The one year milestone..

[mooncake76]

OK, it's been a year since we started trying 6 months of sporadic NTNP and 6 months of full on trying.

The past few days (I'm on CD3 now) have been very different for me. Normally I'm a bit weepy and blue on CD1 but then get excited about another try and get a new plan together, you know. But this month I've been hit hard and can't seem to get out of the slump as it all seems a bit futile. I didn't even get dressed yesterday. ALL my friends are either with newborns/pregnant or have just started trying. I guess we're at the tick tock age (we're all 33/34).

I know that this is not a long time compared to the struggles that some people have on here and up until now, I've always found my reserve of PMA but it seems to have gone missing. We said we'd go to the doctors if we got to Easter, but I always hoped that wouldn't happen.

I have also got a big grump on with my thermometer. I know this sounds stupid. I'm f***ed off with charting as it always raises my hopes (I always get implantation signs or triphasic) and ends up the same way. I also don't know if I should take charts with me to the doctors as from what I've read, they tell you off for bothering with something stressful. The charts show I'm more than likely ovulating and my lp is 13 days. This seems useful info to me but I don't want to take them and be made to feel like an obsessor, I couldn't take any knocks at the moment. Has anyone had a doctor be interested in these from the UK? I'm considering ditching charting for a few months but I am pretty hooked.

I've been staying quietly in the confines of my journal with some lovely peeps but feel like I need to hear from some more 1 yearers and tales of what to do next. Or success stories! All cheering up much appreciated. I might actually get dressed today, so perhaps that is progress.

 

[monalisa81]

Hi hun,
This is our 14th month TTC #1. I totally know what you mean. But, you may consider going to doc. earlier. It's no big deal. We went to have further tests when we hit the 1 year mark. I had a scan and some CD2or3 blood tests, DH had a SA. It's good to know if there is something that should be done. For example, DH's SA showed some non-sperm cells which tend to grab the sperms like a fishnet. Doctor prescribed an antibiotic and said all will be fine after the antibiotics are finished. If we waited for 18 months and find that out I'd be saying "why didn't we go before?".
About charts, I took my charts with me asked the doctor if he wanted to see them, he didn't even want to look at them. There are so many factors affecting BBT so I guess charting is not that scientific to doctors.
Good luck hun

 

[pinkfee]

Hi Mooncake

I'm just reaching that 1year milestone of TTC#1... actually if we add in the ntnp time i'm probably nearing 18mths more. But at that point in my life I didn't really care if i was getting pregnant or not each month so i kind of don't count it.

I've booked an appointment to see the GP for next tuesday... i've been charting for 3months now so i'm going to bring them along with me just incase they want to see them. I've got a bit of an irregular cycle, i.e one month 26days, next 28 days have even gone as long as 30days before. and I think my LP phase is short, longest so far has been 10 days. I just want to make sure i'm ovulating as otherwise we're flogging a dead horse each month!

DH is a teacher so he's going to make an appointment in 1/2term separately to get his side checked out as well.

I'm struggling with charting as well, taking the temp at the same time each day is starting to get me down on the weekends as once i'm awake i just can't get back to sleep, so i might still do it on the weekdays but just take it as soon as i wake on the weekends, as for the last 3mths i've not got a lie in and its killing me!

As for general moral, i feel ya... i'm 31 and lots of my close friends are pregnant and i'm not sure if its true but they're all saying its only taken 4mths, or they weren't even really trying which is just so annoying! Its difficult but i tend to buy myself something nice after the shows her ugly face and also enjoy a big glass of wine or anything that you've been not allowing yourself to have while ttc.

Its very difficult but if you think of all the things that not having a baby still allows you to do, i find they help me get over the slump. Example, I'm going to a wedding on sat night, where if I had been pregnant this month i wouldn't have been able to drink... my positive slant on old AF arriving is, i can now have a glass of champagne or two!!!

hope you feel better soon, i hate the AF blues.

pinkfee x
p.s are any of you ladies taking anything other than vits? a friend of mine was on agnus castus but i'm not sure about it, which is why i'm going to the doctors first

 

[Heidi_Lewis]

Hi mooncake76, this post isnt very relevant as Ive only just started ttc so who knows how long I'll be trying, but I just wanted to send you some support. I can feel from what you've wrote that you're going through a very low patch at the moment, and Im so sorry that you're feeling this way, but please stay strong, because it'll happen one day. If Im honest, if you think thats the way your doctors will react and they'll 'tell you off' for charting, well then I think it might be worth going to somewhere else which cares about YOU and what YOU want, and who will give you the support and advice you need. Keep at it, and hey! if you dont feel like getting dressed today, who cares!! Do what makes you happy xx

 

[mooncake76]

Thanks all of you. It is good to get some virtual support and also to hear from people in the same boat. This afternoon I'm getting a massage to relax me. I've booked a docs apt with a doctor that I like and also an acupuncture apt as I've found that to be very relaxing. And I did get dressed! I think the positive feelings are going to take a little bit longer this month but hopefully they will come back soon. Good luck to us all!

 

[mrsmax]

Hello everyone. Monday will be the start of my 11th month ttc. I am in the UK and went to the doctors at 8 months ttc (lied and said 10 months). I am 34 so worried about the clicking clock!! I had preliminary tests done and all fine, dh sperm fine. Off to fertility clinic next week.

I have good days and months and bad days and months. I keep thinking it will happen soon and then i think it will never happen. I will pass out if I ever see two lines on that HPT!!

This site def helps.

One word about GPs - my doctor laughed when i said I was charting. They think it is irrlevant - but is useful to me. JUst saw acupuncturist and they wanted to see the m- depend I guess. If it stresses you out - don't do it. For me, it feels like I am doing something (even if it jsut sucking on a thermometer!!)

Bad news in UK, as my local council restruct free IVF to under 35s and I am nearly 35!! Boo hiss. Hoping it won't come to that!!

 

[pinkfee]

One word about GPs - my doctor laughed when i said I was charting. They think it is irrlevant - but is useful to me. JUst saw acupuncturist and they wanted to see the m- depend I guess. If it stresses you out - don't do it. For me, it feels like I am doing something (even if it jsut sucking on a thermometer!!)

Thanks for the advice, i'll keep that in mind... i suspected that might be the case!

I've been thinking about trying acupuncture, how long have you been using it? do you find it relaxes you?

Hope it doesn't come to that for you either! Good luck x

 

[mooncake76]

Hello Mrs Max, totally with you on the approaching 35 feeling - it does hang over you doesn't it! My area currently isn't offering IVF to anyone at all boo hoo. But, yes, lets hope it doesn't come to that. Pinkfee, I really like acupuncture. So far it hasn't got me pregnant...but it has been amazing at helping with my periods, spotting and cycles. I've written quite a lot about it in my journal if you want a peek. I had a break the last couple of months but I'm going to go again this month. It is actually very relaxing and I never thought I'd say that. I would suggest finding one that is a fertility specialist and they are interested in charts. I hate that doctors belittle them - the temps change after ovulation - this is a fact! How is that not useful!!!

 

[mrsmax]

Mooncake - that is hilarious. I know exactly what you mean - how is seeing what day your temps go up (eg the day after you ovulate) not useful? And how is it not useful to know if you haev a long enough LP to carry a baby!! Nuts.

Wow - no IVF at all. Fingers crossed we don't need it!!

 

[sequeena]

The year mark is awful. Everyone has a hope of getting pregnant within 3 months

 

[Sparkles237]

i'm nearly at the year mark too, had someblood tests done and a scan went to get SA on OH done and they don't do it on the NHS in ym area anymore so we have to wait and save to go private for that test Anyways when i went to the doctor i told them i done my temp and everything and she wasn't interested actually said for me to stop cos there not 100% anything can affect your temp which is why doctors don't want to know.

 

[mrsmax]

i'm nearly at the year mark too, had someblood tests done and a scan went to get SA on OH done and they don't do it on the NHS in ym area anymore so we have to wait and save to go private for that test Anyways when i went to the doctor i told them i done my temp and everything and she wasn't interested actually said for me to stop cos there not 100% anything can affect your temp which is why doctors don't want to know.

Wow - sorry to hear none of your tests are on the NHS. What a bummer. How were the results?

 

[mooncake76]

Hey all. Went to docs and they're happy to do bloods and scan for me and SA for OH. But no, not interested in charts or the fact that I've had pos pregnancy tests and then got my period a couple of days later in fact, she said I prob had dodgy tests. Agh!

 

[pinkfee]

Hey all. Went to docs and they're happy to do bloods and scan for me and SA for OH. But no, not interested in charts or the fact that I've had pos pregnancy tests and then got my period a couple of days later in fact, she said I prob had dodgy tests. Agh!

I went to the doctors on tuesday and yes he didn't ask to see them either, although he didn't dismiss it as stupid, said it was a good sign that I had seen a shift in temperature. I asked about having a short Luteal phase (as mine don't seem to be longer than 10days) and he said providing i'm ovulating that shouldn't be a problem

I'm having bloods done in two weeks and he's requested a scan so waiting to hear on the date of that... OH is going next week to talk about an SA.

Lets hope everything is okay for both us and our other halves!

 

[mooncake76]

Fingers crossed pinkfee. It all feels a bit scary and unknown, but glad we're going to find some things out. Let me know how it all goes!

 

[lintu]

Hiya Huni, Im in my 15TTC cycle.

I actually got my on my 12th cycle, I went to FS after 10cycles, I have endo and a history of PID so they wanted to get the ball rolling early.

My Drs also werent interested in my 3 followed by AF on my due date, soon learnt not to test early

I was due for a lap to check out my tubes and remove any scar tissue from the endo in Feb, but due to and ERPC the mth the lap was due, it was cancelled. Anyway now that I have gotten PG and had it confirmed, they dont want to see me until August!!! guess they hope I will do it again on my own.

Good luck huni xxx