Tentatively here (again)

[spunky84]

DH said last March that'd we'd ttc which then lead to a total freakout and he said he didn't want another one.

Just as I accepted only having 1, preparing to quit my job to be sahm with LO, and possibly return to school in the fall, he decides he wants to ttc now.

I'm still on the fence, trying to figure out how he feels about it (like really feels about it). I've become okay with only 1, so if he decides (again) that it's not what we wants, I'm not going to have a meltdown. I'm letting him initiate all the other than any other time I just want to for fun. I'm keeping it as a "for fun" mind frame rather than ttc so that it's okay if he decides he's not up for it. (and it doesn't put so much pressure on him)

I told him if he really wants to do it now, I'd postpone school until next fall, but we'd have to plan for LO to arrive by no later than the beginning of July in case I need another csection & need that time to recoup - even if I had a successful vbac, I'd still need time.

If school isn't throughout the whole year and has summer break, then if we plan a June baby (not that our families need another June baby! lol), I'd be up for it while I attended school. So it's all kind of up in the air right now. I've not even been accepted yet. I'm just meeting with the school administration this afternoon and will go from there.

If neither of those options work then we'll wait the 2 years for me to complete school and then the extra 6 months to a year for me to get settled into a new job.

I've been off the mini pill since early March. First period was April 30th followed by a 37 day cycle (mine are usually 33-34). I still haven't ovulated yet based on cm and cp. So, I kind of figure any time this summer is going to be unlikely as it seems like my body is taking longer to bounce back from the mini pill than the combination pill.

I considered doing vitex, but I think doing that will push me into ttc mode which I don't think will do us any good, so I think a more relaxed approach is better. For both of us.

 

[Radkat]

Sounds like the relaxed approach is best for you. This is just my opinion, but I wouldn't put off school for this. What if you put it off and then he decides he doesn't want to TTC again? That would make me mad. Or worse, it takes longer than you expect to get your BFP so your trying, but don't have school to distract you? Just a thought... Good luck!

 

[spunky84]

Honestly, it's kind of a hard decision, but I think it's one that's best for us and our family.

The only way we could afford to have another is if I quit my job and stayed at home - which was actually originally plan (minus ttc). I thought about what I was going to do once LO started school and realized we'd be worse off than we are now as, even with 8 years current experience, no one wants to hire for barely more than minimum wage - so add a few year gap in there and I definitely wouldn't stand a chance.

I thought about going back after LO started school, but I'm not sure about just starting to go back to school by then (about 35).

If I go back to school now, I'd be home with LO during the day and would be going to school at night. Next spring I'd be continue my night classes & then would have them during the weekends as well.

I'm trying to get into a nursing program, so I know it'll be a lot of stress and a lot of work. Clinicals would start spring, so that would only leave me 1 day without school. DH and I discussed about being home with 2 (one very little) and doing that. I'd rather not, but also if that's how it pans out then I'll do it. I just worry about the stress that nursing school will already put on our family without the addition of a new LO.

I have to pass a test before I can get to the final interview, but given it's been 11-15 years since I've last learned any of this stuff, the next couple of weeks are going to be full of studying, etc. I have 2 shots to get in for this fall. If I fail both times, I'll have to wait until next year to re-test.

I'd love to go this year, but also if 2 weeks and another try just isn't enough time for this year, I'm okay with re-testing next year. It will give me an extra year to study, and DH and I agree that if I don't pass, we'll ttc asap.

We're still technically trying right now, but I don't think it's of any use as I've still not ovulated and am due for my next period in about a week. If I do, by some miracle, get in, I'm going to stay off the hormonal birth control and just focus on getting my body completely healthy & ready for when the time does come (which is probably better).

So, since I do have so much to learn/remember, it's highly unlikely that I'll pass to get in this fall.

I do think I might start up the vitex though, just to hopefully get my body ready so if I don't pass, hopefully that'll help get my body back on track as we need to plan for EDD to be before the beginning of July next year.