:( Struggling to get on board now that it hit me.

[ShakeItBaby1]

Hey ladies, I hope everyone is having a happy & healthy 9 months!

So just lately, it finally hit me that I am pregnant. This pregnancy wasn't planned, I'm not married to OH, I'm only 22. I feel like I've hit a rut because I just feel bad because I'm not exactly as excited as I should be . I feel like I'm way too young, and that my bub's will have an awful life. There's a few other contributing factors that make it more hectic, and I'm just terrified that my life is over, I won't be able to finish school, etc. My family is totally on board - but I'm just so scared & don't know what to do . Am I overreacting? I feel so silly.

 

[3xscharmer]

I don't think you're over-reacting, even those who plan their pregnancies down to the last detail still get doubts, think it's mostly hormones and totally normal. I think as time goes on you will adjust to the fact that you're going to be a mommy and things will fall into place.

 

[ReynoldsV]

Hi Shakeitbaby! I am here to hopefully offer some reassurance and hope. I am 20, going to be 21 when I am six months preggers. I am almost 3 months

Anyway, DH and I are in a pretty good place financially so we decided that it was time to have a baby. We TTC for a year and finally gave up. The month we gave up I got pregnant. Funny how life works huh?

I just want to tell you that I thought I was all on board for having a baby. I thought it was going to be easy. The truth of the matter is no one can sugar coat it and no one can tell you it will go one way or another. It is simply going to be what you were meant to have. EVERY experience is different and so is every child. As hard as it may be to see a positive side to things, ultimately you will think the way you want to and no one can change that. I too, am very TERRIFIED of not being a good mother. I feel this way even knowing that DH and I have awesome careers, we are stable, we have a plan and we have tons of family support. It is still scary.

I don't know how much you believe in a higher power or fate, but things are meant to happen at the right time. If you got pregnant, its because you CAN do it. Another thing I may add is that your hormones are going to play a LARGE roll in your feelings. Believe me. I LOVE children, I love being pregnant, but some days I feel SUPER depressed and I just don't want to do anything. I also feel like I am going to be a horrible parent. The thing I do is look forward to the day that those hormones will be M.I.A. Because they WILL! You will be thinking "wow, I sure was going crazy for nothing."

You will do great because that baby and fate chose you to be its mother. Try and be happy because babies can feel their mothers emotions. Also, try not to stress. I have learned the hard way that no matter what, things always fall into place.

I hope I helped! If you need anything, message me.

 

[want2bemommy]

I've wanted babies forever, and so does my husband. We're both in our 30s. Now I'm pregnant with twins, and very scared LOL. It's natural and hormones are raging. It's ok to feel like that- if you and your OH and family have love to give, you will be great parents as for school, you can go back. I was in nursing school until recently, and have to give it up doing clinicals because I can't fully participate. It's a bummer, but I will do it again. Babies are more important

 

[wahwah]

I know exactly how you feel. I'm 22 and my OH is 30 and desperate to have kids. So I went off my birth control. When I found out I was pregnant, I cried for two weeks straight. I felt like I wouldn't be myself anymore and I wasn't ready for my life to change.

I'm nearly 11 weeks along and I'm still not feeling excited about it. I'm hoping that changes when I have my twelve week scan. I know how you feel. You feel guilty that you're not excited and then that makes you feel worse.

I'm hoping it all works out in the end. Xx

 

[zanDark]

I don't think there has ever been a pregnant woman that hasn't wondered if she's ready or not!

Hell, we were trying for three years and had to have IVF to get pregnant, and I still got thoughts like "omg! what am I doing? Am I ready? Can I do this?" It's a completely normal reaction to something that you know is going to change your life!

And like ReynoldsV said, things are meant to happen at the time they happen whether people get pregnant by accident, or after years of trying...it happens at that precise moment for a reason!

Don't worry hun xx you have plenty of time to get on board and feel more confident before your LO gets here

 

[xheylove]

I'm 26 and not married, either. This baby was planned but I go back and forth between SUPER excited and incredibly terrified wondering if I did the right thing, chose the right moment, etc., etc. There are moments when I have no idea how I'm going to afford this, no idea how I will have time for everything that I need to do .. basically, at times, I feel like a huge ball of crazy, sappy, frantic, excited emotions.

I do think everything happens for a reason and I know that in the end, I'll make it work - because I have to. And because I have a support system around me that will help me along the way. You can do this - and you'll be so happy you did once it's all said and done. I think it's only natural to worry and to think negatively sometimes. That's the mommy coming out in you.

 

[mo0nangel]

Shakeit your baby will not have an awful life!! Babies are not demanding at all, all they require is love! And as for finishing your career you can still do that, there are manyteenagers that not only graduated from highschool but also went to college and a life for themselves. And you are specially blessed that your family is on board and support you! :
My pregnancy was an accident and we are scared bc even though my husband and I both work we dont make enough to live on just one income, and I really didnt want to have consider leaving my baby at a daycare, but you know what as a Christian I'm trusting in the Lord to provide for all of our needs. So hang in there!!

 

[nanamoon]

Totally, TOTALLY natural to feel like this. This baby (baby no 3) was planned, I've been desperate for over 18 months to have another and been nagging hubby constantly until he gave in but a week after my BFP the panic set in, proper full on anxiety panic attack...along the lines of...am I crazy, I already have two children, I had 20 months of no sleep with my last baby and only just got him sleeping through, we've got a lovely calm routine going and I'm about to throw everything on its head! What have I done?!

But now 6 weeks on I think I'm there, I still get the odd panic but the excitement does take over, you will be an amazing mum, every mum learns as they go, it's all trial and error, what works for one baby doesn't work for another....you'll figure school out. I had to leave my college course half way through when pregnant with my first but went back when she was 6 weeks old! Hard work, but soooo worth it! Everything has a way of figuring itself out

 

[iwannababe]

Hey I got pregnant at 23 b y accident with my first... I cried and cried thinking my life was over.... I was a party girl going to clubs taking party drugs and generally thinking I was having a great time with huby.... was pretty broke just lived to pat bills and party with the rest...then after a few days I realized that this was the start of my life and I was lucky to get the baby after all I had done to my body lol I don't regret any of it mind u But my point is I was not mother material and the I turned into the mummy of all mummies! And after baby was born and I finished breastfeeding I still went out for the occasionally drink and dance ( not like before though haha) and I finished my course. Went back to work after a year...my life is so much better after a child that I'm crazy enough to do it all again.....I'm telling u when u see that baby ull wonder How u ever lived without him/her

 

[ShakeItBaby1]

I want to personally thank every single person on here. OH Isn't as supportive, and when I bring up my fears - all he does is get mad . I know people plead and want children and are unable to have them, and I just feel so awful because there's so many things that I have left to do with my life I feel like I'll never be able to do. It's a relief I'm not the only one who is going through this. Last night I was bawling my eyes out because I don't know if I can do this, and I'm just absolutely terrified. to everyone who took time to post and help me through this.

OH is only 19, & already has a 6 month old son he's never allowed to see and the other mother of his child constantly tells me it's my fault that he can't see his other ds. She's taken drastic measures to ensure that my life is hell. She's already vandalized my car, and it's just so scary. Not to mention OH and my family don't get along so well . But I thank all of you.

 

[xheylove]

Sometimes I will sound angry and not want to talk about something when I'm scared. Perhaps he is just afraid he'll be in the same situation with you that he is with his ex. There's no way to tell but everyone handles stress and situations like these differently - it doesn't mean that he isn't necessarily 'on your level' with your emotions, he's just got a different way of dealing with them. But we're all here for you and when you gotta vent, do it. This is a big, exciting thing and we're allowed to be scared and worried at times. But we're tough, too. We got this!

 

[MommyGrim]

Hey, I was 16 when I fell pregnant with DD. Me and OH weren't together at the time and were actually on HORRIBLE terms. I was terrified, went through bouts of crying and being angry with myself, etc. I felt I wasn't going to finish high school (I was a Junior at the time, OH was a Senior) and I felt my life was over. I went and spoke with the counselor and she helped put some of my fears to rest. Having a baby changes your life drastically but for me, and many mom's I know, it's been for the better. I gave birth to my daughter the day my Senior year started but I was lucky enough to go through an online school so I was able to finish with an amazing GPA! I've currently finished my second year of college, all while juggling taking care of my daughter. My family has been an amazing support system and I definitely couldn't have done it without them. I know that it's scary and you will have to work harder but you'll feel that it's totally worth it!

 

[Louise88]

How your feeling is completely normal, me and my oh aren't married either and were on baby number 2 lol! Our 1st was a complete surprise We were both only 23 at the time and I defiantly didn't feel ready for a baby and while my oh got happy about the idea I wished it would go away because I wanted my life back! But then I got really ill at 7 weeks pregnant and got rushed into hospital I really thought I was loosing the baby and actually found myself crying about it, my daughter ended up surviving while I had septicaemia from a really bad kidney infection, they let me see my baby while they scanned my kidneys and it was the most amazing thing In the world watching her little heart beating and she looked like a prawn! Lol. She's now nearly 1 years old and I couldn't even put into words how much I love her she was the best surprise I ever had and since having her I've been able to go to college part time and plan on going to university next September to be a social worker so starting a family hasn't destroyed any of my plans for a career infact it just made me more determined to do it