She screams so much!!

[leedsforever]

Sweetie, I know exactly how you feel. Kaida is like this...or was. She's slowly getting better. Turned out she has oral thrush and it was causing her discomfort as she was feeding. She'd pull on and off, get frustrated. Also, she's a gassy baby. I'd have whole days where I couldn't put her down, she'd never settle for anyone else. Everything other babies would have to calm down, she hates. Hates dummies/pacifiers, hates to be swaddled, just like your little one...she loves her hands free. Hates her crib, so I do lay her on a pillow and co sleep with her.
She hates car seats, driving.. even hates riding in her pushchair/stroller.
I'd sometimes cry my eyes out and think "why me?.. why do I have to have a high maintenance baby? Why can't she just be happy?"
Sometimes when she's crying to the point she's her breath and there seems to be nothing I do to settle her, I've actually felt like just laying her down and curling up in a ball and giving up.
It can be very exhausting and draining and most of the time.
People are always asking me when I am having another.. I don't think I will.
As bad it sounds, I honestly don't think I could do it again. I may have a mellow child, but I won't risk my sanity. lol
I love her dearly..,more than words. She's a miracle that wasn't supposed to happen and I know I'll look back and it will all seem like I was overreacting.
However, overreacting or not.. I'm blessed enough with her.
For all you mothers with more than one child? You deserve a bloody medal.

Thanks hun its really supportive to know Im not alone!! When OH is not in the bed Im so tempted to have her on the pillow and co sleep with her!! Ive done it twice! I know its frowned upon but it helps!! Its odd though lol... cos Im drifting off to sleep and I keep opening my eyes to check whether shes sleeping and shes just staring at me with her big brown eyes, sucking away at her dummy!!

I feel for you hun... luckily courtney makes little fuss when in her car seat or pram!! And luckily courtney likes her dummy.... but she often spits it out then looks for it... so its a constant job keep putting it in her mouth! I think the same.... why do I have a baby that cries all the time and has a constant need for fuss and attention!!

Glad its getting better

 

[leedsforever]

Kerry, sweetheart, I feel your pain... I really do!! Morgan was like this at around the age Courtney is now. She would take her bottle and then scream louder than before she had it!! Would never settle, constantly have hiccups, couldn't lie her down, being sick etc...

I was chucking the infacol down her left, right and centre... helped a little bit, but not really! So I changed her bottles to Dr Browns and that helped reduce the wind dramatically.... however, she would still be crying and looking in pain after feeding and was still really unsettled and being sick a lot

She would get hiccups and gulp a lot which seemed to be painful for her.... so I went to the GP as I was pretty sure she had acid reflux. He agreed and prescribed Infant Gaviscon and I saw a difference in her from the first feed!!!

It took about a week to get the full effect from it, but once it finally kicked in properly, she stopped screaming, setttled better, would sleep in her moses basket (we had to pretty much let her sleep sat up in her rocker or car seat before that!) and actually started sleeping from about 10-11pm right through til 6-7am!!!!!!!

She's been on it a few weeks now, and is still so much better for it. OK, so her poo has gone a lot harder but she's not constipated as such (I offer her water during the day and she drinks between 2-4oz a day).

This week, she's started waking up in the night about 3-4am again and has been really grizzly and having fits of the screaming ab-dabs, but then she had her jabs on Tuesday so she's still getting over them... on top of which she's seems to have a bit of a cold (she's a little snot factory at the minute!!) and to add salt tot he wounds, I'm pretty sure she's started teething - all the signs are there.... chowing down on her fingers, teething rash on her cheeks, and uber-dribble!!! I'm just glad she's old enough for Calpol now.... ahhhhhh "baby-crack"!! Knocks her right out!!!

After all the rambling on... what I'm trying to say is you're not alone chick! It sounds to me like she could well have reflux. See what the GP says on Monday - but try and hang on in there... it does and WILL get easier!! And don't forget, you've got my number if ever you need a chat/rant/cry!!!

thankyou!!

Im so happy with what you have said about gavsicon!! This is what my HV has told me to ask for!! However I was starting to think that it wouldnt help all my symptons.... eg her not sleeping in her moses basket!

Thats how courtney goes after a feed... like looking in pain... grimacing and making other faces!! Kicking her legs out and strengthening her body!!
She will be relaxed one minute then do this... Im often winding her 2 hours after a feed ... dont always get a burp but it helps her!!

I was considering going for other bottles but my HV said it prob wouldnt make much a difference!! im holding her now and shes got really bad hiccups.... her whole tummy goes in bless her!! and the sickness....gosh it still oozes out of her 2 hours after a feed!! luckily hv saw what i was meaning so i think she does think she has reflux... drew me a diagram of babies bellys etc!!

gosh teething, jabs etc ... got more to come!! fingers crossed gaviscon works for courtney too... !!

Here we go squirming around in my arms.... shes def uncomfortable.... bless her

 

[mylittlebubs]

Have you tried swaddling her? My baby was like this in hospital really unsettled and they swaddled him and he loved it, stopped his crying almost straight away.

same for me. my baby cries so much, his legs kick in the air, arms move about and his lips shake when he cries and this few days it gets worse. I swaddle him and it really helps.
I just did that and put him to sleep 5min ago.

when he cries a lot i also feel like i want a break because of tiredness, but i hope it will get better.

 

[reallytinyamy]

Kerry, I'm sorry to hear you're having a rough time.

I have no advice from my experience I'm afraid, but it has made me realise how extremely lucky I am to have a baby like Chloe.

What I will say is that I had been warned that Chloe may behave in a similar way to what you describe as she may be allergic to milk.

OH was allergic to all formula and cows milk when he was a baby (still is actually) and what you say about Courtney is what MIL said about him. He ended up only being able to drink goats milk.

I am by no means saying that is the problem you have but perhaps worth mentioning to the Dr as evidently it is possible for babies to be allergic to formula- and breast milk I believe aswell!!!

I do hope the dr can help you

And BTW you are by no means a bad mum, and because sometimes you think you dont like Courtney it doesnt mean you dont love her. The reality is you dont like the situation, not you dont like youyr little girl. Does that make sense?

 

[carmen]

Are you breast feeding?

Reason i ask is , my oh sister just had a little girl in June and well she was the same always screaming and it was really stressing the mam out , it was too much for her trying to bf 10 times a day. Then she switched her over to formula and she said she noticed the difference , she was able to get into a routine with her . But before that it was hell.

 

[~KACI~]

Sorry you having such a bad time of it, not really got any advice but always have loads of

 

[leedsforever]

Kerry, I'm sorry to hear you're having a rough time.

I have no advice from my experience I'm afraid, but it has made me realise how extremely lucky I am to have a baby like Chloe.

What I will say is that I had been warned that Chloe may behave in a similar way to what you describe as she may be allergic to milk.

OH was allergic to all formula and cows milk when he was a baby (still is actually) and what you say about Courtney is what MIL said about him. He ended up only being able to drink goats milk.

I am by no means saying that is the problem you have but perhaps worth mentioning to the Dr as evidently it is possible for babies to be allergic to formula- and breast milk I believe aswell!!!

I do hope the dr can help you

And BTW you are by no means a bad mum, and because sometimes you think you dont like Courtney it doesnt mean you dont love her. The reality is you dont like the situation, not you dont like youyr little girl. Does that make sense?

thanks hun it does make perfect sense!!

Im def going to talk to my doc about this... cos my friends baby was lactose intolerant and she ended up have soya milk!!

But shes surprised me on her last 2 feeds.... so surely if she was lactose intolerant it would be after every single feed

 

[leedsforever]

Are you breast feeding?

Reason i ask is , my oh sister just had a little girl in June and well she was the same always screaming and it was really stressing the mam out , it was too much for her trying to bf 10 times a day. Then she switched her over to formula and she said she noticed the difference , she was able to get into a routine with her . But before that it was hell.

https://www.babyandbump.com/breast-bottle-feeding/55786-am-done.html another thread of my regarding breastfeeding!! Were both finding that tough too!!

So Courtney is more bottle fed!! And Im thinking its time to end trying to breast feed at all!! So we can both try and get into more of a routine!!

 

[sparkswillfly]

Let us know how you get on. Hope you find a solution. x

 

[lynz]

i know what you mean hun it is really hard going when your little one does nothing but cry. Chloe-marie has her tantrum time from bout 4pm till 11pm ish and it gradually gets worse the more tired she gets. She does nothing but cry and sometimes cries that much she holds her breath which really scares me, nothing i do seems to settle her, and like you i just want to scream "shut up" When she then falls asleep i feel so bad for thinking like that and then think i should be so grateful i was able to have her as there is so many people out there who cant have kids. I think its only natural to feel like that at times after all we are only human im just hoping it gets easier as she gets older.

 

[leedsforever]

thanks lynz!!! Courtney does that too.... holds her breath!! Its awful to watch them get so wound up but yet they are not in need of anything

 

[embo216]

Hi kerry,

I really do know how your feeling! I really went through it when lily was Courtneys age! Lily is still really really gassy and it still really upsets her. It might not be the gas though hun, I know you said she didnt like the swaddling but it really helps, i dont think any baby likes it much! Lily hated it but once she was swaddled really tight and i rocked her on my knees and went 'shhh' she was so calm. Its a calming reflex they have till 3 months, but it still works on lily now!

I know how you feel and you shouldnt feel bad when you say you dont like her sometimes, I think we've all felt like this but just dont admit it. As long as you love them its ok not to be so keen on them sometimes! I also had some terrible baby blues for the first month or so, my OH was the only one she seemed she wanted and I was pertrified when I was on my own with her, completely different now though! Shes a mummys girl! God and now I just look at her and think how did I manage to make such a beautiful baby! Honestly it does change, just keep an eye on how your feeling, there were times when I thought I was close to depression.

Best advise I can give is take one day at a time! If you ever need a natter or some advice gimme a bell.

x

 

[KarenLV]

Skyler also screamed a lot when he was around 2 months old.Now when he gets upset I take him close to a mirror and he immediately stops and smiles. He loves looking at himself!
If that does not work I swaddle him and place him in my sling and walk around the house and hum a lullaby. That usually calms him and he falls asleep.
Skyler sleeps with us at night and during the day he sleeps in his crib. He is very contented that way.It's the only way that worked for us.
Good luck. Hope you find something that works for your little one.

 

[tinytoes]

Ted does throw tantrums. Every time before he sleeps. He'll kick his legs and his arms will flail about, pulling my hair and grabbing at my chest and he'll scream and appear to be a devil-child!!

I worked out it's him trying to fight sleep. It's what we have to go through before he'll sleep. Now I've worked out he's not screaming in pain, or trying to be a pain, and that it's just him fighting sleep I find it easier to cope with.

I find that a little gently bouncing while cradling him (during which time he's screaming like no-bodies business) helps get him from screaming to snoozing in no time. In fact the best thing is to pop on VH1 and dance with him to some cheesy classics. After 5 mins the dancing makes him zonk off even if he wanted to fight it. Just trying to rock him doesnt work - it has to be a bounce. And singing to him doesnt work unless I'm bouncing or dancing.

I'm hoping he'll grow out of it once he's able to express his sheer tiredness in other ways, but I bet he wont. Some kids just hate to go to bed ...bet I've been lucky and got one of them!!! (I think I was one too though..)

I also sleep with him in my bed every night. HE loves it and so do I. I see no harm in it - I know he's there so wont squash him. We dont have lots of space as ther's 3 of us in there but I think Ted lvoes being cuddled right up to me. He breast feeds laying down and relaxes soooo much quicker than in his own bed. I get so much more sleep. I did try and get him back to his own bed a while back but I think I'll do it when he's a bit older and able to calm himself more. For now he'll sleep with us - why not, we love it. Maybe at 3 or 4 months I'll have a rethink adn try and get some of my bed back..

 

[AppleBlossom]

Grace is a very bad tempered little madam. She doesn't cry so much, it's the screaming in complete temper that's bad! If you put her down and she wants to be held she screams until her face goes red. I can't leave her alone when she gets herself in that much of a state so I pick her up and she instantly stops. So naughty! She is such an attention seeker. Typical little girl

 

[Ema]

XxxxX

 

[leedsforever]

Ted does throw tantrums. Every time before he sleeps. He'll kick his legs and his arms will flail about, pulling my hair and grabbing at my chest and he'll scream and appear to be a devil-child!!

I worked out it's him trying to fight sleep. It's what we have to go through before he'll sleep. Now I've worked out he's not screaming in pain, or trying to be a pain, and that it's just him fighting sleep I find it easier to cope with.

I find that a little gently bouncing while cradling him (during which time he's screaming like no-bodies business) helps get him from screaming to snoozing in no time. In fact the best thing is to pop on VH1 and dance with him to some cheesy classics. After 5 mins the dancing makes him zonk off even if he wanted to fight it. Just trying to rock him doesnt work - it has to be a bounce. And singing to him doesnt work unless I'm bouncing or dancing.

I'm hoping he'll grow out of it once he's able to express his sheer tiredness in other ways, but I bet he wont. Some kids just hate to go to bed ...bet I've been lucky and got one of them!!! (I think I was one too though..)

I also sleep with him in my bed every night. HE loves it and so do I. I see no harm in it - I know he's there so wont squash him. We dont have lots of space as ther's 3 of us in there but I think Ted lvoes being cuddled right up to me. He breast feeds laying down and relaxes soooo much quicker than in his own bed. I get so much more sleep. I did try and get him back to his own bed a while back but I think I'll do it when he's a bit older and able to calm himself more. For now he'll sleep with us - why not, we love it. Maybe at 3 or 4 months I'll have a rethink adn try and get some of my bed back..

Im absolutely draining my mobile phone battery with music lol... ive worked out that she really likes it... It can really calm her down

i dont want to get into a habit of her sleeping in my bed but I think Im not going to feel so bad now if I have to do it!! Your right ... I get so much more sleep that way too!!

 

[leedsforever]

Grace is a very bad tempered little madam. She doesn't cry so much, it's the screaming in complete temper that's bad! If you put her down and she wants to be held she screams until her face goes red. I can't leave her alone when she gets herself in that much of a state so I pick her up and she instantly stops. So naughty! She is such an attention seeker. Typical little girl

yep courtney does this.... her face goes soooo red.... and she almost clenches her fists with hatred lol!!

 

[Jenny]

Aw, I hope things start calming down for you!

 

[leedsforever]

i dont want to jinx it but since her feed at 8pm last night things have been quite calm!!

She seemed to love her bath last night and slept quite well (but think it had something to do with laying next to my OH on the sofa)!! He would get up to make a coffee or something and shed start whimpering but it wasnt her normal tantrum!

she then woke at 4am ..OH fed her and he said she wasnt no way near as sick etc and settled quite quickly!! I fed her at 8am and again she went back down and I even got some more sleep!! She got a bit grizzly after I fed her at 1.30pm (which she got a bit of breast ) But Neyo and chris brown on my phone soon stopped that
She then fed again at 5pm which she cried a bit for.... but again that is what I can handle... when she cries in need of something!! My mum fed her... and again little sickness and she went straight in the car at 5.30pm which she has slept since

Is it possible that her stomach may be maturing?? Getting used to having milk etc!!

Now Im in 2 minds what to say to the doc tomorrow!! Whether to go saying shes got really bad colic... or admit that she has been fine since saturday lunch?!?!