To santa or not to santa

[snowy-willow]

My mum is a secondary school teacher and they have some kids move up to the school in year 7 (11 years old) who still believe

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

I remember beliving in santa when I was littke. And laying in bed on chirstmas eve trying to stay awake and listening for his slay bells

I will be telling Aidan about santa. And leaving the milk, mince pie and carrot out this year. It just makes christmas so magical and exciting for them
xx

 

[PeanutBean]

I feel quite strongly against it. I will actively try and not have Byron believe though my parents did the same and as soon as they started school my brothers came home with it. I just find it deceitful. I'd have no problem talking about the symbolism and St Nick but no way do I want my kids thinking some ridiculous physics-defying Man is in charge of prezzies.

 

[marley2580]

I refuse to lie to my kids and tell them that Santa is real. BUT I do tell them that it's all a big game of lets pretend that everyone plays so we still write letters/leave out food for santa and rudolph/hang stockings etc. and I tell them that they're not to tell anyone that santa's not real because it would make some people sad. This is what my mum did with us and christmas was still magical.

 

[lulu61388]

i was always told that santa was real, he'd leave us a note telling us to behave the next year and my brother and i would swear up and down that we heard sleigh bells at night. one year a neighbor even dressed as santa and visited all of the kids on the street. my brother is 5 years older than me and bless his heart, he never told me that it was all fake. i came to the realization on my own, the notes were all in my dad's handwriting and my parents ate the cookies we left out. it wasn't earth shattering and i am not scarred by it by any means.

my niece and nephew are 9 years old now and they still believe. i don't see it as deceitful, the kids are so full of happiness and joy. it is all in good fun. i will tell my kids that santa is real as well as the easter bunny, the tooth fairy, etc.

 

[trumpetbum]

We do Santa. I don't necessarily think NOT doing Santa is a bad thing, or that there aren't nice alternate ways to do it like marley's example but I can't think of a good reason not to pass on this tradition to MY kids. All the children I know worked out gradually that Santa was just a nice story and none were traumatised. Dh says kids don't make a fuss because they suddenly realise they were duped and don't want to admit they ever fell for it . I think the trick is not to desperately try to keep up the pretence when the kids start to cotton on, but to play along as long as they do with a wink and a nudge. My eldest LOVED that she knew a secret that dd2 didn't, now dd2 is starting to have doubts.
I know some people are totally against lying to kids at all and generally I am very open and honest witht he girls but occasionally I do tell them a whopper. I mean, who tells their kids when presented with an indecipherable scribble.
'What a load of rubbish, come back when you have something decent to put on the fridge, I can't even tell what it is!!!.'
God no, we're all..
" oh darling that is such a beautiful picture of a doggy/cat/mummy/daddy/granny, it MUST go on the fridge where everyone can see it!!"

ETA: I also totally agree with skaterbun regarding commercialism and materialism. Christmas is not just about Santa. I think we have a good balance with our girls. This year they took part in a shoebox appeal and filled a shoebox using their own pocket money with toys for underpriveliged children. I wasn't allowed to open my presents until after mass when I was little as my mum wanted me to appreciate why I was celebrating the day in the first place. Dh thinks this is shocking It was just normal for me.

 

[smokey]

I dont remember a perticular time of finding out/being told it was fake, I think I just started to work it out for myself untill one year about 7 years old I leaned over my bunkbed early hours of the morning to find my dad eating santa chocolate and shouted at him "oooh busted" I got the normal "santa asked me to help out as he was running late"

Ill be telling Brian about santa for as long as he will except it, too much in life is a slap in the face of reality so why not make it magical as long as you can.

 

[PeanutBean]

I don't get why people who do 'do' Santa think there is so much fun as if Christmas wouldn't be the fun without it? Christmas will always be fun for little kids. Personally I think it's much more important to talk about the reasons behind Christmas. I don't think I can really even call myself a Christian these days but even so I'll make sure my children understand the religion behind Christmas and we'll share the story of nativity. I think as much a myth as Santa but it's the whole reason we have Christmas do it should form part of it and it can be just as fun.

 

[lulu61388]

well for me and my family personally, we are not religious. christmas for us is about giving, family time and love. we do all of that AND santa.

anyway, the only kids on my side of the family are getting to the age where they won't believe anymore so we will probably won't have a "santa" until i have children.

 

[JASMAK]

i think not doing santa, but celebrating christmas could backfire on those who are trying to save their child from later dissapointment. they would never experience the wonderment and magic of chritmas without it. bah humbug!

 

[Dragonfly]

I don't get why people who do 'do' Santa think there is so much fun as if Christmas wouldn't be the fun without it? Christmas will always be fun for little kids. Personally I think it's much more important to talk about the reasons behind Christmas. I don't think I can really even call myself a Christian these days but even so I'll make sure my children understand the religion behind Christmas and we'll share the story of nativity. I think as much a myth as Santa but it's the whole reason we have Christmas do it should form part of it and it can be just as fun.

santa was only part of it when I was growing up, I was dragged to christmas mass that went on and on and on and I just wanted to get hom and bed for the next day,. Plus in school we had naitivities etc,
santa was a dude that called with presents at the same time that was all. We had get together at grans then and always had fun. but that was until she died now no one really cares about getting together.

 

[PeanutBean]

Oh Dragonfly, that's a shame.

i think not doing santa, but celebrating christmas could backfire on those who are trying to save their child from later dissapointment. they would never experience the wonderment and magic of chritmas without it. bah humbug!

I'm not trying to save out on future disappointment, just think the whole thing is ridiculous but that aside, why should it backfire? You really think there's no magic to Christmas without Santa? I never believed and have had many magical and wonderful Christmasses.

 

[Vickie]

We will do Santa, personally I think it's fun for the parents and kids. I wasn't overly disappointed when I found out Santa wasn't real. I found out in my own way and was okay with it. Now I look back on it and remember very fondly the years of believing in Santa and I want that to be something that I pass on to Hannah

 

[smokey]

I don't get why people who do 'do' Santa think there is so much fun as if Christmas wouldn't be the fun without it? Christmas will always be fun for little kids. Personally I think it's much more important to talk about the reasons behind Christmas. I don't think I can really even call myself a Christian these days but even so I'll make sure my children understand the religion behind Christmas and we'll share the story of nativity. I think as much a myth as Santa but it's the whole reason we have Christmas do it should form part of it and it can be just as fun.

I dont think it makes it magical but it adds to it all, its like you dont realy need a tree or lights at christmas but you do to add to it.
Same as you dont realy for any perticular reason need a cake on their birthday but you still do it as part of the whole celebration.

You can have a very well ballanced religious and "comercialised" christmas, we do it every year.

 

[trumpetbum]

I agree that there are other ways to have fun, Santa isn't necessary to have a fun Christmas and not having Santa isn't going to give kids some kind of substandard festive statement but for us it's part of a family tradition, therefore part of something passed on and special to us as a family. It's also something we have in common with our extended family, our nieces and nephews and the grandparents all share in it. It woud take a very good reason for us not to include santa in our festivities.

 

[PeanutBean]

See to me the tree and the lights are the most important thing (after the whole family bit of course!). I'd much rather celebrate winter solstice than Christmas really. I have much more in common with nature than Christianity. But it is what it is so I'll engage with that. I just don't see that Santa does add anything. I'd rather my kids understood presents is something we by for each other because we care about each other, not something we pretend comes from some random magic guy. It just makes no sense to me.

 

[PeanutBean]

Actually I remember the last time this topic did the rounds, I pointed out that Santa as he currently is is basically a Victorian invention and prior to that, in Georgian times, he was called Old Christmas and was a great drinking decadent oaf! lol

 

[Dragonfly]

I just like the whole gathering around the tree thing and eating sweets and watching telly then if we are lucky some snow! I used to sit on my own as my fam dont invite me, me and mum dont get along so I am not welcome anywhere she is. She has never invited me to xmas dinner and told me not to go to my granddads which I ignored a few times and walked in and everyone was so happy to see me, which annoyed her. But I have my own family now so its different, I get to have all the fun with my child, I dont know about gathering a big family up as I dont like going up to other halfs i only got invited for the first time when I was preg with William seems they had to except me then. I never got to enjoy xmas when i was yoiung, I had a spoilt brother who I had to share oresents with and i never got to play with anything because he locked them in his bedroom. yes how many kids do you know actually had a pad lock on his toys in a wardrope and an alarm on his door he is so selfish. its only now i am loving the whole xmas thing as I want my son to like it to. He will know who santa is and why thgis day isnt just a day santa comes its also Jesus birthday seen though we arnt religious. Maybe he will want to be but needs to know anyway. When he is old enough to understand me santa will just be a part and not all.

 

[Dragonfly]

Actually I remember the last time this topic did the rounds, I pointed out that Santa as he currently is is basically a Victorian invention and prior to that, in Georgian times, he was called Old Christmas and was a great drinking decadent oaf! lol

wasnt it coka cola that invented santa? he used to be green but they turned him red.

 

[trumpetbum]

'Holidays are coming, holidays are coming' Ah it must be christmas...the coke ad is on