Sleep Sense Support Group!

[jaybee]

Hi everyone,
I'm new to the idea of sleep sense.
I filled out the free report yesterday, and she has said that Toby should go down between 6 and 7!
Do any of you get your baby to sleep at this time?

At what age did you start this with you LO's? is 6 weeks a bit young?

Look forward to hearing from you.
Ju
x

 

[history_girls]

It has been so long! and I knew I should have made more of an effort! I'll explain:

It was half term so we went away which was fab - sleep was on hols was ok, brill at home. but last few nights not good at all. It was so hot here last night i put her to bed without her bag - it was a complete disaster. She had a complete breakdown for an hour (that wasn't even a SS moan but on me being cuddled), then put her in her bag and out like a light. I have this morning made her a summer bag out of a sheet.

I come on here and I am so reassured that it isn't just her! but the heat but I do also think having read through the missing threads that i might be approaching the 8 month sleep regression. Does anyone know anything more about it? does it last long????

I hope everyone has good nights tonight - it is cooler here now thank goodness.

Hello newbies! I'll be more attentive now I promise!
Polaris - nice to see you back!

 

[Cattia]

Hi HG,good to see you back! Glad you had a good holiday.

Seems like this heat is giving everyone the run around! Last night was horrible for us - you might have read by thread in baby club - Abigail's sensor alarm went off for the first time ever! I apparently screamed as soon as it started beeping according to DH, although I don't remember doing that, but LO straight away started crying so it must have woken her up! She was huddled into the tightest corner at the bottom of the cot, so we're guessing that the monitor just stopped detecting her but of course I can't stop worrying that there was actually something wrong with her breathing

Tonight has been much better so far; I have put her down with just a one tog sleeping bag and a nappy, no vest or anything. It is 23 degrees upstairs at the moment. She usually wakes for her first feed at 12-1am so I have a vest ready to put on her then so she doesn't get cold later in the night. She went down without so much as a moan! She has really started moving around the cot though. I went up just now to check on her and she was pressed against the side of the cot with her arms dangling out, and her face pressed into the mattress I moved her head so now at least she's not facing downwards. I think there is a bit of cool airflow at the back of the cot which is why she likes to stick her arms and legs out!

Jaybee, hi and welcome to SS! I would not put too much pressure on yourself to get great results too soon, as your LO is still so young, just take it slowly. When Abigail was that age she would not settle at all before 11am and it was usually about midnight. She just wanted to feed all evening. It was at about 8 weeks that she started to get more settled in the evenings, and now she starts her bedtime routine at 6pm and is asleep by 7. Bedtimes doget earlier, but it takes a little while. I think it's really helpful tostart a bedtime routine as soon as possible, even if it happens several hours before LO actually goes to sleep! It will help them to understand bedtime and will be already in place when they start to settle more easily in the evenings.

 

[hivechild]

Lana - sorry that you're still having problems. I'm not sure if you saw it last time, but has your DH tried to put her to bed at home without you around? I know that doesn't sound like fun, and is hardly good for the ego, but at least you'd be able to figure out if it is that she won't settle with you around/because she can smell your milk etc. Ronan is MUCH better at settling without me in his line of sight when he's having a hard time unwinding, especially with naps. He can whinge and moan for a good bit but if he sees me/makes eye contact with me, he starts screaming the house down.

I feel for all you poor girls dealing with the heat and it affecting your LO's sleep. It makes me ever so grateful that we have central air/heat in the house as it's been quite hot and horribly humid here too. Ronan's still going to bed in long sleeve sleepsuits and a snuggly sleeping bag!

HG - welcome back! Glad things went well on vacation but sorry that it's all gone pear shaped for you in the last few days. On the 8 month sleep regression, I once again can't recommend the book 'The Wonder Weeks' highly enough. It's so insightful and a great read. I am starting to feel like a broken down record here.

Jaybee - I started at 7 weeks with Ronan. The free report is a little bit rubbish to be honest and just a canned response. The 'book' says that at that age, you can expect a bed time of around 9-10 (I don't remember the exact hours but that's close enough, and might even be later - I'm too lazy to look it up), and Ronan was going down pretty consistently around 9:30 at night. He's naturally moved it forward over the last 2 months to between 7-8pm most nights.

We just played it by ear depending on his last nap of the day, and at your LO's age, I think it helps to remain flexible and just roll with it rather than trying to enforce any kind of schedule. I think the 'ritual' of a bedtime routine is more important than any actual fixed time schedule.

Also, once we knew that Ronan could self settle to sleep, if he is having a rough time, or has gotten over-tired for whatever reason, I will happily give him cuddles and help him get off to sleep. It never happens consistently and to date hasn't become habit or affected his ability to fall asleep on his own thereafter, but I think at such a young age if they really need you, you should be there for them.

Cattia - Glad to hear that Abigail went down better tonight. Fingers crossed the rest of the night goes well!

Ronan's continued with his unsettled sleep, as is to be expected! He went down to sleep fine, woke at 2:20ish and had a feed but he didn't seem very hungry and kept nodding off but I still managed to keep him awake to put him back in his cot and he was asleep by 3. I'm trying to be very mindful during this time of not letting him get into the habit of falling asleep nursing through the night since he's waking a bit more than normal.

Unfortunately he only slept until 5:30 before waking again. I thought he might have done his morning poop, but nope, not yet. I fed him again and again he didn't seem too hungry and was nodding off but I once again put him down awake and he fell back asleep at about 6:30 before waking an hour or so later to finally do his poop and then shouting to get up for the day by 8.

Hopefully tonight goes a little better. We had a bit of a rough day. Mummy was negligent and dropped a box of diaper bags on his head today. He now has a few marks on the bridge of his nose and a scratch on the side of his forehead and he was upset and crying while his grandma and granddad were here to visit so I ended up giving him some Tylenol since he seemed out of sorts. Thankfully he settled and fell asleep on me about 20 minutes later. I feel awful though. I know it's really not serious, but I still caused my baby boy pain!

 

[history_girls]

Hive - off to see if the wonder weeks is on amazon uk - might get it. Need a bit of reassurance on what she is up to. Whoops on the nappy dropping incident! The pole that props up the washing line got phoebe on saturday and then she fell out of her highchair a week ago so bad mummy is being really careful now!

Cattia - hope you night continued well

Well LO has gone to bed an hour early as she was so tired (first day back with childminder) and she screamed for almost an hour when we got home. So feel very guilty about working this evening. She has also gone to bed with no milk - that made her hysterical. She has been fussy so much with her bed time milk I'm thinking of giving it up. Anyone else not do bedtime feed?

Jaybee - we started at 4 half months with SS but had a bedtime routine from day one although she ignored it! It did really help around 8 weeks when she started to get night and day around the right way. We love it now!

 

[jaybee]

Thanks for the comments about SS and bedtimes.
We do have bedtime routine which is done 9 out of 10 nights. He is usually asleep by 10pm, although normally in my arms! I feel he is still too little for SS. Am going to look at it in another couple of weeks.

 

[polaris]

Historygirls - hi! So glad that you had a nice holiday over the half-term break. Must be hard going back to work though. At least it's not long now until summer holidays. Sorry to hear that Phoebe's sleep has been a bit all over the place too since you got back from your holidays. It's so confusing trying to keep up with what's going on with them isn't it?

I don't know what's up with Thomas at the moment, his sleep is terrible. I have been googling sleep regression too, but we are a bit early as he's only seven and a half months and his sleep has been rubbish for a couple of weeks already. Last night he had two feeds which he hasn't done for ages and ages (2 a.m. and 5.30 a.m.) as well as another brief wake up at about 4ish. I didn't think he was going to go back to sleep after 5.30 a.m. feed but he eventually went back to sleep for an hour at about twenty past six. Thank goodness, I am really not able for these 5.30 a.m. starts to the day - and Thomas isn't either, he's always much more cranky all day when he's got up too early. His naps are fantastic, it is just night time sleep that is the problem. He settled really well at bedtime tonight though for a change so I have my fingers crossed for a better night tonight.

I think Hivechild should be getting commission for the wonder weeks book! I ordered from amazon so you should be able to find it there.

 

[hivechild]

HG - Well at least I'm not the only bad mummy here! I felt less bad about it when I got him up this morning and he'd scratched himself through the night on the other side of his forehead. Of course I then had a brief moment of guilt for not trimming his nails shorter, but I had just cut them at the end of last week!

Polaris - Fingers crossed that Thomas has a better night of things tonight. If only they could communicate with us as to what's going on in their minds!

As for commission on the Wonder Weeks, I wish! I was actually talking to my husband the other night about how I have pretty much just been winging it from the moment I got pregnant and didn't read ahead or really prepare myself a whole lot for either birth or being a new mother. In some ways I wonder if that hasn't bitten me on the backside, but on the other hand, I had a wonderful birth and I think I'm doing just fine as mummy and dealing with things as they come to the fore. The most 'prepared' I've been is to have bought this book and Gil Rapley's book on BLWing, oh and the Sleep Sense thing of course, but all of that has only been in the last couple months!

 

[polaris]

HG - Well at least I'm not the only bad mummy here! I felt less bad about it when I got him up this morning and he'd scratched himself through the night on the other side of his forehead. Of course I then had a brief moment of guilt for not trimming his nails shorter, but I had just cut them at the end of last week!

Polaris - Fingers crossed that Thomas has a better night of things tonight. If only they could communicate with us as to what's going on in their minds!

As for commission on the Wonder Weeks, I wish! I was actually talking to my husband the other night about how I have pretty much just been winging it from the moment I got pregnant and didn't read ahead or really prepare myself a whole lot for either birth or being a new mother. In some ways I wonder if that hasn't bitten me on the backside, but on the other hand, I had a wonderful birth and I think I'm doing just fine as mummy and dealing with things as they come to the fore. The most 'prepared' I've been is to have bought this book and Gil Rapley's book on BLWing, oh and the Sleep Sense thing of course, but all of that has only been in the last couple months!

Well you strike me as very on top of things for someone who is supposedly winging it!! Are you planning to do BLW? I would highly recommend it, it is loads of fun and Thomas loves it!!

No luck on a better night's sleep for us, Thomas was awake at 10 p.m., 12.15 a.m., and from 4.30 until about 6 a.m. I really don't know what's up with him. I'm now wondering if he might have been too cold last night since the weather has changed!! As you say, wouldn't it be great if they could just tell us what's going on.

I don't really know what to try next - he naps really well during the day, settles himself to sleep and has been doing so for months, doesn't seem particularly hungry when he wakes (although I did give him two feeds again last night), can often settle himself back to sleep without any intervention from me, so why is he waking up crying so often at the moment? And why is he suddenly awake for long periods during the night? Like this morning he woke up at 4.30, grizzled and whimpered and seemed to be going back to sleep for about half an hour so I just left him to it, then I was sure he had gone back to sleep because everything went quiet for about 15 minutes but then at 5.20 he started properly crying so I got up and fed him and he did finally go back to sleep at about 6. I don't know if I should be feeding him quicker in the hopes that he might go back to sleep quicker or if I should be cutting off his night feeds altogether. It's so hard to know what to do for the best.

 

[momandpeanut]

Hi ladies , i hope you dont mind me popping in for some advise !

I have an 18 month old who doesnt sleep and im reaching the end of the line , i am exhusted !
Would you recommend trying the sleep sense and why ?

thank you

 

[polaris]

Hi ladies , i hope you dont mind me popping in for some advise !

I have an 18 month old who doesnt sleep and im reaching the end of the line , i am exhusted !
Would you recommend trying the sleep sense and why ?

thank you

Hi momandpeanut, welcome. I haven't used sleepsense with an older baby but there are a couple of ladies on here who have, with good results. How does your LO sleep at the moment? You must be exhausted after 18 months.

 

[polaris]

Well Thomas settled absolutely beautifully at bedtime tonight. I have my fingers and toes crossed for a better night tonight. I am considering giving him water to settle him if he wakes during the night. Because I don't think he's waking out of hunger but I am ending up feeding him which I am worried might be setting up a habit which will be harder to break. What do you think? I'm a bit worried to do it in case he actually is waking because he's hungry. I know he is hungry when he wakes at 4/5 so I don't mind feeding him then but the last couple of nights I have ended up feeding him twice.

 

[Cattia]

Hi all,

Well, what are our LOs up to eh? Polaris, Thomas does sound very unsettled and Abigail has been just the same. I thought it was the hot weather but last night it was much cooler and it didn't seem to make any difference; she woke up three times in the night (since I count 5.40 as a night waking). Polaris, it did make me smile when you said you are not 'able' for early morning wakings as that's an expression I heard for the first time the other day from my Irish friend! She also says, when her LO has recently done something, that he is 'after' doing such and such which I had never heard before either. Anyway, enough comparing regional variations! I am also thinking of offering Abigail water. The HV told me last week when I asked her about night wakings, that once they are over 6 months and on three good meals a day, you can rely on them not being hungry when they wake at night, and you can 'knock night feeds on the head' (I thin she was hinting at CIO but I also think offering water might be another way to do it).

HG- I hope Phoebe settled for you; I am dreading the return to work but I am sure it's much harder on you than it is on them. We went to look at a child minder this week who comes really highly recommended. I was hoping I would walk in and just love it, but I just thought it was 'nice', how did you choose yours? DH thinks I would not be happy with anyone as I really don't want to leave her anywhere!

Abigail went down fine this evening but we are expecting another unsettled night. She was meant to be in her own room this week but I put it off after her breathing alarm went off the other night, even though I am sure she just moved off the pad. We have quite a busy week and I want to move her on a day when we are at home so I can get her taking naps in her cot all day ready for the evening. Now we are aiming for Friday. Hope you all have a good night!

 

[momandpeanut]

Hi ladies , i hope you dont mind me popping in for some advise !

I have an 18 month old who doesnt sleep and im reaching the end of the line , i am exhusted !
Would you recommend trying the sleep sense and why ?

thank you

Hi momandpeanut, welcome. I haven't used sleepsense with an older baby but there are a couple of ladies on here who have, with good results. How does your LO sleep at the moment? You must be exhausted after 18 months.

logan goes down really well he has his bottle in bed then we just sit int he room till hes asleep no taking or anything , its the night time wake ups that are the problem when he wakes he just will not go back to sleep , we have screaming or just point blank not sleeping

 

[history_girls]

We had the night from hell last night! Poor LO had a temperature and was not happy. OH tried SS but after 20 mins of sobbing (and me having a bit of a cry too) I got into the spare bed with her and we crashed out together. Bit of a zombie at work today......

Cattia - my problem when looking for cm was that they all looked OK and I thought Phoebe would be OK with each of them. What made me choose mine? Erm... I met her kids who were absolutely lovely and beautifully behaved and I thought I'd like mine like that. I also saw her with some of the kids she minded and they were well behaved and it all seemed rather calm and I liked that. I also thought she looked the type of lady who would scoop Phoebe up and giver her a kiss and a cuddle when she fell over. I wasn't 100% convinced on her but 7 weeks in I think she is an angel sent from heaven. Go with your gut - if your not happy keep looking. No one is ever as good as mummy and i think you have to accept that in order to find a CM.

Momandpeanut - wow! well done for keeping going. I think polo_princess had great results with a toddler - back about 20 pages i think!

 

[polaris]

Hi ladies , i hope you dont mind me popping in for some advise !

I have an 18 month old who doesnt sleep and im reaching the end of the line , i am exhusted !
Would you recommend trying the sleep sense and why ?

thank you

Hi momandpeanut, welcome. I haven't used sleepsense with an older baby but there are a couple of ladies on here who have, with good results. How does your LO sleep at the moment? You must be exhausted after 18 months.

logan goes down really well he has his bottle in bed then we just sit int he room till hes asleep no taking or anything , its the night time wake ups that are the problem when he wakes he just will not go back to sleep , we have screaming or just point blank not sleeping

Oh no, that must be a bit of a nightmare. Does he wake often during the night? What do you do at the moment when he wakes at night? Does he nap during the day? What time does he normally go to bed at? Sorry for all the questions, just trying to get a picture of how things are for you at the moment.

 

[polaris]

We had the night from hell last night! Poor LO had a temperature and was not happy. OH tried SS but after 20 mins of sobbing (and me having a bit of a cry too) I got into the spare bed with her and we crashed out together. Bit of a zombie at work today......

Poor Phoebe, I hope she is feeling a bit better today? It's awful when they are not well.

 

[history_girls]

Shes getting better but can you believe there was not one dr available where I live this afternoon (a town of 100,000) as they were all on a training session! All I got was NHS direct!

All quiet on the sleep front tonight so far! fingers crossed

 

[Poppy7]

Sorry to hear some of you are having bad nights lately Polaris, Elliott still wakes for feeds and I know sometimes he probably isn't that hungry but he does always feed well. I have tried giving him water in a bottle before instead of a bf but he wan't having any of it!! He has started sleeping so much better lately (kind of coniciding with him eating more solids??) only waking for a feed once or twice a night (once a night the last few nights ). However when I feed him at night I make sure he is awake and that I put him back down in his cot awake so that I know he is not using me to resettle.

momandpeanut you must be exhausted!!!!! I think there was another lady on here a few weeks back who did SS with an older girl and she had very positive results so good luck to you

Well, Elliott has been a super star lately. Last night he went to bed and was asleep by 8pm. He woke at 12.30am for a feed and then slept until 6am. At 6am he was still so sleepy so I fed him and put him back down again and he slept until 7.45am!! What a star. Daytime naps are finallly coming together too. More often that not these days he is sleeping for 1-2 hours at a time (sometimes 2.5 hours). It's so lovely how refreshed he is after a lovely long nap. I can't help but think that his sleeping seems to have become better since starting solids properly. This could just be a conicidence. As long as it continues I don't mind at all!xx

 

[momandpeanut]

Hi ladies , i hope you dont mind me popping in for some advise !

I have an 18 month old who doesnt sleep and im reaching the end of the line , i am exhusted !
Would you recommend trying the sleep sense and why ?

thank you

Hi momandpeanut, welcome. I haven't used sleepsense with an older baby but there are a couple of ladies on here who have, with good results. How does your LO sleep at the moment? You must be exhausted after 18 months.

logan goes down really well he has his bottle in bed then we just sit int he room till hes asleep no taking or anything , its the night time wake ups that are the problem when he wakes he just will not go back to sleep , we have screaming or just point blank not sleeping

Oh no, that must be a bit of a nightmare. Does he wake often during the night? What do you do at the moment when he wakes at night? Does he nap during the day? What time does he normally go to bed at? Sorry for all the questions, just trying to get a picture of how things are for you at the moment.

he wakes anything up to 5+times a night ! i just lay him dont repeatadly no talking and sometimes he has milk . he has 1 nap in the day for about an hour and goes to bed around 7pm

last night was a nightmare he woke at 11 ,12 and then was awake from 1 till 4.30 ! im reaching the end of the line !
polo is sending me some info today so hopefully things may start to change soon