The future..

[missjacey44]

This has been bothering me and just wondered what others thought, Am i being silly?!

I am still young and no doubt in the future, whether thats any time soon or in 5-10years i will meet somebody else and i would like more children. But this is what is bothering me.. My son is mixed race (his dad is half white, half black) so of corse my son looks mixed race, the hair, skin tone ect.

And im worried if i was to ever have more children with either a white man.. or even a black man and the other children were a different colour to my son now, Do you think he would feel different? left out?
espeshially because im 99% sure he isnt going to have a relationship with his own father but if my other children or child had a good relationship with their father.

And also, Do you think if i was to have children with another man, because my first son wouldnt be his but the other children are, He would leave my first son out and maybe treat him a little different? If you get what i mean?

I hope this makes sence!!!

 

[isil]

My Dad is not my brother and sister's Dad. He loves them like they are his own, he walked my sister down the aisle. My brother's wedding speech was all about how our Dad had brought him up to be the man he is today. I do think that in the future, the right man will love Tye like his own. I certainly hope that someone in the future will love Alasdair like that even though biologically, Ally won't be his. And I honestly don't believe the race thing will be an issue.

 

[mz_jackie86]

Hey hun my baby will be mixed race and me and the dad are'nt together so ive been thinking the same thing....
But the way i see it is you wouldnt go with a guy who treated your child differently anyway so before you had another child it would show if he were to act that way if that makes sense!!!

 

[xarlenex]

Race will only be an issue if someone makes it one. Maybe once he's older it will cross his mind, but I doubt he'll feel left out as such.
If you get a decent man he wouldnt leave him out. I think bonding would be a whole lot faster, easier and more natural with a baby that would be his own, but if you ever feel he was favouring one over the other you would just have to talk to him about it.

 

[Mummy&bump]

ye i agree with the others i wouldnt see race as being an issue!

if u think about it the right person 4 u 2 b with isnt goin 2 care what ur childs skin colour is! and if i met sum1 n they didnt treat my son as they wud there own then i wudnt see a future with tht person

xx

 

[AppleBlossom]

My dad isn't my real dad and my 2 sisters aren't my full sisters and I've never felt singled out in any way

 

[missjacey44]

Thanks for the replies. I know of course i wouldnt be with anyone who didnt treat me or my son how i feel they should which is why im never going to rush into anything with any man!

 

[Rachiebaby24]

ok here goes....

First off, Tye shouldnt feel left out. I have an older brother (mixed race - doesnt have anything to do with his dad - never met him), then there are me and my sis (who are both white - same dad - but we dont see him either as a he is an asshole) - then my little brother is 13 (mixed race - dad died when he was 3)

We are all close and always have been. I will not have anyone tell me that my brothers are my half-brothers or step-brothers. They are my BROTHERS and i love them so much colour doesnt come into it. Before my little brother was born, until the age of 15, my brother was the only boy and the only mixed race one. He came first too. My dad did "take him on" when he met my mum and even to this day my brother still calls him Dad....and my dad is white. He turned out to be a fool but anyway...there are men that it wont bother them. and you will pick the right man so it shouldnt be an issue.

My brother has never felt left out or anything and i truly think that it because of the love of our mum and us. Mum has never treated us differently.

Maley has two older sisters who are full black so it did cross my mind when i was pg with her but now she is here....she wont feel left out because she is mixed because i will make her feel its not an issue. Daddy loves her just the same as her sisters.

 

[missjacey44]

Thanks Rach thats made me feel alot better about the situation! And like i said before, i wont be with a man who doesnt treat me or my son in the right way anyway..