Should I announce?

[wheelz23]

4w6d...
Took a blood test on 3w6d and had a 192 HCG. Some websites say that's good, others not. So I'm hoping that everything is okay.
I've had pure exhaustion, stretching/pulling, random occasional cramp, NO bleeding, do you guys think I would be okay to announce for Christmas? Took a HPT yesterday afternoon around 5pm and I got a strong positive. I just am so afraid of chemical pregnancies! Or a miscarriage. I don't know what to really do I'm 23 and in good healthy standpoint, I haven't drank coffee and have been taking prenatals. I just hope everything is okay with the baby. My boobs fluctuate on hurting or not. Should we tell family? Or am I just awaiting the worst.

 

[Scout]

Here's the thing: if you were to lose the pregnancy would you be okay that other people know? If so, then tell whenever you want. The only thing with waiting is that if you wouldn't want people to know if you had a chemical or miscarriage, or if you think it would be too hard to go back and tell the people you had lost the pregnancy.

And really, nobody can tell you if your pregnancy is going to work out with just a single (or even multiple ) hcg numbers. I've had 3 miscarriages, the first one my hcg at just over 5 weeks was 38,000; with the 2nd my hcg was under 1000 at over 5 weeks; with my 3rd, my hcg climbed appropriately the first 3 blood draws then slowed down. So you just never know.

I think it would be lovely to announce on Christmas tbh, regardless of how far along you are. If you are announcing to people you love and who love you (which I'd assume) then those same people would want to support you if something happened. Statistically though, I think everything will be fine! Congratulations!

 

[wheelz23]

thank you! I'm so nervous about losing the baby. It's terrifying how common. So sorry for your loss! Were there any signs that gave it away? Or was it the bleeding. (sorry if this is too personal, i am not trying to cross any lines)

 

[Talia12]

I agree - I was with my son and am this time desperate to announce, but it comes down to, would you be okay telling those same people you'd lost the baby? My mum and sister, and some close friends, yes, but others I wouldn't so I am holding off

 

[PrettyInInk42]

I agree with Scout. Think about having to potentially tell people that you've lost it. If I was you, I'd wait. Maybe make a cute announcement on Valentine's Day or something.

 

[wheelz23]

I guess I should have elaborated a little bit more. Not publicly announce, but just with our families. If I lost it, I'd want their support.

 

[sil]

If you would want your support in the case that you would lose the baby, then I would definitely tell them! There is no reason not to and it will be fun to share the joy with them

 

[xdxxtx]

I tell my family right away, with a positive test, every time. We told my mother in law with the first ultrasound at 6+1 with our first, but my mom in law passed away when we were 27 weeks along. We aren't close with my father in law or the others, so they find out when we tell our friends, too. That being said, I tell my family so that I have the support the whole way through and have people who will be there for me and help me out should I miscarry. I might be miscarrying this pregnancy, finding out tomorrow hopefully, so I'm really glad I have my mom and sister to help with my kids and my own grieving during the process of that's what happens. My mom lost several pregnancies, so she would always be right by my side. I would not want to have to tell my in laws something went wrong. They'd blame me, and even though I know it wouldn't be my fault, I wouldn't cope well with their nonsense. You do what's right for you. Definitely get yourself a support system right now. You don't wanna be left with only your OH to share your happiness and excitement with, and you don't wanna be left with no one to help you out if it's not meant to be.

 

[misspriss]

I guess I should have elaborated a little bit more. Not publicly announce, but just with our families. If I lost it, I'd want their support.

By all means then, announce. If the worst happens, you would want them to be there to support you.

I am plannimg to announce at Christmas, I will be 8 weeks and I saw the heartbeat on my scan. I announced my first before 4 weeks and no problems. I waited until nearly 11 weeks with my second, I did have a chemical two months before my second child, but that isn't the reason. This one will be around 8 weeks, because of the holiday.

 

[JAJuly2013]

I totally agree with Scout - announce to whomever and whenever you want. It's your pregnancy! Some don't feel comfortable telling early on in case something happens. Others are excited to shout it from the roof tops. Only you can make that decision. I found out at 3+6 and told my hubby (of course!) and my mother. We didn't tell the rest of our family until I was 8 weeks after we had an ultrasound and I was sure it wasn't a chemical pregnancy. Some co-workers were told around that time as well. We just had an ultrasound at 11+2 and that was when we announced it publicly on Facebook. If something does happen, yes it will be hard to go back and tell people we lost the baby but that can happen at any time in a pregnancy. It isn't for sure until the baby is born. Wishing you a happy and healthy pregnancy!

 

[wheelz23]

Thank you! That helps a lot. It's scary! I hope everything goes okay. I found out as well at 3w6d!

 

[jessmke]

I've told people right from the start with all four of my pregnancies, just to my close friends and family (we are not the type to do mass announcements in social medi anyways). Two were miscarriages and honestly I didn't mind telling people that it happened. I took some time to grieve before telling people the news so I wasn't so emotional, but I personally am happy to talk about it to normalize it a bit. I found that when I told people quite a few confided in me that they had also had a miscarriage and had never told anyone before which made me really sad for them that they felt like they had to keep a secret. I know some people would just rather keep that personal information to themselves, but other people keep it a secret because they feel it is a taboo subject which I don't think is right. If you are excited to tell then I say go for it!

 

[Mrs Dragonfly]

I guess I should have elaborated a little bit more. Not publicly announce, but just with our families. If I lost it, I'd want their support.

This, exactly! I would announce and share your wonderful news, what a gift at Christmas. If something did happen, you would have support. A regret I have from my miscarriage in August was we didn't tell anyone I was pregnant so I felt completely alone in my grief. With this pregnancy we told our parents early on.

Congrats!

 

[wheelz23]

I announced and everyone was SUPER happy. Even if it ends in miscarriage, the baby is so loved already! My mom got me a bracelet with a Peridot birthstone in it to think of the baby!

 

[UnderPressure]

I announced and everyone was SUPER happy. Even if it ends in miscarriage, the baby is so loved already! My mom got me a bracelet with a Peridot birthstone in it to think of the baby!

That's so sweet! Glad you decided to share with them sooner rather than later. My mom was upset that we told her two days later with this one