Told it won't happen for us-too old

[Casper72]

My husband and I went to our doc yesterday. It was our follow-up appt after 3 failed IUIs to see what our options are now. We were told that due to my age, it will not happen for us. We were also told that it would not be surprising if I got pregnant naturally, but that it would end in miscarriage b/c I am 39. We discussed IVF, but it cost $20000 so it's not an option for us. We were only given 50% chance of IVF working so that's not a guarantee anyway.

Needless to say, we left the doc office feeling very sad and hopeless. I suppose we will continue to try naturally but are not getting our hopes up. So that's it, just wanted to share and thanks for listening.

 

[Ella_E]

My husband and I went to our doc yesterday. It was our follow-up appt after 3 failed IUIs to see what our options are now. We were told that due to my age, it will not happen for us. We were also told that it would not be surprising if I got pregnant naturally, but that it would end in miscarriage b/c I am 39. We discussed IVF, but it cost $20000 so it's not an option for us. We were only given 50% chance of IVF working so that's not a guarantee anyway.

Needless to say, we left the doc office feeling very sad and hopeless. I suppose we will continue to try naturally but are not getting our hopes up. So that's it, just wanted to share and thanks for listening.

I am very sorry to hear that your doctor was so discouraging What is it with some doctors? Why on earth would he/she say that if you got pregnant naturally it would end in miscarriage because of your age??!!?? That makes me angry. 39 isn't old. Maybe I don't know your whole story, but still, doctors should be giving you hope. Or telling you what the issues are but then offering other suggestions (besides the super expensive IVF).

Have you tried acupuncture? Or even getting a second opinion? I have heard many stories of women/couples who are just heartbroken because they end up with a doctor without any bedside manner and with little to no compassion. And doctors not up-to-date with natural supplements, etc). TTC is such a personal and emotional experience, that the last thing one needs is a doctor who adds to your stress (instead of helping).

KMFX for you that you get a naturally very soon, and it sticks Don't give up hope, k?

 

[starlight2801]

I don't know your full story either but it sounds to me like you need to see a different doctor. How insensitive?!

It's ludicrous that s/he should suggest that you're heading for a guaranteed MC just because you are 39. What a load of rubbish!
There are many women who deliver a healthy baby at 39 and considerably older.

and good luck with TTC xx

 

[PositiveUs]

Hey, let me say that I was given a 5% chance with IVF, and believe me a 50% chance is really good for ivf. Really good. Seriously. It only gets as good as like 70% anyway. 50% odds are very promising. My friend is 34 and her chances were like 35% with an amh of 0.8 and fsh of 10 and she got pregnant with ivf.

 

[drsquid]

my doc keeps telling me my eggs are old (im 39) and thus isnt hesitant to go to ivf. but for a doc to tell you you cant get pregnant at all? that is crap. plenty of women have pregnancies older. perhaps ivf, perhaps donor egg and some natural. i have no doubt if i was willing to try iui a few more times (and with decent sperm) id get pregnant. you need a different doctor, and yesterday!

 

[readyformore]

I know that the statistics are not reassuring, but your doctor should have given you other options, or at least been more compassionate.

 

[2have4kids]

Geeese, sorry to hear that! What an arse of a doc! I don't know what your medical history is but I'd get on the coQ10 and find a new doc right away.
Supplement-wise that you can do without a doc... there's a clinic in NY that's posted promising info about dhea but if you decide to try it, have levels measured (dheas & testosterone). As we age, men and women alike, gradually loose testosterone and DHEAS. I got my gp to test and as I thought, I'm well below the minimum levels at the age of 36. If I IUI doesn't work we're going to try low levels of DHEA next. This supplement is specific to age related conception problems only though. And to me, it's a ray of light in the "old age" prognosis.
Whatever happens chin up and plow forward this guy sounds like a real twit.

 

[trying4four]

I'm so sorry to hear that Casper. I agree with the others though and think you should get a second opinion. Have you thought about coming up here even for a consult? Sending good thoughts your way!

 

[Mrs_Nesbit]

If the doc is as insensitive as that I'd hate to see what his bedside manner is like.

 

[trying4four]

Check out that You can tell that doctor where to go!!
Congrats!!

 

[Milliesun]

My husband and I went to our doc yesterday. It was our follow-up appt after 3 failed IUIs to see what our options are now. We were told that due to my age, it will not happen for us. We were also told that it would not be surprising if I got pregnant naturally, but that it would end in miscarriage b/c I am 39. We discussed IVF, but it cost $20000 so it's not an option for us. We were only given 50% chance of IVF working so that's not a guarantee anyway.

Needless to say, we left the doc office feeling very sad and hopeless. I suppose we will continue to try naturally but are not getting our hopes up. So that's it, just wanted to share and thanks for listening.

Total rubbish!!!!!

I got naturally pregnant with my daughter at 39 and gave birth 2 months after turning 40!! Totally symptom free pregnancy ( it was wonderful!). Not once did anyone mention my age. It was just me that was paranoid about it!!

A friend has just had her 5th child at 42 and another one is due anytime now (her 2nd at 42). Both natural.

Lots of women get pregnant in their late 30s and early 40 's and miscarriage is a risk for all women. I am not sure what IUIs mean, so can't really comment on that, but please don't think it's too late. 39 is young

 

[Casper72]

I've been trying to post to this thread all day and it wouldn't let me. Yes trying4four, I finally got a BFP this morning!!!! And to think I was pregnant in the office on Monday when that quack was telling me that it would never happen. I've proved him wrong once now I want to prove him wrong twice by carrying a healthy baby to term.

Thank you to everyone who responded to me. I appreciate you all taking the time to read my post. For those of you who were curious about my history, no problems to report at all with me. Tubes clear, ovaries good, all hormone tests good. I have 2 daughters ages 20 and 14. Miscarried 2 months before I conceived my 14 year old at 7 weeks along, but other than that I'm completely healthy, just 39.

I'm still in shock at my BFP. I have 4 tests all postive and went for a blood draw today, will get the results back tomorrow.

 

[Taurus8484]

I've been trying to post to this thread all day and it wouldn't let me. Yes trying4four, I finally got a BFP this morning!!!! And to think I was pregnant in the office on Monday when that quack was telling me that it would never happen. I've proved him wrong once now I want to prove him wrong twice by carrying a healthy baby to term.

Thank you to everyone who responded to me. I appreciate you all taking the time to read my post. For those of you who were curious about my history, no problems to report at all with me. Tubes clear, ovaries good, all hormone tests good. I have 2 daughters ages 20 and 14. Miscarried 2 months before I conceived my 14 year old at 7 weeks along, but other than that I'm completely healthy, just 39.

I'm still in shock at my BFP. I have 4 tests all postive and went for a blood draw today, will get the results back tomorrow.

Congratulations Casper

 

[NMichMomma]

Congrats!! As they say Anything is possible!! I hope you have a happy and healthy 9 months!!

 

[threebirds]

Wow, so thrilled for you
Wishing you 9mnths of h & h
x

 

[Angelicdragon]

Congrats on your BFP And there is no reason for your dr to have told you it would end in m/c. My OB has been optimistic all the way through as when I was 45 and pg he had a 49 yr old mum to be as well. Our RE told us he stops using own eggs at age 43.
Good on ya for proving the dr wrong and you can get a BFP.
BTW I got a BFP 2 days before my 40th b'day and Samuel is now 7 and Daniel I was 45 and he is now 3.

 

[greenjelly]

Congratulations Casper! Brilliant news! You must be buzzing! xxxx

 

[Ella_E]

Yay! Congrats to you! H&H 9 months! I bet you want to go back to your doctor and say "What was that you were telling me before??", lol. I'm so happy for you!!!

 

[never2late70]

My husband and I went to our doc yesterday. It was our follow-up appt after 3 failed IUIs to see what our options are now. We were told that due to my age, it will not happen for us. We were also told that it would not be surprising if I got pregnant naturally, but that it would end in miscarriage b/c I am 39. We discussed IVF, but it cost $20000 so it's not an option for us. We were only given 50% chance of IVF working so that's not a guarantee anyway.

Needless to say, we left the doc office feeling very sad and hopeless. I suppose we will continue to try naturally but are not getting our hopes up. So that's it, just wanted to share and thanks for listening.

Are you kidding me?
I am 41 and my hsuband is 39 we just had 3 rounds of failed IUI/Clomid/Trigger. My RE/FS suggested another round and my husband said "No, I don't want to waste anymore time. Let's move forward with IVF."
My RE/FS said that with my own egg we had maybe 10% chance of success with a Donor egg 45-50% chance. So the only positive thing your Dr had to say was that you had a 50% chance and at age 39 thats awesome!
You need to find another Dr for sure. One who doesn't give up so easy. I am assuming that you haven't even tried Femera or injectables even??
Don't give up!

Praying for you,
~Angie

 

[never2late70]

I've been trying to post to this thread all day and it wouldn't let me. Yes trying4four, I finally got a BFP this morning!!!! And to think I was pregnant in the office on Monday when that quack was telling me that it would never happen. I've proved him wrong once now I want to prove him wrong twice by carrying a healthy baby to term.

Thank you to everyone who responded to me. I appreciate you all taking the time to read my post. For those of you who were curious about my history, no problems to report at all with me. Tubes clear, ovaries good, all hormone tests good. I have 2 daughters ages 20 and 14. Miscarried 2 months before I conceived my 14 year old at 7 weeks along, but other than that I'm completely healthy, just 39.

I'm still in shock at my BFP. I have 4 tests all postive and went for a blood draw today, will get the results back tomorrow.

Man am I late to this party!!
So frickin happy for you!!!