September Snugglers 2016

[hopie2015]

Happy Mother's Day, everyone! I just made my mom breakfast in bed. Think we will surprise her today with the news. Sort of want to wait until after the high risk specialist appt. in a week but I am trusting all will be okay and maybe I should just tell her today. I'm about 23 weeks and should be showing soon!

I totally agree with this site and of course our September board . Just1 - thank you so much for starting it. We have had the sweetest members from the beginning- like Lesonmarie who her and her husband created the adorable snuggler ticker. Last pregnancy I was on the site the Bump. Quickly got off it and found great girls here on the miscarriage support board. I could not believe the way the bump ladies would talk to each other. It was so awful. That site scared me!!

Xan- I cannot believe about that terrible lady towards your friend..my gosh, what is wrong with some people?!
Thanks- I am going to try gluten free. I now hate eating as get awful gas pains whenever I eat.

Sarah- welcome back..so glad you guys had such a great holiday! I am guessing boy as well! Yay- another team yellow! We are two of the few!

9 days of rain here..unreal. Hope to see sunshine later. Enjoy your day, all!

 

[xanzaba]

Happy Mother's Day and Future Mother's Day!

Hopie- I can see telling your mother, it may give her something positive to focus on, and something for you two to share. But I also understand the impulse to wait. Do you think she would be able to keep a secret? That's probably what my deciding factor would be. I rushed to tell people about my previous pregnancies, and was super cautious this time around.

DH has been very cute lately. We agreed not to jinx anything by celebrating mother's day this year, so he brought me flowers on Friday and specifically told me they were not for mother's day. He's been so sweet lately- I've started doing little things we used to half-heartedly argue about the way he likes (like hanging the toilet paper with the flap over). The other day he noticed a couple of things and just held me and kissed me. I think we have morphed from a grumpy stage to a sappy stage.

 

[ajarvis]

Ssarah good job staying strong! I don't think I'd last I have a lovely summer cold too. Sore throat and congestion. But just on the right side. Annoying!

Time is definitely flying!! 4 months and I'm off for maternity leave. Can't wait

Looks like I'm being roped into a gender reveal party of sorts. My mother really wants one, and my son. So I'm going to let them to plan it ha. Mom's trying to get me to and I told her to set it up with Julian We'll see how that goes the gramma and the 10 year old. Could be fun.

 

[MummaMoo]

Feeling a bit mopey this afternoon. Have had a bit of a meltdown. Can I offload?

Every weekend is the same, I have Sophie on a Saturday whilst MrMoo is at work, he comes home and has a nap so again, I deal with her. Sundays, I have to get up to see to her at around 6.15/6.30 whilst MrMoo stays in bed til he's ready to get up, never usually before 8am. This morning he gets his breakfast, washes his own dishes (leaves mines and Sophie's) and then takes the laptop upstairs because he can't concentrate and again, leaves me to deal with Sophie whilst also saying the house needs tidying up, it's getting cluttered.
Every weekday, I have to get her up etc whilst he's off to work, then as soon as I get home, I have to get her tea, whilst he naps or again, sits at the laptop to do his "research".
I'm exhausted, I NEED a break! So I lost my temper and cried, telling him I need some alone time. Even if he lets me have some time in bed on a Sunday morning. He gives her a bath every other day, that's about it. He forgets that I have to do all this, work as well, AND grow another baby.
When I had my meltdown at him, his response was "I think we're heading the same way a lot of couples do once they have children, can you see this relationship lasting?" It's like he never even heard me that all I want, all I NEED, is a bit of help!
My reply to him was "yes, it could well do, because you're just not getting what I'm trying to tell you". He says he does, and that he does his fair share. Does he feck.
Am wondering what the hell were we thinking have one child, let alone two.

 

[ajarvis]

Awe. Sorry he's not getting it. I had to actually sit down and list everything I did in a day and ask him what he did. He finally got it after repeating the conversation over and over a few times. Now I still have to ask him to do the dishes after supper, or what not but it gets done without me doing it at least lol.

 

[campn]

Happy mothers to all of us!! Although we deserve a month to be celebrated

Mumma- Big huge hug! I notice MrMoo just throws in the towel when things go belly up, he should take it easy, not everything is "no more kids" or "relationship can't last!" You are Sophie's daddy too, and she needs you to do stuff with her. And your wifey needs a break and some alone time.

Sometimes when I feel like I'm losing it I just say "I'm going out, be back in an hour" if he's home and not doing much, he CAN watch the kid. My DH takes a nap almost every single day and gets his computer/tv time, so in return I need that breather, that release or I'd go crazy.

I say try talking to him again once he's a in a good mood and not defensive, just say I'm not attacking you, I just please need a bit of break sometime.

Burnt out mommy and wifey is bad for everyone!

 

[MummaMoo]

Thanks AJ and campn. Sadly I just picked one of those men that are never the problem in their eyes. Even tonight he have me a hug and said "I hope you feel better in the morning" as if I'm just feeling a bit off colour. He just doesn't see the problem because he's still getting to do everything he wants. I'm being a total whingebag tonight.

 

[campn]

Thanks AJ and campn. Sadly I just picked one of those men that are never the problem in their eyes. Even tonight he have me a hug and said "I hope you feel better in the morning" as if I'm just feeling a bit off colour. He just doesn't see the problem because he's still getting to do everything he wants. I'm being a total whingebag tonight.

You're pregnant, you have every reason to be a whingbag! I would like men to be pregnant and see how that's like!!

Ginge- I saw that mean person came back and posted even more rude stuff, some people huh!? Just hope you don't take it to heart. I get a feeling from her reply it's obviously a problem with her and her life as she doesn't know you at all, just wanted to make sure you don't take it personally or let it effect you.

 

[ajarvis]

I agree with campn you have every right to whine. But even more so since he clearly doesn't get it!

AFM I believe I'm possibly getting an ear infection. It's been getting worse all day. Congestion I had earlier and sore throat is way worse too. Just really hoping I don't need antibiotics because I"m allergic to penicillin so I'm not sure what they would give me.

 

[psychochick]

Happy mother's day!!

Hopie: did you tell your mom?

Xan: u and ur Dh sound cute. Haha, the neverending toilet paper debate. Sounds like you had a great mother's day.

Ajarvis: gender reveal party sounds like fun. Are they gonna allow the guests to put in bets and stuff?

Mummamoo: i totally agree that Dh didn't seem to listen to what you are saying. I think he saw your emotions but didn't hear ur words. So he interpreted it as that you are upset at him but didn't know why. It might help to talk to him again but be more calm, so he won't focus on the emotions but rather what you are saying.

 

[MummaMoo]

AJ, I hope it isn't an ear infection! If you have just had/got a cold, then over here the doctors sometimes don't give antibiotics unless it hasn't cleared on its own after a few days. Holding warm compresses to the ear with the head held to the side can help ease the pain. And steaming with menthol for the congestion.

Hope, curious if you told your mum too!

As for the selfish OH situation, I know he does a lot of thinking when he settles down for the night, so have left it. This morning he snuck around the house to allow me to sleep longer and made sure there was plenty of hot water for a shower, so there's a bit of progress already!

Oh yes, and ginge - the cheek of that girl! Every post bar hers have been in support of you, and we have your back. Snugglers forever, take crap from others - NEVER!! Gooooo Snugglers!!

 

[Mummy1506]

I've missed so much on here as I don't get chance to get on much. But I still love the vibe of this group!!

Congrats on the gender confirmations recently looks like boys are steaming ahead again!

Not a lot to report from me had my 20wk scan everything looked perfect her tummy measured ahead of the rest so probably on for another big babba!

I'm having days at the moment where I think omg it really isn't that long until our babies start arriving & that I'm totally unprepared then when I'm sat at working thinking it's so far away not sure I can hang in there til the end crazy!

 

[x-ginge-x]

Not taking it to heart, she clearly has issues with her seemingly perfect life! Good for her but she needs some serious education in manners if you ask me. She got another point blank reply anyhow. Tut. Thanks for the support ladies!

 

[xanzaba]

X-ginge- I would report the posts. I think that the congenial atmosphere of this board is partly due to the fact that they do crack down on people who are out of line. Also, I don't know anything because I don't have kids yet, but it seems to me that there is an expectation that bonding, breastfeeding and everything else that happens at the beginning happens magically and naturally. Also everyone talks about bonding, but there really isn't a sense of what it means to bond. It stems from this idea that women are just evolved to be mothers and nothing else, and puts a lot of pressure on women to be the perfect mother. And if they feel they aren't, it pushes them away from their kids. But don't you have a whole life to get to know your children and form bonds through what you do together and getting to know them?

Anyway, just a thought from someone who has nothing to base her thoughts on

 

[campn]

Xan- You said it all! Very very accurate and true. Thank you hun!

 

[campn]

Ginge- I really don't like reporting anyone as I feel like we all have bad foul days, but I reported her second reply as she wouldn't stop and the administrator just replied back on your post and asked her to leave the thread.

I hope you're having a better day today!

 

[x-ginge-x]

Yes have just seen her reply, very peeved admin it seems! thanks campn

 

[MummaMoo]

Yes, just seen admins reply to Ginge's thread - way to go

It took me a good while to feel totally connected to Sophie. I got to a point where she would be in my arms crying, she wouldn't be consoled and I'd look at her without really feeling anything.

 

[campn]

With DS it took us until he was 3-4 months to really bond. Also bonding and loving are two different things. Even when they're older not everyday it'll be this natural instinct thing, but if someone touches them!? I'll go batsh** crazy on them. Being protective over them is also a form of bonding.

This pregnancy I tried to really shield my heart in the first trimester cause I kept thinking something bad might happen. I even told my doctor I think I might miscarry so I'd go days trying not to think I'm even pregnant.

Motherhood is a mix of so so many feelings you never knew existed inside of you.

 

[borr.dg.baby]

I've just read through the other thread Ginge. I'm sorry such an insensitive person has jumped in to give a useless opinion. Please don't feel bad. With my daughter I was insanely in love with her during pregnancy and when she was born I cried my eyes out and hated being with her for the first month or so. these things take time. With this baby we've been having financial struggles and even though it took us about 1.5 years to conceive with the help of fertility treatments I feel some days that I am not even pregnant and I regret having conceived. I know it sounds awful, and I know it's just the rough spot we are in right now making me feel these things and it will go away. I am sure you are a great mom and you love your children. It's so hard sometimes and even when our children are 100% wanted and loved, some patches of life just make us think and feel stupid things. I am glad to see everyone else has supported you, and thank you for being honest as I know it's hard to open up about these feelings.