She just doesn't like her dad.

[Ratty]

I don't hang around him but when she is screaming, bright red, and stopping breathing from crying so much, I have to step in!![/QUOTE]

I agree, if they get into such a state then its best you step in. My OH and I had arguments because of me doing the same, but there is a limit to how much we can take. Its really hard to hear them cry when you know you can stop it by just taking them in your arms.

Maybe try wait until she is in a really happy mood and let them have some "play" time. That way they get used to each other when both are relaxed and having fun.

Good luck, hope it gets better soon.

 

[Serene123]

She has played with him a few times. She just won't sit with him, cuddle with him, let him pick her up or anything..

 

[Mrs L]

would he take her in the bath with him? My OH did that with Niamh and shes changed towards him now i think its a trust thing and you are 100% right its heart breaking to see your baby that distraught! x

 

[anita665]

Pierre has had his moments like this with his dad too. It was horrible but luckily didn't last long.

Still he really plays up on OH's days off work. I guess because it's a break in his routine.

 

[sonny]

When Rich is home try and do positive things together,like play with her together so she can still see you and let Rich take over a bit more.Also with bath time etc both be there so she can see you but let him do more of the task in hand whatever that may be at the time.

Tabs chokes,vomits goes red etc when she screams to the breaking point. it also sets off her reflux to the point it is audible but Andy has to have his chance to help soothe her etc so i have to walk away, or we swap over each time as when her meds dose is too low we suffer for a few days and you need to swap over for sanity.
Make him feel more invoved and praise the little bits he does do as he is probably feeling incredibly left out and unwanted.
I know him getting frustrated doesnt help but you do need to pull together.

 

[Tezzy]

ffion is the same with col and he says the same things as rich does

 

[Samo]

if someone was getting mad at me and telling me to shut up, then telling my mother to sort things out in a mean tone of voice...i probably would not like the person either!!! she is too young to understand who is who. maybe if there is something he could do with her to create a better bond...feeding her, changing, bath time...she will start to associate him s a caregiver as well and maybe warm up to him a bit more.

i babysat a little girl one day who automatically connected to me, i could NOT leave the room without her screaming! DH was there too but she wanted nothing to do with him. i figured because the little one was with her mother all the time, she associated me being female and felt secure with me as opposed to my DH (who LOVES kids) who she did not give an ounce of care for. it wasn't that she did not like him, she just didn't feel comfortable enough. i had him give her a bottle, and that was when she stopped crying when he went near her.

 

[xCherylx]

OH was the same, because he was at work in the day they didn't really get a chance to 'get to know each other'?! So on his day off I said that I was going out for an hour and I had my mobile if he needed me, told him what he needed like a feed or something or a nap if grumpy, what toys he likes most etc. He soon learnt to deal with things and as I leave him for a 6 hours on a Monday together he knows how to "deal with him" when he is being awkward. I think it's just they needed to bond together

 

[mBLACK]

sorry to say this but if he tells her to shut up, he sounds like an ass. maybe she knows he's not the one..

 

[ryder]

Babies can read feelings, even if they cant undersand advanced conversation... If you have any tension or hard feelings towards your oh/ex then there is a possibility that she is picking up on that.

On the other hand, she may also need to gain his trust. So he needs to spend more time with her in a calm, inviting manner... Quality time, etc... Which is hard if he can feed and bond with her too... But im sure there are other things she enjoys? Does she find baths calming? PLaying with certain things?

It might mean that both you and Rich need to do a few things together with her, and try and be happy and patient together while doing it...

Im not trying to say this is your fault and that Rich isnt wrong when he blames you etc. But like a couple other people have said earlier, babies and dogs are very sensitive to feelings and emotions.

 

[ryder]

Do you ever tell Rich any ideas that help Cailtlin calm down if she is getting upset? You oviously know what works... Maybe leave Cailtlin alone with Rich and someone else who does know Caitlin a bit better... I also remember other threads about all the issues you have been having with Rich, so likely from the beginning she has had a bad feeling about Rich.