Stuck....

[JWandBump]

Hey I'm JW, I have two beautiful children already, almost 6 and 4. I'm 25 and DH is 26

I could prob make a massive list on why not to have a 3rd like
- kids will be both in school come September
- my two are so easy
- we have a 3 bed house so 3rd would have to share
- I'm currently on tablets for health anxiety (low dose but still)
- hubby doesn't really want 3rd

Yet I feel like someone is ripping my heart out when they say no more kids I'm so broody it's unreal.

How decide or get over it or go for it?

 

[DanteRoman]

If your oh was onboard I'd say if your even considering it then go for it, no one ever regrets having a baby. Maybe tel your oh how your feeling and he might change his mind?

Sorry I can't be any more help! Xx

 

[xdxxtx]

I think this is something that your husband needs to be completely on board with. This is a decision that both of you have to live with for the rest of your lives, and neither of you want him to resent his own child. I'm not saying get over it. You have sooooo much more time to have kids. My mom was 35 when I was born, and she and I are extremely close. My cousin just had her FIRST baby at 43! I say give your husband some time. If you try to conceive without his consent, you'll lose his trust for sure.

 

[zoe2010]

I agree with xdxxtx. You're still young I'm 31 and we are just now trying for our first.

 

[storm4mozza]

Hey I'm JW, I have two beautiful children already, almost 6 and 4. I'm 25 and DH is 26

I could prob make a massive list on why not to have a 3rd like
- kids will be both in school come September
- my two are so easy
- we have a 3 bed house so 3rd would have to share
- I'm currently on tablets for health anxiety (low dose but still)
- hubby doesn't really want 3rd

Yet I feel like someone is ripping my heart out when they say no more kids I'm so broody it's unreal.

How decide or get over it or go for it?

Hi.
I went through this (I have decided to have number 3, our last oine) starting to TTC August this year. I have a 4 year old daughter in reception and also an almost 6 year old in Year 1. I had to do some soul searching when deciding especially since I have just went back to work last year after 6 years off.

My DH desperately wanted the third and I had decided no more kids. I am on anti depressents which I am now trying to get off slowly but surely I should be off them come March.. possibly April latest. and I realized that if I didn't have that last child which we are now planning, I would always regret it in the future when it's too late.

Have a proper chat with your Husband and see if you can come to some sort of compromise or agreement at least you will both know where you stand. On the topic of anxiety please ask your doctor about CBT theraphy which will help trust me, I had anxiety and still have panic attacks at times but this theraphy really helped by changing the way I think

 

[JWandBump]

Thank you all

 

[Fascination]

You could try explaining all of your reasons to your husband and see if he will jump on board (so to speak!) it might not necessarily be that he's against having another baby, he might simply be happy with how things are and see no reason to change the family dynamics. If he knows exactly how you feel, however, he might be persuaded. It's definitely worth an in-depth conversation, either way, if only to know for certain that he isn't overly keen to expand your brood. X

 

[lilmisscaviar]

We teetered for the longest time between having a third baby or staying at two. People assumed that just because we had a girl and a boy that we were done and the hardest part was dealing with questions once I became pregnant like "It was an accident, right?" Our third baby was by far the easiest of the three, she fit in like a book and I couldn't imagine my life without her. However, like others said, you can't force your DH to have another baby if he isn't willing. If he's never brought it up, it could just be that he doesn't think about it. I hope you both can come to some kind of agreement

 

[KalonKiki]

I also battled with the decision to have a 3rd or not after I had my DD. Our family feels wonderful with the 2 we have but in my heart I know I want that 3rd baby and I'd regret it so much later in life when it's too late if we didn't have at least one more baby. You should definitely talk to your DH about how you feel, if there is absolutely nothing that you can say or do to convince him to have a 3rd (he won't want one under any circumstances) then you'll have to find a way to come to terms with the idea of no more babies whether it's picking up a new hobby or pampering yourself now and then, planning family vacations, ect. If he does agree to it even if there are stipulations/requirements then I say go for it. It's always the things that we don't do in life that we'll regret the most at the end.