"So, when are you gonna have kids?" - Responses needed!!

[Mild Mango]

I need your help! How do you respond to the dreaded question "So, when are you gonna start having kids?".

I get that question constantly from acquaintances, coworkers, even my ex-boyfriend's mom! While I don't mind telling close friends and family about my difficulties getting pregnant, I don't feel like explaining myself to people I don't know that well.

Usually I just say "I don't know" and change the subject, but I need some better responses! Hopefully something with a little more attitude! I'd really like to build a mental database of snarky, funny, and/or dismissive responses for the next time someone asks.

Some of the good ones I've heard have been:

• "Why do you ask?",
• "As soon as I figure out how", or
• "Hopefully 9 months from this morning" (My favorite).

How do you respond to this question?!

 

[mrshan]

I usually say "We're trying, but we're really just enjoying our time together while it's just the two of us." That seems to reassure people that we do want kids. The only downside to this approach is that I sometimes get unsolicited advice on what worked for them, but usually I just get knowing nods and support, and some kind of soothing comment like 'it'll happen when it's supposed to happen, so don't worry.'

I'm not a terribly private person though, so I don't particularly mind talking about my period with acquaintances. It all depends on your comfort level.

 

[Cheekygringo]

You could try and reply with...

When you loose some weight.

When we win the lotto.

When we feel like it.

Waiting for a sign in the stars.

I'm waiting to be abducted by aliens first.

Why, do you want to race?

'Ain't nobody got time for that!

We're still at practicing the 'making' stage...

I usually just have fun. My niece is 9 and every time family asks me this. I think they gave finally given up asking.

 

[Mild Mango]

@Cheekygringo: Hahaha @ "Why? Do you want to race?" I love that! Also "Ain't nobody got time for that!" Hahaha! I think that one would come out best after a few drinks.

@mrshan: I like that one too! I tend to be a little more private, so I don't really want to tell my boss that I'm trying (He asks me at least once a month, and he's known for being a jerk). But that would be a good one for my in-laws or certain friends. I like that it sounds so positive!

 

[purplecupcake]

I would always just say "someday".

 

[lindsvancamp]

haha, i'm cracking up @ "aint nobody got time for that!"

My close friends and my sister know i stopped taking birth control a few months ago. So they stopped asking me questions. I sometimes reply with "i'm working on it" to other acquaintances. Luckily my co workers don't bug me about it, in fact they all tell me to wait!! haha.

 

[Lookn4sunshin]

Girl I totally know what you mean !!! It took me a while to get over that question in particular I generally just smiled and said when it happens then go hide and cry... But after a while I just began to say " when the time comes" if they continue to probe I say things they don't want to here like " 3 times a week no prevention" got any ideas?" Lol
ttc for #1 for 5 years now


I'm new here so if I'm doing this wrong. Please someone let me know

 

[jjbubbles28]

I say "we'll see. We're just having a lot of fun right now". Its truthful at least

 

[stml]

Glad I saw this post! I also get to face this question lot of times recently as my younger sister just got pregnant..!
I just hate it if someone asks me this question.. Even I am a kind of private person too!
I just say we are having fun together... And when it happens I will definitely let you know..

 

[MistyEyes]

I am over 40 and I still get annoyed by the question but I say " I'm having some challenges but I'm working on it."

 

[terripeachy]

I sometimes say 'When I throw up, you'll be the first to know.' But I totally don't mean it. Afterwards, the person is disgusted or happy and I never have to report back.
These are some great responses.

 

[tuesdaysbaby]

Oh yes, I need some of these.

I always sorta thought… "When we start trying, you'll be the first to know" - I've imagined saying it in my head but it's never come out.

WHY do people think it is their business?!

 

[babylaw720]

Well..... I get this question all the time.... and for my friends/relatives that already have kids, I say "I don't know, when's your next one due". And for the older relatives I tell them, "Its a surprise, I'll call you when Im at the hospital"

 

[Ariannda]

I saw a response somewhere where the woman started saying "Do you shave your vagina ?Oh im sorry, do you get uncomfortable when people ask you personal questions that are none of their business ?"

 

[May112]

Some of these are great!!! Hahaha

I too don't get why some people think it's their business to ask and/ or know. If you're close enough to me, I'd tell you/you already know the situation.

What I've been responding with lately is, "ask God." People kinda get it nd back off. I don't think it's anyone other than my families business that we're struggling, so if they reaaaaally wanna know, ask God. Simples. It's the easiest way to say leave me alone without being rude. But I'm aaaaaaalll for being rude, esp since they were first and bc it really is a personal Q that just isn't their business. Also, the ruder you are, the less chance they'll ask you again

 

[bromandapanda]

The people I work with are all about the same age which happens to be the typical "getting married/having babies stage" so by this point we all just say, "None of your damn business."

But to be on the nicer side, I say, "When you/everyone stops asking."

 

[Lirpa11]

DH has just come up with a good one IMO. A few people have recently asked us and he replies with well we have been trying for awhile and don't seen to be having any luck...

It makes them feel a bit awkward I think and the conversation changes. Or they go the opposite and tell me how they got pregnant while on the pill or just plain outta nowhere and I wanna punch them in the face...

*sigh*