saving problem - a bit of a rant

mylittlebubs

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We never have saving money, if we did not much and not for long maybe a few months and it's all gone...
I;m not pushing the responsibility to oh coz now we are couple but i know before i met him i was a good saver..but since i stay at home and oh 's earning the money and all income basically he never put in the saving account...

last year he got into this business that gave him really good salary that he could have saved over 1k a month but he never did...i told him that how much expenses we have each month and when he got paid salary he should put the rest in the bank but he said he wanted to enjoy life and go out and have good time (drinking,eat out a lot and go out all the time and he always offered to pay for his friend for many meals and also he likes to buy new things as soon as he has money )

we've been in a this situation for a long time and the past few months has been really bad, i told him he has to learn to live without new things coz we used to have a lot less than what we have now and was very happy..but every time he buys new things...

2 weeks ago he got a few good customers and made good money but that should be enough for 4-5 weeks but when he got money he went and bought new computer stuffs that cost almost £100

the thing is i think he;s used to having what he wants all the time from his mom and still is coz if he emails his mom and tells her he wants something she would give him

my mom told me i have to try to save money and not tell him coz he just want to spend it if the money he's got in his account is gone..so i started for a couple of months now...

i keep it a secret ....i don't have income but when i have to buy food i always have some change and i put that in a secret account ..it's going quite well and he never notice it so i hope it works coz i think saving money is important in a long-term
 
Good for you! You should get him a book called The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey. Its generally about not using debt.. but Dave is also ruthless to people who don't live on less than they make. He gets after them for not growing up, not delaying pleasure.. living like a kid. Its a real eye opener!
 
I think saving is really important too my hubby works full time and i'm a SAHM but i get all the childrens tax credits and child benefit so every month i put £100 in a secret account and with the money i have saved i have just booked and paid for our first family holiday. Hubby was amazed when i told him he was happy but he also said if i had money spare i should use it to help pay the bills so he had more money for x-box games and beer, grrr.
 
I think saving is really important too my hubby works full time and i'm a SAHM but i get all the childrens tax credits and child benefit so every month i put £100 in a secret account and with the money i have saved i have just booked and paid for our first family holiday. Hubby was amazed when i told him he was happy but he also said if i had money spare i should use it to help pay the bills so he had more money for x-box games and beer, grrr.

:growlmad::growlmad: mil bought oh x-box and lots of games and before she comes for a visit she always asks if he wants any more games :growlmad:
he got an ipod and he bought a new one as soon as it came out too..so i sold the old one...

I was selling stuffs that we never used or things that we don't NEED on ebay here and can you believe it i made almost 1k in a few months and that paid off the bills for a couple of months when oh couldn't..he was also amazed about it...
i told him see how much money we wasted :blush:
 
We never have saving money, if we did not much and not for long maybe a few months and it's all gone...
I;m not pushing the responsibility to oh coz now we are couple but i know before i met him i was a good saver..but since i stay at home and oh 's earning the money and all income basically he never put in the saving account...

last year he got into this business that gave him really good salary that he could have saved over 1k a month but he never did...i told him that how much expenses we have each month and when he got paid salary he should put the rest in the bank but he said he wanted to enjoy life and go out and have good time (drinking,eat out a lot and go out all the time and he always offered to pay for his friend for many meals and also he likes to buy new things as soon as he has money )

we've been in a this situation for a long time and the past few months has been really bad, i told him he has to learn to live without new things coz we used to have a lot less than what we have now and was very happy..but every time he buys new things...

2 weeks ago he got a few good customers and made good money but that should be enough for 4-5 weeks but when he got money he went and bought new computer stuffs that cost almost £100

the thing is i think he;s used to having what he wants all the time from his mom and still is coz if he emails his mom and tells her he wants something she would give him

my mom told me i have to try to save money and not tell him coz he just want to spend it if the money he's got in his account is gone..so i started for a couple of months now...

i keep it a secret ....i don't have income but when i have to buy food i always have some change and i put that in a secret account ..it's going quite well and he never notice it so i hope it works coz i think saving money is important in a long-term

sorry to sound blunt but i think honesty is more important you are in a relationship and being deliberately decietful, regardless of your oh's 'failings' and your reasons for wanting to save when he cannot - you are lying to him :(
 
We never have saving money, if we did not much and not for long maybe a few months and it's all gone...
I;m not pushing the responsibility to oh coz now we are couple but i know before i met him i was a good saver..but since i stay at home and oh 's earning the money and all income basically he never put in the saving account...

last year he got into this business that gave him really good salary that he could have saved over 1k a month but he never did...i told him that how much expenses we have each month and when he got paid salary he should put the rest in the bank but he said he wanted to enjoy life and go out and have good time (drinking,eat out a lot and go out all the time and he always offered to pay for his friend for many meals and also he likes to buy new things as soon as he has money )

we've been in a this situation for a long time and the past few months has been really bad, i told him he has to learn to live without new things coz we used to have a lot less than what we have now and was very happy..but every time he buys new things...

2 weeks ago he got a few good customers and made good money but that should be enough for 4-5 weeks but when he got money he went and bought new computer stuffs that cost almost £100

the thing is i think he;s used to having what he wants all the time from his mom and still is coz if he emails his mom and tells her he wants something she would give him

my mom told me i have to try to save money and not tell him coz he just want to spend it if the money he's got in his account is gone..so i started for a couple of months now...

i keep it a secret ....i don't have income but when i have to buy food i always have some change and i put that in a secret account ..it's going quite well and he never notice it so i hope it works coz i think saving money is important in a long-term

sorry to sound blunt but i think honesty is more important you are in a relationship and being deliberately decietful, regardless of your oh's 'failings' and your reasons for wanting to save when he cannot - you are lying to him :(

i know what you mean...but it's been 7 years that i talk to him about it and he never did and every year we get into trouble so if this lying will help us in a long-term i think it;s worth it
 

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