The feeling of guilt is eating away at me :(

[Kandl123]

Let me say this first, this baby is wanted more than anything and we tried for this baby too. This is our rainbow and I love him or her so much already!

But Here I am again, sat worrying and crying about guilt. Like the last time I was pregnant, which sadly ended in a mc. I'm worried that my 4yo will feel left out, I'm worried that all my attention won't be on just her anymore, I'm worried I won't be able to spoil her like I do now, I'm terrified she'll feel left out. I don't want that. She's my baby (even though she's 4, be 5 when baby is here) it's always been just me and her. Yeah my partner too has been there for the last 3 years. But me and my daughter have such a special Bond and I'm scared it'll go.

I don't even know if this makes sense what I'm writing. But yeah, I'm just filled with guilt of wanting another baby. All because I feel bad to my girl. Surely I'm not the only one that feels this way?

Help 😢😢

 

[emma4g63]

I feel the same..im very protective of madison and wen she seems very happy about her lil baby sister but i too think wen she needs cuddle n wat if im busy feeding i av to say no.breaks my heart hun but think its probably for the best as she is very attached to me and a lil less spolit may be good...

Im sure all will be fine xx

 

[Eegee]

I was hoping to leave a bigger gap between my daughter and a sibling, so I've been feeling a lot of guilt. I think the first few months will be hard but then she'll have a friend for life, and so will your daughter! There are a few down sides to having another baby, but sooo many positives!

 

[bunnyblonde]

There's always things you can do to make her feel special. And even tho she's little telling her things before you post them on Facebook or tell all your friends might help. This is a long time away for you, but I know someone who's baby shower was also a big sister party (I think her daughter was 3 at the time) and everyone got an equal number of gives for baby and big sister. Also if you have the time, maybe setting aside a special weekend trip or activity for the 2 of you now before things start getting hectic, even if it's just a movie and a trip to the nail salon. Just love her like you always have and I'm sure she'll be so excited about the baby

 

[mrssat]

I understand that some people feel like this but I gotta say I take a hard line on this one. I love my kids with all my heart & have a 3rd on the way I'm in love with already. I think kids sense a lot from mummy & I think if my kids picked up on my guilt they would feel something was off key & that in turn would make them wonder or feel like it's wrong that a brother or sister is coming into their life. If you know what I mean. If mum is kind of saying your getting a brother or sister with an apologetic tone the homes in on that & it sends the wrong msg & can create an issue.
My daughter & I were serious partners in crime before my boy came along but sorry to sound harsh she had to adapt because I wanted more children & I'm the adult. She doesn't know about baby #3 yet but when the subject comes up she isn't thrilled about another sibling but I don't feel one bit guilty!!

Don't feel guilty hun, not sure if you have siblings but I know I wouldn't be without mine & the memories we have as kids altogether are amazing! & my 2 would never be without each other.
Enjoy it!