Share ur Poems, Art, Thoughts as Remembrance

[Cornfieldland]

I thought it would be nice to have a place to share our expressions of love, loss, grief and remembrance of the ones we have loved and lost. Please feel free to share drawings, pictures, art, poems, thoughts, anything you like...No Judgement!
It really heals the heart and soul to have an artistic outlet to share your pain, and by sharing our thoughts we help others going though this as well. I'll start it off and hopefully you will join me!

 

[Cornfieldland]

You started smaller than a poppyseed, how could that cause so much pain?
Something so small, and unseen, but loved just the same.
You were unexpected, a big change in our plans,
A small precious bump that we saw in a scan.
I was scared and unsure, but full of hope and joy,
Would you be a girl or a boy?
You made me so sick, each and every day,
But to me that meant, you would be OK.
Your tiny heart beating, a flicker on the screen,
You were real, growing, a tiny little bean.
We couldn't wait to meet you...who would you be?
What would we name you, I couldn't wait to see!?
Whatever your name you were ours together,
Made in love, and something special.
But something just wasn't right, and you couldn't stay.
You broke our hearts when you slipped away.
I wanted to hold you in my arms, see your face, and hear you cry,
But instead I held you in my hands and had to say goodbye.
I won't forget your little toes, perfect legs, and sleeping eyes,
How you looked so peaceful, and how you would never cry.
Maybe I didn't love you enough the short time you were here,
But everyday since I think of you and cry silent tears.
Now you are in Gods' memory, if he will be so kind,
Maybe one day I'll hold you for real, and not only in my mind.
But for now I'll hold you in my heart, and think of you everyday.
My little love, my sleeping baby, that somehow slipped away.

 

[LilMiss_91]

So beautiful hun. Thankyou so much for sharing xxx

 

[AnnieMac2]

I'm so impressed, Corn. I love it - thanks for sharing. Fantastic idea.

 

[pinkpassion]

Wow, that's beautiful and I can feel every word you wrote... that feels so therapeutic to me!!!
Your baby is just beautiful !!! Thank you so much for sharing !!!!! You know I'm that picture it looks just like your little baby is sleeping on a flower, as though part of the flower, perfect and peaceful!!!!
I really admire and thank you for sharing!!!!!! I will share some things too!!!

 

[lilmisscaviar]

I think that is truly inspiring, Corn. It is a very emotional time we all are going through and I also tend to express my feelings through art. I can completely relate to your poem and that picture is breathtaking. A few days ago I actually drew a pencil sketch of a group of barnyard birds (I live on a farm and birds are inspiring to me) which I will share. The momma duck represents me, the rooster feet are my DH, the duckling is my DD, the chick is my DS, the two smaller chicks are my two previous losses and the egg on the right that was trying to hatch but failed expresses my current miscarriage that I'm going through as we speak.

 

[Cornfieldland]

Thank you so much for sharing lilmiss! That's a beautiful drawing, it's so special.. I love it! I love to draw as well, and find it really helps to have that outlet. I drew a lot after my divorce and after the loss as well. I love how you have the whole family, and your little chicks and egg....it's truly beautiful! Thank you so much for having the courage to share that, I feel privileged to get to see it. I felt kinda naked putting my poem up there ; )

 

[pinkpassion]

Finally... I feel like sharing... I've had a big cry and let all my emotions run out onto paper... here is my poem:

Sweet little baby growing in my heart
I knew I'd love you greatly even from the start,
When that test turned positive I was jumping for joy
Daddy was excited and said you'd be a boy,
With the loss of your siblings, The anxiety was tough ,
But we really did believe that we'd been through enough..
We thought about the next year,
and tried to put aside the fear,
That maybe God had other plans,
So we left it in his hands ,
We talked about some names for you,
Not knowing he or she,
We wanted to wait to see who you were, until you came out of me,
My womb may be empty, this faulty little nest,
That's supposed to keep you safe and sound until you're placed upon my chest,
My heart, however, is overflowing, growing more and more,
And the love I feel for all my babes go to my very core,
I imagine our loving father, as he welcomed you with love,
Knowing you'd never have to hurt, because you are safe up above,
So selfishly I hurt and grieve, As I tell you goodbye,
My beautiful baby, I miss you so with every tear I cry !!!

 

[Cornfieldland]

Oh Pink...that's beautiful and so touching! I can feel evey word and the pain in your heart. Thank you, for being brave enough to share that with us, it's truly breathtaking.

 

[Cornfieldland]

Anyone want to share? : )
Here is a old drawing of mine... I have a weakness for manga style drawings. We'll call this one "tears"

 

[Cornfieldland]

We'll call this one "hope"
Ok..so I'm no professional...but drawing is a good outlet ; )

 

[pinkpassion]

Wow.... that's absolutely beautiful !!!!!! It's so expressive and you can see fear and hurt , yet hope!!! Love that!!

 

[pinkpassion]

I just saw the other one on the other page, it's amazing!!!! You truly are artistic and have talent there!!!

 

[pinkpassion]

I actually had written two poems , and only shared one... I can share the other one... here it is.... it's a bit personal as it's a lot of my praying I've done so I feel like it's an intimate part of my relationship with the Lord so it's a bit scary to put it out there, but here it is...

My sovereign heavenly father,
It is me, your weary daughter,
I come with so many questions,
Can you calm my crazy emotions?
I know you have a perfect plan, your arms are not too short,
All my plans and my selfish will I humbly must abort,
But can you give me peace instead,
As I lay here crying alone in bed,
Did my baby hurt, or did he cry?
Did he fight to stay, did he give it a good try?
Does he know how much I love him?
That I prayed for him from head to limb?
That we had so many future plans?
From what his face would look like, to his tiny feet and hands!
That I hoped that he would know and love You with all his heart?
That one day he would do your will and gladly do his part,
I wonder how he felt when you held him In your embrace,
If instead of being fearful was he filled with mercy and grace ?
Was there something so familiar, to the instant love he felt?
Is he handsome , is he whole, would he just make our hearts melt?
He must have already known you, because you were with him every day,
In the darkness, in the shadows, knitting him together in every way,
He was yours from the beginning. Given to us for just a time,
But oh my God how bad it hurts to know he's no longer mine!
There's part of me that's happy, to know he's there with you,
I'm so thankful for you Father, and all the things you do,
Forgive me for my lack of faith and when I question why,
It's from my lonely broken heart,* where the devil tries to lie,
He plants a seed of doubt you see, he's very good indeed,
I know better , though, I will obey, and Satan will not succeed!
For in you there is hope and joy, that I really can not explain,
You are my king, you are my Lord, on the throne you reign ..
So, in this life, I must admit, the pain and sorrow I know,
Will not lay hold upon my heart and the bitterness will not show,
I have a future and a hope, that I hold on to with you leading the way,
"Your will, Your way!!" That's what I choose to say!

 

[LilMiss_91]

Pink, that is absolutely beautiful and brought me very close to tears. I hope you find peace xx

 

[Cornfieldland]

Thank you Pink for sharing your heart with us. It's beautiful and I can relate to that struggle of faith and asking why. What beautiful expressions, I hope you are healing a bit xxx

 

[pinkpassion]

Thank you ladies.. it's a bit scary putting yourself out there isnt it!!

Corn, thank you, yes I am healing well.. hopefully my testing will happen soon and we can get on with this process!!