep, then between 7am and 8:30am when she woke up for the day she was waking constantly and making just enough noise to wake me up
Unfortunately we can't leave our doors open and go monitorless because we have two cats and one of the stupid jerks (unknown which one) started pissing on furniture when LO was born and I don't want my mattress pissed on again. Plus they're really loud and disruptive at night so letting them in either room would not be a good plan

Sorry to hear you had a tough night My cats are a pain at night too. Every evening I have to lock them and their litterbox in the kitchen because a few months ago they decided that the baby was responsible for feeding them breakfast so they started meowing really loudly at her door at 4am. I almost murdered them.

I actually still sleep with both my and LO's bedroom doors closed and no monitor, though. We have a small house and that kid is LOUD. I hear her no problem, even with white noise on.

 

[lysh]

Sorry to hear you had a tough night My cats are a pain at night too. Every evening I have to lock them and their litterbox in the kitchen because a few months ago they decided that the baby was responsible for feeding them breakfast so they started meowing really loudly at her door at 4am. I almost murdered them.

lol....I have felt that way about my cat on occasion. Especially when meowing is not enough and he decides to run around like his tail is on fire and all I hear from my bed is 'thump, thump, thump' and he runs up and down the stairs and back and forth in the hallway. Oh....and my cat opens drawers. I once forgot to close the guest room door and he got in and started pulling open draws...so all I hear are these loud bangs as the draws come flying open......of course this is the wall connected to the baby's room!!!! When he does this, I am awake and tense and waiting to hear LO scream. (either that or my eyes are peeled on the monitor waiting to see if she starts moving which will lead to crying).

Well, my 'free time' is about up! Nice to catch up and touch base every now and then between the insanity I call life at the moment!

 

[BabyBumpLove]

Hello ladies,
Can I join? I am also the mother of a sweet baby that DOES NOT come close to sttn! I live in a constant sleepy state. My son is 5 months old and I was sure I would be sleeping a lot more than I am by now. I feel like I have tried everything! I am very hopeful that someday soon my sweet baby will give his mommy a break!

 

[Stellae]

I've got a 5.5 mo too and his nighttime sleep was really degrading too. We figured out he was napping too long during the day- 4 hours total. That doesn't sound like much but he wanted to go to bed at 7 pm and sleep until 8 am, and he was just too wakeful. When we cut his morning and evening naps to half an hour and only let him sleep an hour and a half tops for his midday nap it improved a lot. I know waking up LO from a peaceful nap is the last thing you probably want to do, especially since you really need the break, but it might help!

 

[Noelle610]

Welcome BabyBump, sorry you are here!

Stellae, my LO actually tends to sleep better at night if she has good naps... but 4 hours does seem like a lot of daytime sleep! I tihnk 3 hours is ideal for us.

Yesterday was GREAT for us. Charlotte had wonderful naps (9:00am-10:30am and 1:30pm-3:00pm) and then STTN 12 hours from 6:30pm-6:30am. Is 7 months our time for sleep? Knock on wood! Just enjoying it while it lasts.... until the next illness/tooth/sleep regression.

 

[bananaz]

BabyBumpLove - Sorry to hear things are so rough, I know what you mean about expecting more sleep at this age!

Noelle - Hooray! So happy for you! And so so jealous, haha. Have you done anything differently or is this just because she finally doesn't have any illness or developmental thing going on?


Yesterday was good for us in that her naps were finally back on track, with a 1-hour nap in the more and a glorious 2-hour nap in the afternoon (it's crazy how long 2 hours feels now! I got so much done).

Unfortunately last night was awful. Her pattern of wakings was almost identical to the night before's, except she went to bed on time so she didn't have the nice long stretch in the beginning. WTF happened? A week ago she was doing 7-10 hour stretches and now she won't even do 4 hours in a row? Perhaps not coincidentally, in the past couple of days she's started refusing almost all solids. I don't know why or what to do about that though.

I feel like I must be doing something wrong here. At a certain point isn't it supposed to get better and stay that way, at least for a while?

 

[Noelle610]

Bananaz, I'm truly not sure. I think it's a combination of things. The night weaning helped, as she no longer wakes for feeds. And then I think it's just the perfect storm of no illness/teething/milestones or what have you. Charlotte's really sensitive to those things, so I'm not confident this pattern will continue.

Wow, a 2 hour afternoon nap?! How lovely. I adore those, especially on the weekends. I'm sorry your night was rough. Charlotte goes through periods of refusing solids and I do actually notice a difference in how solidly she sleeps, although many experts say there is no connection. Have you tried letting her feed herself? Charlotte wasn't into the spoon feeding thing for awhile, but really liked it when I let her feed herself small pieces of things like puffs, soft steamed fruit and even chicken.

You're not doing anything wrong. Jessica and I haven't actively done much different for our babies and they just randomly started sleeping. I honestly think it's luck of the draw sometimes. However, I know how awful it is to feel you're doing everything "right" and see no results. That's why I started this post! I also wonder if Elsie is doing the 8/9 month regression early because she's hit all of these milestones early.

 

[bananaz]

Yeah, Elsie is definitely interested in finger foods so that's probably the direction I'm going to head if she keeps refusing the purees, though most of the time she just chews the food up and then spits it out so I'm not sure how much actual nourishment she'll get out of it. I wish I hadn't just bought a bunch of pricy organic purees though! Maybe I'll eat them, haha.

My counselor has a background in child development and she's CONVINCED that massive quantities of solids are key to babies sleeping well. She's also the person who gave me Ferber's book and has been pushing me to completely night wean, which I think is a reasonable move at this point but not 3 months ago when she started trying to convince me. Her first child didn't STTN until he was almost 5 years old though so I guess I can see why it's a passionate topic for her

 

[Noelle610]

That's interesting! I think the solids help, but that's only if a baby is truly waking ONLY for hunger. And we all know they wake for many reasons other than that.

I love the Ferber book, so I'd certainly give it a read if I were you. That said, I have two issues with it.... One being his encouraging night weaning at 3/4 months old. I think for breast fed babies especially that's too early. I also think his "sleep needs averages" are super low.

Five YEARS? That scares me!

 

[MiniKiwi]

Wow Noelle! I actually had a smile reading your post. That is such a great day and night, I hope it continues for you

Bananaz, I also feel as though I'm doing something wrong. I don't think that's the case though, they just sleep when they want!

We had an ok night here. Bed at 8pm after 1.5 hrs rocking.. awake at 9:30 for a feed, awake at 12 for... a cuddle? She's never woken for no reason like that and happily went back to sleep when I cuddled her and then awake at 4am, it's 4:45am and she's almost asleep again and I'm up for the day!