Rant - unsupportive husband :(

[kitabird]

In the early days when things were tough my whole family urged me to switch to formula. I ignored them and persevered, and when things got better they stopped making comments (for the most part at least). My husband however is not happy that I still BF. I go back to work in not too long and am planning to give LO formula during the day because I don't respond well to a pump. I'm feeling really down about it and all OH can say is that I should stop BF completely. Why can't he just leave it alone and realise that it's important to me? I don't understand why he wouldn't want what's best for his child. He just wants us to be able to leave LO overnight so we can have a night off, and yes that would be nice, but it can wait. If I stop BF now I'll regret it and probably resent him for bullying me into it

 

[TheNewMrs]

Have you explained this to him? What does he say?

 

[kitabird]

He thinks I'm being irrational, formula will do no harm, I've BF for more than long enough etc. You'd think after almost 8 months he'd have got the message!

 

[w8ing4bean]

 

[missk1989]

I have lots of people making comments about me still bf but my OH is very supportive and i wouldnt have it any other way. If he wasnt i would be saying that if he wants me to stop then he can do all feeds including making them up, sterilising, and even night feeds. See how long it takes for him to change his mind.

 

[Brieanna]

Don't let him bully you into something you don't want to do or you will regret it. Sometimes men don't understand things. Maybe explain to him that with you going back to work you will miss your LO a lot and that bfing is not only for nutrition but for bonding too. Maybe tell him it is really important to you and that you would really appreciate his support but that you are going to do it even if he's not supportive. That way he knows that grumbling about it is not going to get him his nights back and he should just get over it, lol.

Good luck.

btw- OH and I haven't left LO alone for the night ever (when we go out or have fun we do it with our LO) and even though we haven't gotten much sleep I wouldn't change it for the world. They grow up so fast and it won't be too long until I will be wishing SHE was at home with us for the night, lol.

 

[seaweed eater]

I'm sorry hon

You definitely should not let him push you into stopping BF if you're not ready to stop. BF is a relationship between YOU and your LO, not your husband.

Honestly it sounds to me like your husband might be feeling a little neglected. It must be so tough with two kids, but perhaps if you found ways to have some more time together, or even improve the quality of the time you already have, that would help him to feel more heard and thus be more supportive?

 

[kitabird]

Thanks girls, I really want to make it to a year if possible. Realistically LO will probably be down to one feed for the last month or so, but every bit is good right?
My OH is definitely feeling neglected and we need to work on that. Hopefully he'll complain less if we can get some quality time together without stopping BF.

 

[megrenade]

Show him the ingredients.. if he still wants to feed his baby a bottle that is over 50% corn syrup solids, then you shouldn't give his opinion any thought.. or your families.

You are doing what you should be doing. Breastfeeding is challenging, yes.. but who said the right thing to do is always the easiest? It's not!

Keep going mama

 

[superfrizbee]

My DH mentioned about stopping BFing once. I told him to work on getting her to take a bottle, do all the night feeds and all the sterilising. About 7 months later he's not mentioned it since!

 

[kitabird]

Show him the ingredients.. if he still wants to feed his baby a bottle that is over 50% corn syrup solids, then you shouldn't give his opinion any thought.. or your families.

You are doing what you should be doing. Breastfeeding is challenging, yes.. but who said the right thing to do is always the easiest? It's not!

Keep going mama

really? corn syrup? I've not heard of that being in formula before. I'm not completely against formula, just don't want to use it any more than is necessary. If I wasn't returning to work I'd be hoping to not use any more but as it is I'll make do with combi feeding.

 

[megrenade]

Show him the ingredients.. if he still wants to feed his baby a bottle that is over 50% corn syrup solids, then you shouldn't give his opinion any thought.. or your families.

You are doing what you should be doing. Breastfeeding is challenging, yes.. but who said the right thing to do is always the easiest? It's not!

Keep going mama

really? corn syrup? I've not heard of that being in formula before. I'm not completely against formula, just don't want to use it any more than is necessary. If I wasn't returning to work I'd be hoping to not use any more but as it is I'll make do with combi feeding.

Yes. Look at the ingredients on *any* formula can. The first ingredient is always corn syrup solids.

And medical staff and formula feeders do not tell you what's in it probably because they don't really care or haven't given it a thought.

Not sure where you live, but I'm in America and our country feeds us *craps* and approves DISGUSTING food and poison for us to eat, so I question everything.

There are also PESTICIDES in infant formula.

 

[kitabird]

Show him the ingredients.. if he still wants to feed his baby a bottle that is over 50% corn syrup solids, then you shouldn't give his opinion any thought.. or your families.

You are doing what you should be doing. Breastfeeding is challenging, yes.. but who said the right thing to do is always the easiest? It's not!

Keep going mama

really? corn syrup? I've not heard of that being in formula before. I'm not completely against formula, just don't want to use it any more than is necessary. If I wasn't returning to work I'd be hoping to not use any more but as it is I'll make do with combi feeding.

Yes. Look at the ingredients on *any* formula can. The first ingredient is always corn syrup solids.

And medical staff and formula feeders do not tell you what's in it probably because they don't really care or haven't given it a thought.

Not sure where you live, but I'm in America and our country feeds us *craps* and approves DISGUSTING food and poison for us to eat, so I question everything.

There are also PESTICIDES in infant formula.

I'm in the UK, we don't really have corn syrup in anything. Looking at a carton of ready made formula the first ingredients are water and milk powder. Then oil, prebiotics, vitamins, minerals etc. Nothing weird!

 

[megrenade]

Show him the ingredients.. if he still wants to feed his baby a bottle that is over 50% corn syrup solids, then you shouldn't give his opinion any thought.. or your families.

You are doing what you should be doing. Breastfeeding is challenging, yes.. but who said the right thing to do is always the easiest? It's not!

Keep going mama

really? corn syrup? I've not heard of that being in formula before. I'm not completely against formula, just don't want to use it any more than is necessary. If I wasn't returning to work I'd be hoping to not use any more but as it is I'll make do with combi feeding.

Yes. Look at the ingredients on *any* formula can. The first ingredient is always corn syrup solids.

And medical staff and formula feeders do not tell you what's in it probably because they don't really care or haven't given it a thought.

Not sure where you live, but I'm in America and our country feeds us *craps* and approves DISGUSTING food and poison for us to eat, so I question everything.

There are also PESTICIDES in infant formula.

I'm in the UK, we don't really have corn syrup in anything. Looking at a carton of ready made formula the first ingredients are water and milk powder. Then oil, prebiotics, vitamins, minerals etc. Nothing weird!

Just another reason why America sucks I guess

 

[Fortune Cooki]

A bunch of crap is allowed in America that is not allowed in Europe or even Mexico. If you are able to breastfeed and willing to do so, keep going. Have you explained to your husband that the World Health Organization recommends feeding until 2 years? Sure, formula won't harm your baby, but it also won't provide the immunity to illnesses. The hormones are missing too.

 

[Calif]

Can you try a hospital grade pump? The extra freedom pumping gives you might make all the difference and help your husband be supportive.

 

[kitabird]

Can you try a hospital grade pump? The extra freedom pumping gives you might make all the difference and help your husband be supportive.

He thinks pumping is ridiculous because formula would be so much easier. Where would I get a hospital grade pump? I'm not convinced I could pump at work as I have trouble getting a let down and with a time limit to work to I'd be majorly stressed!