Sleepless Nights Support Thread

[donnarobinson]

Your not an awful mom hun, its so hard when ur really tired,
My 15 month old has had me up since 5.30am and I'm shattered and woke in a vile mood,
Hope ur ok x it will get better x

I'm starting to feel resentment towards my baby because he's an awful sleeper and I'm so sleep deprived. He doesn't deserve it, it's not his fault but I have a hard time wanting to be fun and smile at him when I'm still fuming that he was up four times last night and screamed for two hours before napping only 30 minutes today. How do you put on a cheery face when you are so tired? I'm such an awful mom!

 

[pinksmarties]

I'm starting to feel resentment towards my baby because he's an awful sleeper and I'm so sleep deprived. He doesn't deserve it, it's not his fault but I have a hard time wanting to be fun and smile at him when I'm still fuming that he was up four times last night and screamed for two hours before napping only 30 minutes today. How do you put on a cheery face when you are so tired? I'm such an awful mom!

This is exactly how I am feeling too. LO has never been a great sleeper (we had 3 weeks around 2 months when he went form 7pm -3am feed then sleep till 7) but now he is waking every 2 hours or so. No 2 nights are ever the same. I have tried self settle and sometimes it works but that seems to be getting worse too. We have a good bedtime routine bath, bf cot and that generally works really well but it is the night wakings that are really getting to me. If he did go 3 hours then I would feed him thinking he was hungry but with waking every 2 hours I know he cannot be hungry as if we pick him up/ bring into bed he settles and sleep straight away. Last night to help my sanity OH took over,he woke at 9.30 (bed was 7.15ish) 45 mins to resettle without a feed, woke at 11 bottle from OH, I fed him at 2.30, I woke at 5.30 to find him in bed with OH (spare room) and again at 6.20 and he then woke up at 7.30. So clearly he can go a length of time without needing fed. His naps during the day are only 30 mins long max and have been since 3 months old no matter where he sleeps or what I do so over the course of a day he could have 4-5 naps before bed. I don't know what to do anymore, I am crying constantly as I feel I am about to lose it the last few days. Can anyone help? sorry for the long post.

 

[Kelly M]

Thanks for the support ladies. I was up with lo from 10 to 1:30 as he just would not sleep. Hopefully its just a phase. At least I dont feel alone!

 

[Janers]

Hi ladies

I haven't spent much time in this particular thread, my LO has always been a pretty good sleeper until now. Putting her down to sleep takes forever, and she screams if she's not being held. I used to be able to nurse her to sleep and quietly lay her down, and she'd be good for a few hours. Now nothing that has to do with sleep is easy, naps are difficult, going down for the night is insanely hard, she is up at 5am all day, and she has been so fussy and what makes it even worst, my old tricks just aren't working. It feels like I spend my entire day and night trying to get her to sleep!?

I'm frustrated, extremely tired, and I need someone to tell me this is just a phase.

 

[Kelly M]

Hi ladies

I haven't spent much time in this particular thread, my LO has always been a pretty good sleeper until now. Putting her down to sleep takes forever, and she screams if she's not being held. I used to be able to nurse her to sleep and quietly lay her down, and she'd be good for a few hours. Now nothing that has to do with sleep is easy, naps are difficult, going down for the night is insanely hard, she is up at 5am all day, and she has been so fussy and what makes it even worst, my old tricks just aren't working. It feels like I spend my entire day and night trying to get her to sleep!?

I'm frustrated, extremely tired, and I need someone to tell me this is just a phase.

This is exactly how I feel. All the old tricks don't work all of a sudden. He won't nurse to sleep, cries at nap and bed time and in the middle of the night (which he never used to do) and is so hard to settle. It must be some kind of developmental phase that babies go through.

 

[Kelly M]

Hi ladies

I haven't spent much time in this particular thread, my LO has always been a pretty good sleeper until now. Putting her down to sleep takes forever, and she screams if she's not being held. I used to be able to nurse her to sleep and quietly lay her down, and she'd be good for a few hours. Now nothing that has to do with sleep is easy, naps are difficult, going down for the night is insanely hard, she is up at 5am all day, and she has been so fussy and what makes it even worst, my old tricks just aren't working. It feels like I spend my entire day and night trying to get her to sleep!?

I'm frustrated, extremely tired, and I need someone to tell me this is just a phase.

This is exactly how I feel. All the old tricks don't work all of a sudden. He won't nurse to sleep, cries at nap and bed time and in the middle of the night (which he never used to do) and is so hard to settle. It must be some kind of developmental phase that babies go through.

 

[Janers]

Kelly M: Yes, my LO never used to cry in the middle of the night, and all of a sudden she is. Its just exhausting, I'm not sure what to do to get her to sleep!? I mean she HAS to be tired!

I wish someone tried this hard to make sure I got enough sleep on a daily basis

 

[fides]

and, we've regressed even more. i got an hour long nap yesterday afternoon while DH had the kids, then last night, my times of rest were 40 minutes, 5 minutes, 40 minutes, 5 minutes, 45 minutes, 15 minutes, then up for the day.

i just don't care about anything, and i'm taking things out on my poor DH.

 

[Kelly M]

Fides, I'm with you. It seems to be getting worse over here. Last night ds was up probably 15 times or more. I lost count before I even fell asleep. I hope I'm not creating more bad habits but I've been so desperate for sleep that I just keep nursing him all night long to get him back to sleep and even that doesn't work most the time but I figure if I'm up he might as well eat so he's at least quiet with a boob in his mouth. lol

 

[lauren26]

My DS seems to be getting worse. He was doing two 3 hour stretches which I could cope with but now he seems to be doing just one and then is up every hour at least for the rest of the night. Any advice? We have introduced a bedtime routine which seems to help getting him to sleep but I have real trouble settling him back down in the night. I've tried offering him both breasts but he only ever wants one and he also gets a lot of gas pains.

My daughter started doing the same and it looks like she's got a dairy allergy (cows milk protein allergy). I just cut out dairy so that she won't get it through BF but this sounds just like her at night. We got the go ahead to give her gas drops and that helped during the day. GL!

 

[lauren26]

and, we've regressed even more. i got an hour long nap yesterday afternoon while DH had the kids, then last night, my times of rest were 40 minutes, 5 minutes, 40 minutes, 5 minutes, 45 minutes, 15 minutes, then up for the day.

i just don't care about anything, and i'm taking things out on my poor DH.

Omg the pic of your LO is adorable. I'm so sorry I definitely recommend getting some support from other moms IRL if you can or a PP support group. It's helped me feel supplemental support along with BnB.

 

[girl friday]

Fides & Kelly M, do you have a spare bed at all and would you consider cosleeping?

I got through the awful nights with DS1 (and get through the bad ones with DS2) by cosleeping. DH will decamp to the spare bed and I have more room to share with DS2 so I can feed him, roll away and get into a comfortable position to sleep for a short while. I sometimes doze while feeding too.
It really was and has been a lifesaver.

It has also meant DH gets more sleep too, meaning he can function better at work.

 

[fides]

Fides, I'm with you. It seems to be getting worse over here. Last night ds was up probably 15 times or more. I lost count before I even fell asleep. I hope I'm not creating more bad habits but I've been so desperate for sleep that I just keep nursing him all night long to get him back to sleep and even that doesn't work most the time but I figure if I'm up he might as well eat so he's at least quiet with a boob in his mouth. lol

who cares about bad habits at this point, right? i vote for do anything you can to get the baby to sleep.

and, we've regressed even more. i got an hour long nap yesterday afternoon while DH had the kids, then last night, my times of rest were 40 minutes, 5 minutes, 40 minutes, 5 minutes, 45 minutes, 15 minutes, then up for the day.

i just don't care about anything, and i'm taking things out on my poor DH.

Omg the pic of your LO is adorable. I'm so sorry I definitely recommend getting some support from other moms IRL if you can or a PP support group. It's helped me feel supplemental support along with BnB.

thanks!

Fides & Kelly M, do you have a spare bed at all and would you consider cosleeping?

I got through the awful nights with DS1 (and get through the bad ones with DS2) by cosleeping. DH will decamp to the spare bed and I have more room to share with DS2 so I can feed him, roll away and get into a comfortable position to sleep for a short while. I sometimes doze while feeding too.
It really was and has been a lifesaver.

It has also meant DH gets more sleep too, meaning he can function better at work.

coslept with my first son, but this one hates it - doesn't want to lay on or near me unless i am upright.


What we have decided to do is take turns with the kiddo. now, i combi-feed and i usually nurse a lot during the night, until he recently learned to suck his thumb., The other night i was just way, way too exhausted and at breaking point, so DH took him for the night while i slept in the other room. i came in a few times to help, but baby didn't want my boob anyway, even though it was leaking a little - just screamed off it. Anyway, DH gave me two nights off in a row, and i am feeling MUCH better - i got 6 hours of sleep last night!!! so, 2 nights on and 2 nights off is the new plan. i'm sure this will hurt my already tiny milk supply, but i just couldn't function anymore.

 

[Kelly M]

I have resorted to co-sleeping for naps and occasionally at night if my dh sleeps downstairs. Last night we started sleep training from The Sleep Lady's Gentle Guide. I sat next to his crib and comforted him until he finally fell asleep after some fussing and crying. He did great. It was tough and I had to stay strong and just kept reassuring him but he eventually fell asleep on his own and stayed asleep for three hours before waking! That's a record lately. He woke up at 11:30 pm and I ssshhh'd and patted him and he fell back asleep without me nursing or rocking or even picking him up! Whoah! He was up a few more times but still he got way better sleep than usual so was in a wonderful mood today. And then he napped for TWO AND A HALF HOURS this morning! I'm so proud. Of course, I couldn't sleep for some reason but I got a break at least. I'm hoping this continues to improve. Stay strong ladies! And remember, there are gentle ways to help your baby sleep better if you are not into cio or cc. Learning to fall asleep on their own is a skill that will help them self settle in the night and paves the road to good sleep for the whole family. I can't wait for ds to sttn or go at least only one feed per night. I'm trying to stay optimistic!

 

[fides]

yay!! glad that is working well - i used something similar with my older son and plan to do that again this time when the baby's older. hope it continues to get better for you.

 

[PepsiChic]

*sigh*

Connors in his bassinet screaming...again.

Colic, teething, sinuses, and im suspecting reflux. Its been this way since birth "it'll get better at 12 weeks" yeah and pigs will fly wearing pokadot bikins.

Its almost 1am. I had him asleep at 9:30pm, he woke up at 10pm, got him down at 12am...he was sick and woke himself off pissed off.

He keeps spitting up on me, his nose is stuffy and everytime i clear it it goes right baack to being stuffy again.

4 hours of this now no matter what i do he screams and cries. if i even so much as act like im going to put him down he starts screaming. I have to be up for work in 6 hours.

I asked my husband to come help, he came in held the baby for 5 minutes and handed him back to me. thanks a bunch.

Im seriosuly fed up with this now. Im worried im going to drop him im SO tired. 4 months of this crap im exhausted, im stressed, upset and depressed.

I dont have anyone to help with the baby, all my family live 5000 miles away.

 

[girl friday]

Have you given him anything for the teething?
Does he have anything for the reflux or colic?
Do you prop the end of the bassinet up?

 

[PoppyPainting]

*sigh*

Connors in his bassinet screaming...again.

Colic, teething, sinuses, and im suspecting reflux. Its been this way since birth "it'll get better at 12 weeks" yeah and pigs will fly wearing pokadot bikins.

Its almost 1am. I had him asleep at 9:30pm, he woke up at 10pm, got him down at 12am...he was sick and woke himself off pissed off.

He keeps spitting up on me, his nose is stuffy and everytime i clear it it goes right baack to being stuffy again.

4 hours of this now no matter what i do he screams and cries. if i even so much as act like im going to put him down he starts screaming. I have to be up for work in 6 hours.

I asked my husband to come help, he came in held the baby for 5 minutes and handed him back to me. thanks a bunch.

Im seriosuly fed up with this now. Im worried im going to drop him im SO tired. 4 months of this crap im exhausted, im stressed, upset and depressed.

I dont have anyone to help with the baby, all my family live 5000 miles away.

My lo would wake and thrash around every time I laid her in her cot after a night feed. She was diagnosed with reflux and now I hold her upright for 15 mins after her feed and prop the end of her cot up on books and she goes to sleep like a dream.try everything! Good luck xx

 

[freddie]

Support thread sounds good... I am so in need of it I swear my LO is the worst sleeper in history of all babies Nearly nine months of sleep deprivation is really taking its toll on me and DH... DS is up 5-10 times a night, sometimes for hours. How do you cope?!

 

[fides]