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tips to get through: if i don't get a bfp soon i might lose my mind!

stellargaze

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I've don't know how much more I can take! It's that last week before af is due, and I want to know so badly that I can't think about anything else anymore. My whole life revolves around ttc-- not taking hot baths after ov, trying not to take any meds or drink too much caffeine, or even eat certain foods.

I had really given up and was much less cautious the last year. But after a lap and a round of clomid, feeling hopeful again for the first time in long while. I don't know if I can bear any more disappointment!

Any tips on how you make it through each month? It's almost 4 years now that we've been ttc (4 years come november)-- and a very rocky ride. I thought maybe we can share the things we do to keep ourselves going through the ups and downs, and how you wait out those last two weeks each month...
 
It's a question we'd all like the answer too! But from my own experience, I just try to remember what I do have, not what I don't have! I have a wonderful husband and we have a great life together, just us, so I try and focus on that, and we make time to get away from ttc with fun stuff and weekends away etc! Wish it was just that simple but that's how I try to get through!
 
I don't even know how I make it through to be honest! Three years for us now. & it never gets any easier. Having a blog def helps me get out a lot of emotions and bond with people who are feeling the same way. Keeping preg tests away from myself during TWW is also a big must do! I will stress myself out to no end trying to find a line...

I read books about women struggling with infertility to keep myself off of the internet. I don't think there will ever be much that will help us not obsess. We want this so bad that it is like a part of us. Not easy to just turn that off. But I do recommend hiding tests, limiting your time on the internet, etc or you will just stress even more! Lol
 
Thanks, I know exactly what you mean-- it feels like it's become a part of us too. I spend way too much time googling, but as I work on my computer (online) from home, it's nearly impossible not to give in to temptation. I've more or less given up symptom spotting for pregnancy this month, but now I start spotting things that mean I'm not. I haven't tested yet and it's way too early, but I think I may cave in and test tomorrow at only 9 dpo... which I know is setting myself up for disappointment. I definitely won't make it past 10 dpo.

If I don't get my miracle this cycle, I am definitely going to invest in some of those books-- can you recommend some titles?
 
Well hopefully you won't have to get them because you will get your BFP :) but two good ones are
"Every Drunken Cheerleader... Why Not Me?"
and
"Silent Sorority"

I know what you mean about not being able to control it. I work online from home too. Plus do college online. There is no getting away from it!! Ahh lol
 
Thanks! Of course I got my bfn this morning :( I know it's too early to test though, but just couldn't wait. Helped me clear my head a bit. I feel like I'm back in reality now.

I downloaded samples of both books to my kindle and will start reading after work I think.
 
Thanks, I know it is-- actually, I realised this afternoon that I'm probably only 8dpo... The doctor measured my follicle size on a scan and predicted saturday the 3rd for ov, but I had a lot of pain on sunday afternoon-- at 3pm exactly. I ended up in hospital that evening and the scan showed that I had a corpus luteum on one ovary that released fluid into the abdominal cavity (which caused the pain) and so I probably should count sunday the 4th as the day. So I know that I actually did ovulate this month at least which is why I'm so hopeful again. Already started on one of the books.

I'm going to be strong and wait a few more days before testing again. I just haven't had hope in so long. We had actually decided to give up and to adopt instead. The same day we were headed to the adoption information meeting, I had a drs appt regarding abdominal pain (long story). The doctor told me he suspected that it wasn't intestinal but actually stage four endo which was causing my digestive problems. And then without me even asking about it-- told me that if I wanted to, he thought I could get pregnant. It was only a couple of hours before the adoption meeting, and I honestly feel like it was some sort of sign to us saying not to give up yet. It was just so strange to have a doctor turn and say those words to me after ALL of these years without me even mentioning our ttc journey, on the same day we had made arrangements to attend the meeting. The lap I had revealed that he was right. So it kind of feels like a miracle in the making.

Wishing all the best for you too!
 
Aw what a sweet story!! I'm glad you decided to keep trying. I hope this is it for you!!! Did you test again?
 
We have only been trying for a year, so I can't imagine how longer must feel.

We booked ourselves in for counselling and it has been amazing. We have not given up on our babies but I for one am enormously calmer and can now shrug things off that I couldn't previously. I have also not cried about it since we started the counselling. I would recommend it.
 
Thanks Cooch, I'm feeling a bit clearer, but I think it's because I've more or less given up on this month now :( A bit disappointed. Tested again this morning with an early test designed for a count of only 10 hcg. BFN. It's still early but the real reason I think I'm out is because I feel af coming on.

I tend to do well with books, so I'm definitely going to give them a try-- I'm a writer myself, and books have always been my solace.

I do think those immensley cheap online tests though have helped me calm down a lot! They sent 10 instead of 5, so I can test away without any stress. I think having an answer helps me the most.

I was invited to join a 'mums club' the other day though, which was a bit of an odd situation. The woman who invited me told me that not everyone involved has children-- I don't really get jealous, just reminds me more of what I want- probably not the ideal situation!
 

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