To save or not 23 week babies...

[LittleShark]

I was watching this programm last night and it was absolutely heartbreaking. I was even stopping the programm to run to the LO`s room and give him a hug. So, me and my DH later on had completely different opinion about saving the premature babies (born 4 months earlier) and was wondering what do you think - is it good to try whatever to save these babies even if it means to give him/her a complicated life later on?

 

[Babydreams321]

I missed this :0(

I personally think as long as there are no obvious mental/physical abnormalities which would stop baby having a good quality of life ( obviously this would be up for debate too though...... ) a babys life should always be saved if possible!xx

 

[Rhio92]

WSS /\ Oooh,it would be so heartbreaking x

 

[you&me]

As a mum of a preemie, I would not be able to answer this without being unbiased.

I don't agree with many of the things the 'medical proffession' stated in the program, but then other things I do agree with.

Until you are in the position of having a preemie, you will never know how you would be able to make those decisions, it is all good saying 'If that ever happened to me, I would do this and that, and I wouldn't do such and such'...but in all honesty?...when you are in that position everything changes...it is easier to visualise yourself in such a position, but for many of us mum's on here, it is reality

Saying that; us preemie mum's rock!!!

 

[GossipGirly]

I missed this :0(

I personally think as long as there are no obvious mental/physical abnormalities which would stop baby having a good quality of life ( obviously this would be up for debate too though...... ) a babys life should always be saved if possible!xx

u could never really tell the extent of the "white matter" damage though until development/growth

im not sure, each case should be reveiwed individually imo, its a very heart provoking subject and cant really be genralised as all babies are diferent

 

[Lellow]

Im gonna catch it on iPlayer tonight and then make a comment on here properly, but i cant imagine id agree with it to be honest, everyone deserves a chance IMO!

 

[LittleShark]

I missed this :0(

I personally think as long as there are no obvious mental/physical abnormalities which would stop baby having a good quality of life ( obviously this would be up for debate too though...... ) a babys life should always be saved if possible!xx

Apparently UK is country where such premature babies are being saved and resuscitated in opposition to majority of other countries in the world. Although with very very low rate of success....

 

[binxyboo]

I have just watched this on iplayer.
I thought the most profound person was the young lady (Heather) who was born at 26 weeks and is now 21 years old. She broke my heart.

 

[Dolly.]

I watched this and was in floods of tears in the first 5 mins!
I agree with another poster, I think you can't really know what it's like unless you have a premature baby.

 

[you&me]

I don't agree with putting a baby through pain over and over and subjecting them to a lifetime of hopitals, operations, developmental and physical disabilities to the point they have no quality of life at all...from my point of view, I would be doing it as a selfish thing, and for my own needs rather than saying goodbye...Personally, if medical intervention was required to such an extreme I would rather hold my baby, without the tubes, machines and attachments and let them be 'free' for their last few moments, and to slip away peacefully....then deal with my grief in whatever way I could, knowing that my child was no longer suffering....

...I would take my suffering anyday over that of my childs.

But then the other side of the coin, there is no guarantee of a healthy baby premature...or even full term, so many people take it for granted that 40 weeks comes along and they will pop out a healthy baby...this is not always the case.

When we was in NICU with Reagan, she was a 29 weeker, 2lbs 5ozs at birth, her only one setback was an infection...yet the baby next to her born at 35 weeks and weighing way over 5lbs was resusitated daily, he eventually left hospital on oxygen, and when I caught up with his mum month's later he had just been diagnosed as completely blind, deaf, having cerebal palsy, curvature of the spine and many more diagnoses.

There is just no guarantees when it comes to nature and babies.

 

[AppleBlossom]

Every child deserves a chance at life. Yes, there are a lot of "maybe's" and "what if's" but imo that isn't a good enough reason to let a baby die. I would rather have a child that could possibly have a disability than no child at all

 

[jogami]

I agree it's a tough one and nobody can really say yes or no defiantly until they are put in that situation. Would I do everything possible to save my preemie's life? Absolutely! If I was told that he/ she would not have much quality of life and would have so many disabilities they would really just be "living" as opposed to "living life" would I still persevere? I can't say I would want to live like that myself and why would I do unto my child that which I wouldn't want done to myself? It's like You&Me said, sometimes we have to let go, no matter how hard. For the good of someone so small and precious that you love more than life itself. I do believe they go on to be angels and what better knowledge can there be than knowing you did all you could but ultimately they are at peace and happy x

 

[you&me]

Most likely everyone that hasn't had a preemie will say 'every child deserves to be here'...yes they do, everyone deserves a chance at life, and that wasn't the whole point of the programme, it was only part of it...the biggest point for me was' when do we stop intervention?'...and that in my eyes; is when that child is suffering and will continue suffering...would you want to watch your child in constant pain?

NICU & SCBU is such a hard place to be, emotionally and physically, it is bloody soul destroying day after day, you feel helpless, and such immense guilt that your baby is born too early, too small and too sick, even with those babies in there that have a pretty starightforward journey it is still heartbreaking watching them being poked, prodded and subjected to so many things no person that small should ever have to suffer...you have no way of knowing if your baby is hurting (as an adult it hurts me when they stick needles in me) so a tiny baby it is hurting even more.

There has to be a cut off at some point, yes fight for your child, give them the chance of life...but at what cost (not meaning the money cost incase it is read wrong)?

 

[riohound]

I thought it was a really well made and thought provoking documentary although heartbreaking at the same time.I can see both sides of the argument and I would like to think that if i was faced with delivering a baby at 23 weeks,which has a very poor prognosis, that I would choose to allow my baby to go to sleeppeacefully in my arms without enduring lots of uncomfortable resus. However I know that its easy for me to say that when not actually in the position to have make that choice,and as i sit here looking at my children I know that my decision would likely be different if put in that difficult positionx

 

[GossipGirly]

[/QUOTE]I don't agree with putting a baby through pain over and over and subjecting them to a lifetime of hopitals, operations, developmental and physical disabilities to the point they have no quality of life at all...from my point of view, I would be doing it as a selfish thing, and for my own needs rather than saying goodbye...Personally, if medical intervention was required to such an extreme I would rather hold my baby, without the tubes, machines and attachments and let them be 'free' for their last few moments, and to slip away peacefully....then deal with my grief in whatever way I could, knowing that my child was no longer suffering....

...I would take my suffering anyday over that of my childs.
[/QUOTE]


totally agree...

 

[LittleShark]

Most likely everyone that hasn't had a preemie will say 'every child deserves to be here'...yes they do, everyone deserves a chance at life, and that wasn't the whole point of the programme, it was only part of it...the biggest point for me was' when do we stop intervention?'...and that in my eyes; is when that child is suffering and will continue suffering...would you want to watch your child in constant pain?

NICU & SCBU is such a hard place to be, emotionally and physically, it is bloody soul destroying day after day, you feel helpless, and such immense guilt that your baby is born too early, too small and too sick, even with those babies in there that have a pretty starightforward journey it is still heartbreaking watching them being poked, prodded and subjected to so many things no person that small should ever have to suffer...you have no way of knowing if your baby is hurting (as an adult it hurts me when they stick needles in me) so a tiny baby it is hurting even more.

There has to be a cut off at some point, yes fight for your child, give them the chance of life...but at what cost?

Maybe I`ve been quite selfish by thinking that EVERY baby needs to be saved at any cost, as it turns out (in the programme) that some of them don`t want the life (quality) they have after.

 

[AP]

The issue is not just the 'price'. Screw the price. Its about the parents having the choice. And right now, many hospitals will not offer that choice and decide on gestational age.

There needs to be a line drawn, absolutley. But 24 weeks isnt the right place.

You&me , we do rock. Like, obviously

I feel strongly because ive seen 23 weekers who have medically been better than Alex, but because of her gestation she got the chance. Just dont think its fair.

 

[mixedmama]

The problem is, it's very difficult to for-see the quality of life a child would later have. It's all a matter of chance, which is what makes this decision so difficult. I do agree that if it comes to a point where the baby is suffering, then it's better to stop all forms of intervention. Normally, a child could not survive without medical intervention, and if medical intervention is causing even more suffering, then it's completely useless IMO.

I haven't watched this program but I've heard a lot about it. x

 

[you&me]

The issue is not just the 'price'. Screw the price. Its about the parents having the choice. And right now, many hospitals will not offer that choice and decide on gestational age.

There needs to be a line drawn, absolutley. But 24 weeks isnt the right place.

You&me , we do rock. Like, obviously

Obviously we do

That was one of the parts that pissed me right off, they kept going on about the 'price' of it all, and how much it cost to keep a preemie in NICU...you can't put a monetary value on life...the nurses kept telling us with Reagan 'it costs so much a day for baby to be in this giraffe incubator'...'I am aware of how much it costs, I am eternally gratefully we have these resources, and trust me, if I had the money to pay you back, I would...every penny of it!!'...god forbid the NHS uses resources for alcohol and smoking related issues, when people are blatantly wasting their own life...so to start and maintain a new life to me is worth every penny!!!

 

[AP]

Yup the NHS hand out for minor things in comparison.