Stress/Breakdown

[Mrs Doddy]

Hi Caroline - I did go into work and sent my boss an e-mail, I can have the time off I want in a weeks time. I think it is very suspect that 3 days off sick no signs that she was ill and very happy considering (normally she is a bear with a sore head) - if she was just not coming into work then that really annoys me because I have been left working for two people and under the circumstances thats not fair. O well I will never know.

We will see what tommorow brings - I can only take each day at a time at the moment

 

[Caroline]

Hope this next week goes quickly for you, and that you feel better after your time off.
It is definitly unfair that your colleague has "gone off "sick. So many ppl say they have flu when they have a bad cold, but that takes the mick.
if she is having diffs coping then it would be much better if she got it out in the open, then maybe they could take on extra member of staff even if its only part time.

Take care of yourself
Caroline XX

 

[Mrs Doddy]

Happy and Caroline thankyou for your help and advice, without you I wouldn't have booked the time off or said anything to my manager - I am still dreading today and what she is going to say but so far she has been ok so I think it will be ok.

 

[Caroline]

Hope today was ok for you.
At least its the weekend (unless you have to work saturday like me ).

 

[Mrs Doddy]

Hiya

Yes its the weekend for me. I am trying to decide some chillout things to do

today was crappy - had the meeting with my manager on my own my collegue saw and when I got upstairs she asked whats wrong and what she could do to help (not sure how sincere she was - or if it was just because she saw me in the managers office) and she wasn't happy when the manager told her that a few things had to change - the suggestions will help but she got on the defencive and started arguing with her - this really isn't going to help sort things out - I really wish I worked on my own sometimes. Collegue told me that if I needed hel to let her know she often passes comments on why haven't I done x, x takes prority and has oftern been defensive and not very helpful. I don't feel that we work as a team - I feel that I let alot of things go just to keep the peace.

I am sitting here thinking I really want to call in sick on monday. In theory work should now be sorted though I am feeling crap and am not feeling happy that I have spoken to my manager and that action has been taken - I should be.

I have cancelled a friend coming round tonight, haven't checked my phone all night and this is really not like me, I just want to crawl away - H is out tommorow so I think i will.

Going to blitze the house, sort the washing, play on the wii and watch a dvd - then if I am really naughty I might go and buy the radley bag that I have seen - though I shouldn't but when I have my eye on something I have to have it !!!!! shopping makes me feel better !!!! though my bank balance doesn't !!

 

[Caroline]

Until things actually change I doubt you'll really feel better. Talking is all very well but if nothing changes so what, especially if your colleage doesn't work well with you. Sounds to me as if she likes to suck up to manager & make out she's the dogs what nots, when she probably isn't & knowing you've had a meeting with a manageer she's bricking it somewhat.

You enjoy your weekend, retail thearpy sounds good, at least you feel up to a bit of shopping, even if you can't face your friend coming round.

I couldn't go and pick my kids up from school when I was bad, I just couldn't face talking to them. I didn't even want to go out, all I wanted to was stay in. My OH had to cook too (normally when I'm at home I cook), i just couldn't face it.

Enjoy your weekend, sounds good (apart from the housework ).

I'm working tomorrow, followed by weekly shop in asda , then its home for tea & then getting washing sorted. Sunday morning is cleaning time, then afternoon is chill out time.
Monday we all have the dentist, which I hate, I'm actually terrified of going, although our new dentist is lovely. He made me feel quite relaxed but I'll still be a nervous wreck. I really don't know what possessed me to arrange it for my birthday .
So want to phone & cancel, but if I wuss out now I'll only have to go another day, and it could be moonths before we can get another after school appt. Hey ho.

See how you feel on Monday & if you really can't face it call in sick, if needs be go see GP.

Enjoy your shopping
Will be online on Sun evening if you want any support

Caroline xx

 

[Happy]

Mrs Doddy - I hope today went ok for you, it doesn't sound as though the situation is improving. I would really suggest some time off, the retail therapy sounds a great idea, I went out today and bought my first pair of maternity jeans and some tops. They are all a bit too big still but you cant be too prepared!

The past few days I haven't been sleeping and when I do all I dream about is work! To top it all off I now have cystitis and the antibiotics don't seem to be working so that's another trip back to the doctors. I'm due back at work on Monday but I still don't feel 100%. To add to the stress my Grandmother ended up in hospital on Friday evening as she could not move her legs (she has had cancer for years) she was refusing all pain relief and treatment but luckily my uncle managed to convince her to take it. I don't know what is going to happen to her now as she cant walk as she is usually really active, we are very close and this has hit me like a tonne of bricks.

I feel like a bit of a neurotic woman at the moment.

to you both. xx

 

[Mrs Doddy]

Hi Happy

I didn't go in today - you wouldn't believe it I tripped over a box at work on Friday and have really hurt my rib bruised or cracked it !!!! I spent most of the weekend in tears combined with the pain -called my manager and cried down the phone and said that I felt really crap. I have got painkillers from the doctor. I really wanted to ask for time off because of the stress but the words just wouldn't come out. I couldn't say anything to my manager either - i don't know why.

I don't know why I am still crying - the workload should be ok now and tbh I don't know why I have got myself in such a state in the first place - it really isn't that bad. I am a little peved at my collegue I sent her a message to say I wasn't coming in and could she do a few things for me, no I hope you are ok nothing.

I will take tommorow off too and see how I feel painwise - I have to go in at some point as I need to work sat to have next weekend off.

sorry to here you are not feel great either - have you tried Reiki at all ??? it is really relaxing and I have managed to sort my sleeping out.

Sorry to hear about you gran - I hope she is ok

we can be two neurotic women together !!!!!

 

[Caroline]

Big to you both, but taking care not to touch your ribs.
I hope they feel better soon Mrs D.
I'd milk it a bit if you can, take as much time as you can without jepordising your time off.
Your collegue sounds a bit of a sour faced moo.

Sorry to hear about your gran happy, and hope you feel better soon.
Cranberryjuice is good cystitis. I drank plenty when I was pg (the oceanspray stuff was on offer) and I didn't get it, but maybe that was just luck.

Sorry that you're not sleeping well. Hope you get some sleep soon. You need as much as you can get. Come third tri, I woke up every few hours, for a wee. I'm convinced its your body preparing you for the sleepless nights ahead.

Hope you both feel better soon.
Caroline xx

PS your not neurotic women, but if you are I'll make that 3 neurotic women
Off to watch House DVD now that my OH bought me, from the kiddies.

Hope you both have a better day tomorrow.

 

[Mrs Doddy]

Hi Happy and Caroline

How are you both ?? Happy are you feeling better now ???? Caroline I hope you are ok, I thought I would just give a little update on how I am as you both were so helpful and understood.

Well I went back to work after brusing my ribs and things seemed a little better - I was good to have a week off although in pain !!! my manager had had a word with us both (on my request) about the rota and how things should be done. My collegue was very put out that we were being told what to do and got very defensive and said that we were fine and how we did things worked. I found this hard as it is to help us both in what we do. I felt unhappy that she wasn't happy to try.

I saw a homeopath who gave me some stuff which I don't know if it worked or not - seemed a bit calmer but still got stressed ect. I have now left this as I couldn't afford the follow up and knew he would want me to try something else and didn't really have the money for it.

Collegue has been very difficult about any changes that have been made. We were told that we were moving to the office in the next town so there was more support as there is another person in that branch that does the same job - there is also more space - I am happy to go along with this however collegue has kicked up the biggest stink and was doing my head in. We have now moved and I am a little happier and am not waking up not wanting to go it but I am still having these horrible sicky feelings and anxiety that I am crap at my job and worried that it is going to get too much again (tho there is no evidence of this as we have been really good keeping up with the workload) I have my appraisal tommorow and am worried they what they are going to say.

H and I are off to Mexico for 10days on Sunday and am really looking forward to the break which I really need, then it is a few weeks to Christmas and only have to go in once for a few hours. I hope that things will be ok. Next Feb we are going to ttc and this is something else to focus on. I really hope that it goes well and it happens quickly.

I can only take one day at a time at the moment re work and the last two weeks (if you ignore collegues verbal diorreha) has been ok. Just have the stress of this week clearing my desk before I go away.

I just want to say thank you again for listening xxx

 

[Caroline]

Hi hun, thanks for the update, glad you are doing ok.

The move to the new office sounds great, especially with another body.

Your colleague sounds like a royal pain the bum. TBH I don't think you have anything to worry about with the appraisal it sounds to me as if you are good @ your job, and work with your manager to enable the office to run smoothly with the rota suggestion etc.

IMHO I think your colleague is possibly one of these ppl who looks like they're really efficient at getting stuff done, when actually they very little while every bu***r else picks up the slack. This is why she was so opposed to the rota as she would have to do her fair share and would be really obvious if she didn't. Also why she doesn't want to swop offices as this new person may also see her for what she reallly is.

Our CL fitter is like this. She huffs & puffs & moans about how busy she is, how badly done by she is, when in actually fact she's a lazy b***h. Her idea of a hard day is only getting 2 x 10 min coffe breaks a day when all her patients turn up. For me & another colleague thats an easy day.

Hope you enjoy your holiday.
And good luck ttc, early next year.
We are thinking of ttc next year but it will be later in the year than that. Hopefully you will have a bfp by then.

Take care of yourself
Caroline

 

[Mrs Doddy]

I am working really hard this week to clear my desk totally, go holiday and come back all fresh and try to keep things straight - will also have the other collegue then to talk to and hopefully work with - I really hope it changes as my mind needs to be on TTC not stressing over work as it is not going to help. I am so broody at the moment !!!!! Oooh I will maybe see you on the TTC board then !!!!!

Thanks
xx

 

[Caroline]

Hopefully you'll have your BFP before I get my bum over to ttc.

I'm sure with the support of another colleague things will be a lot better.

ttc will be much easier if your not stressed.