Spouses with low sperm count.

[Briss]

WhiteOrchid, sorry about AF, how disappointing. I hope you will get lucky this month! I am planning to start IVF the next cycle. Going to call the clinic this week. they recommend abstaining between 2-5 days. we try to do at with at least 3 days otherwise I think his count will be lower

Melissa – welcome! I hope your stay will be a short one.

 

[baby25102011]

Just a little message to say my OH has low sperm count, motility and morphology and after 22 months bfp ...

Early days but there is hope, just as I was giving up

 

[CaliDreaming]

Congrats baby 25102011! Your hubby's count was similar to my hubby's, so your success gives me hope. Mine had motility and morphology a little lower, so hopefully we can raise that enough to get success.

I'm realizing how lucky we got with dd with dh's numbers. Hopefully we can get another miracle.

 

[melly2]

Hi Everyone,

Welcome Melissa!

Briss, sounds like you are on the right track with IVF. I'm sure you were hoping that his counts got better, but I guess this is the journey given to us. Anxious to hear how your IVF process goes.

My DH has not had a count since June, where he was up to 5.8 million. I think he'll have another one here in October. I've been quiet on the boards lately because there wasn't much to report. AF keeps coming, and in July, I think I had an issue with implantation, but not totally sure. I suppose I hold out a little bit of hope every month, but every month I'm disappointed. We haven't discussed any other fertility options at this point. We are planning a big trip to New Zealand, so we want to get past that and then come the beginning of the year, then we'll discuss IVF.

Good luck, ladies!

 

[WhiteOrchid24]

Just a little message to say my OH has low sperm count, motility and morphology and after 22 months bfp ...

Early days but there is hope, just as I was giving up

Congratulations! I hope you are keeping well and have a H&H 9 months! Do you mind me asking what his numbers were? Just for count, motility and morphology? Thanks in advance

 

[WhiteOrchid24]

Melly2 - a trip to NZ will be amazing! It's always good to have something good to look forward to. Things here are same with you - AF arrives every month and nothing changes. DH due to go for 2nd SA in the next 2 weeks so we'll see what happens then.

 

[WhiteOrchid24]

I know this thread has died off a little but just wanted to update since we just got the results from DH's 2nd SA. Turns out that his count is low (and always was they just never told us that!) - 4 million; his morphology has improved from 0-2% but his motility has decreased from 44% - 19% Any advice? Have already ordered Fertilaid so just waiting for that to arrive. Do you think it's still possible to get a natural BFP?

 

[Briss]

WhiteOrchid, I do not want to discourage you but we have tried various natural methods to improve DH's sperm over the last 3.5 years and it has not really made any dramatic changes. We've just done our first natural/modified IVF cycle via ICSI and unfortunatelly it's ending in chemical but at least for the first time we could see some kind of attempt at implantation. while TTC natutarally with low sperm count I do not even think we ever reached an embryo stage. My FS told us two years ago that IVF is our only option but I did not believe her. I have to say that now looking back I think she was probably right. We will be trying again IVF. I will still put my DH on supplements etc but ICSI is the way to go.

 

[melly2]

I do agree with Briss. We've been trying a year, and I see little to no chance of us every conceiving naturally. Like Briss, I refused to believe my doctor when he gave us the news that our only option was IVF/ICSI, but chose to try and get his count up naturally. Based on what I'm reading now, the chance of us conceiving naturally with less than 5 million is less than 1% a cycle. We're still on the fence as to what to do next. I'm open to doing IUI with donor sperm because there are genetic issues in my DH's family that I'd rather not pass along. We're going to discuss it over the next month or two and make a decision at the beginning of the year.

 

[WhiteOrchid24]

Hi Briss,

Thank you for responding. I'm sorry that your first attempt at IVF with ICSI didn't work, but it is encouraging about the implantation. As you said it's more than you have had in the past so that's really positive. I will keep my fingers crossed for your 2nd attempt. Are you having a break first?

I definitely find the MFI issue so difficult and it's so hard to understand. Like you and your other half there is no rhyme or reason why DH's sperm should be the way it is. We're healthy, eat well, don't smoke or drink a lot and both get exercise, yet it's just not happening. My only consolation with it all is after the results of the 2nd SA both our Dr and my DH seem to agree that chances are his sperm has always been like this so the positive part is we got pregnant with our son so it can happen, but it's just a case of when. I guess we got super lucky with DS as it only took us 5 months of trying (which of course at the time we thought was long!! How naive I was back then!!).

I have a feeling that we might need to go for ICSI, the problem is I just don't know if we can afford it as would have to pay for everything ourselves....sigh. In the meantime though I feel good that we are finally getting the ball rolling (so to speak) with tests etc. I'm going to see a gyno. to talk about tests (most likely HSG) and DH is being referred to a urologist. We're going to try Fertilaid for 3 months and I'm a big advocate of acupuncture so might give that a go as well although I struggle with how long things are going to take and don't want this to go on for another 2 years....

Anyway thank you again. Keep in touch with how you are doing and I will keep my FX that you get your BFP - whether through a miraculous natural conception or ICSI. Who knows I might need your advice and help re. ICSI in the future!

 

[Briss]

WhiteOrchid, I am ready to start our second IVF asap but everyone seems to be recommending to take 2-3 cycles break to increase our chances. It's hard cos I now think TTC naturally is hopeless for us and waiting hopelessly for a few months seems like a torture.

I understand re money, the NHS is refusing us funding as my FSH is high so we are paying ourselves, just using our savings, mortgage will have to wait...

melly, I hope your DH's SA will continue improving. let us know when you come to a decision.

 

[WhiteOrchid24]

The waiting is torture - I understand that. Hopefully the time will pass quickly though and you'll be trying again before you know it.

Melly - thanks for your message. I guess we were replying at the same time so I didn't see it til after my last reply! That's great that you are seeing such an improvement

Keep in touch ladies

 

[WhiteOrchid24]

I have a quick question and was hoping one of you lovely ladies could help me out!?

Since we've recently found out that DH has a low count (4 million) when it comes to TTC should we be BDing every day or every 2nd day? Normally we DTD every 2nd day then every day around about when I'm ovulating but now I'm wondering if we should just stick to every 2nd day because of the count issue?

Any advice/info would be greatly appreciated - have found conflicting info on the web.....

 

[Briss]

WhiteOrchid, basically to improve quality of sperm it's advisable to ejaculate as often as possible (every day or at least every other day) outside of your fertile period. around ovulation I think if you can plan to BD just before you O then you could have 2 day break before that to collect a bit more sperm i.e. from CD 3-5 BD every day or every other day until 2 days before O and then BD on the day of O or the day before O and continue every other day after that. for example for IVf they want at least 2-3 day sperm so I just think we could use the same approach for natural TTC.

afm, we are considering starting our second IVf as soon as AF is here (which might even be today)

 

[Briss]

Our second IVF miserably failed, but this time it's all due to eggs or wrong stim protocol, no idea but we had no fertilisaton and one egg ovulated early on its own, complete disaster. I am heart broken. DH said that's enough and that it was his turn now to take on the treatments. he finally went to see a urologist (first time in 3.5 years of our TTC journey!!). the urologist said my Dh has a "very fine pair of balls"…. nice to know men! they cant go on without their ego being constantly pampered. but tbh I am relieved cos I could not tell whether his balls are normal or not. Dh only produced one SA result and completely failed to show the doc his entire history which I so carefully compiled for him, not surprisingly the doc said with his sperm I should have been pregnant by now. really?? how?? Dh did not want me there which is a shame cos I could have asked all the right questions and provide all the information. Anyway, DH spent a small fortune on some basic hormone blood tests and another SA (which will have 100% alcohol content cos he showed up at 5 am drunk!). I really hope I can join them next time when they will be discussing the results cos I have much more to say on the matter. the urologist seems to be thinking it's my fault cos he said he will definitely try to improve his SA but he is not sure he can help us get pregnant.

 

[CaliDreaming]

Our second IVF miserably failed, but this time it's all due to eggs or wrong stim protocol, no idea but we had no fertilisaton and one egg ovulated early on its own, complete disaster. I am heart broken. DH said that's enough and that it was his turn now to take on the treatments. he finally went to see a urologist (first time in 3.5 years of our TTC journey!!). the urologist said my Dh has a "very fine pair of balls"…. nice to know men! they cant go on without their ego being constantly pampered. but tbh I am relieved cos I could not tell whether his balls are normal or not. Dh only produced one SA result and completely failed to show the doc his entire history which I so carefully compiled for him, not surprisingly the doc said with his sperm I should have been pregnant by now. really?? how?? Dh did not want me there which is a shame cos I could have asked all the right questions and provide all the information. Anyway, DH spent a small fortune on some basic hormone blood tests and another SA (which will have 100% alcohol content cos he showed up at 5 am drunk!). I really hope I can join them next time when they will be discussing the results cos I have much more to say on the matter. the urologist seems to be thinking it's my fault cos he said he will definitely try to improve his SA but he is not sure he can help us get pregnant.

Briss, so sorry about the second IVF. I'm glad you're still trying because I bet once you find the right protocol you will have success.

I'm not sure how the urologist came to the conclusion that your dh's sperm is fine when 15 mil/ml is considered the minimum for fertility (might take years and years though). Actually, many consider 60 mil/ml to be the threshold for "normal" fertility.

I think docs really do try to protect men's egos, which is unfortunate because your dh really needs to hunker down. It's too bad that your dh didn't want you there because what is the point of going to the doctor if you conceal the worst of your medical history? Hopefully the next SA will be the wake up call he needs. Next you will be there and can tell the whole story!

 

[Briss]

CaliDreaming, thank you. I really do not understand how I was supposed to get pregnant because even the SA my DH produced showed only 7 mil and I agree you stand a chance when you get something like 60 and 15 being an absolute minimum. Anyway, I guess he felt there is no point in a assigning the blame, I just really hope he might be able to improve DH's numbers so maybe we could get pregnant naturally which would be absolutely wonderful, tbh I lost all hope and am sinking into depression because we have really tried everything. there is either something fundamentally wrong with us or we are just tremendously unlucky…

 

[CaliDreaming]

Briss, Please don't lose hope even though I know it's hard. As hard as it must have been to have gone through the chemical miscarriage, that was a sign that you're on the right path and success is possible. Yes you have tried a lot of things but there are some tweaks that you can make in future attempts that could make a difference. Who knows what would have happened if that egg had not gotten away, or if they had used a slightly different protocol?? Also, maybe with the urologists help your hubby will finally get his sperm in order. It's amazing that you even got the last egg to fertilize in the first place with his drinking habits. Any little thing could make the difference. I must say I think there's a lot of potential if your dh starts to take his side of things seriously. I know you have been very dedicated to acupuncture and supplements so I think once that good egg comes along, if dh has done what he's supposed to, then you'll have your sticky bean!

You are down now but I can tell you still have a lot of fight in you. You're not ready to give up yet. Just take this time for a much needed break to regroup and focus on those little things that may not seem to be promising to you after the disappointments you've experienced.

I hate that some women have to go through so much to have a child, but it will all be worth it in the end.

 

[Briss]

CaliDreaming, thank you for your encouragements!! that means a lot to me! I will have to carry on fighting and will try to get DH's sperm improved maybe with some drugs and will most likely try more IVfs at a different clinic and so on and on. am just really tired of constant disappointment and it does seem like things are getting worse with every year we TTC (TTC and failing; going through all the natural things to improve fertility and failing; moving to Chinese medicine and failing; moving to IVF and failing again and again) and it's getting harder and harder to take all the kicks and punches that are in store for us with nothing positive to hold on to.

 

[WhiteOrchid24]

Briss I am so sorry your 2nd attempt didn't work (And also I apologise for not having responded to your last message in Nov - I must have somehow missed it) but I agree with everything Cali said. I know how disheartening this whole thing is and I can only imagine your pain and disappointment with IVF not working but as Cali said you have fight in you and perhaps a little break to stop and enjoy Christmas will get you raring again for the new year......

As for the urologist that is definitely a little frustrating but again I know how you feel......when we first got DH's SA back (the first one) our Dr (not a urologist - just regular GP) told me the numbers were fine! Because of the terrible morphology I didn't even think to ask what his actual numbers were and only found out in Oct that they are only 4 million!! I'm STILL annoyed about that....but again he was so optimistic that things can change so much and quickly. I think he was just trying to keep us thinking positively rather than panicking which I appreciate but at the same time I feel that DH needs to know the real picture and whether or not we can actual expect to conceive with the results he has...... But what my Dr said was that he has had patients that are perfectly healthy and have rock star tests and they just can't get pregnant for whatever reason, and then he has had patients who have terrible results - with the man/woman or both - and yet they manage to get pregnant, so I guess what he was really trying to say was it's just a horrible lottery situation and there's not a lot we can do to control it! I know that probably doesn't help but I just want you to remember to not blame yourself for anything - you are doing everything you can to be healthy and hopefully your husband will get on board as well and cut down his drinking, especially if the SA isn't good. I'm confused by your DH showing up at 5am drunk? Do you mean he gave his sample while he was drunk? I forget - what was your DH's last SA results? Was it just the numbers that were low or was the motility & morphology low as well? Is your DH healthy other than the fact he likes to drink? Ie. does he eat well, exercise etc? (Sorry - I just can't remember but I should just go back over the thread and remind myself!!)

Anyway I'm thinking of you and I know it's hard and you are allowed to feel crappy just now but when you can try and lift your chin up and get back into that positive frame of mind that it will happen - it's just taking longer than you hoped.

Lots of hugs

PS My DH FINALLY got a call from the urologist so he is seeing him in Feb and I am seeing the OBGYN in Jan so I'm hoping we might get some better answers and a new direction of how to proceed. In the meantime I have DH taking Fertilaid although just the regular one for the time being (he wanted to wait and see for a bit first before adding the additional supplements - men!) and he is only taking 2 a day.... no idea why but I'm hoping with the new bottle he'll start taking 3! Anyway it's all I can think to do for now until we've both seen the specialists and can go from there but this month marks the 2 year mark for us TTC # 2 and it sucks! Anyway I'm staying positive that it's going to happen when it's meant to and that we will all get that BFP! x