Trying after Loss

[x-amy-x]

OH and I want to start trying for another baby as soon as possible. Although we only just lost Evie our desire for another baby hasn't changed. If anything it's increased. We still want a baby.

We are going to wait til my body is back to normal and we are not going to use any contraception in the mean time so if it happens, it happens.

I'm just really scared of people's reactions if I fall pregnant straight away. I'm really not ready for any insensitive comments from people who really don't understand.

We have also made the decision not to tell anyone when we do fall pregnant, which means, i'll never go over to the TTC boards and I wont announce it on here til as long as I can get away with really. Makes me sad but I can't be having everyone knowing if the same thing happens again.

Just really wondering what you all would do in my situation?

xx

 

[DiddyDons]

Hunni ignore what anyone else says. Its yours and your OH's decision. I dont blame you for not wanting to tell anyone My desire for another baby is huge aswell and Im still childless after loosin Sophie a year and a half ago I know one mummy who lost her little boy at full term has just recently given birth again to another little boy and she never told anyone at all.....only her husband and close family.

Hope your ok x x x

 

[Deeper Blue]

I can totally understand why you wouldn't want to tell anyone, and I think I would do the same in your situation. The only thing it may be worth thinking about is that people will work it out eventually once you start to show, and I know I wouldn't like people gossiping about 'is she pregnant again....?', I'd rather I tell them. But screw everyone else, you do what feels right, and good luck with TTC and your BFP.

X

 

[Pinkgirl]

Hey hun,

Firstly do not stop to think about what other people think. Why do they matter? If its what you and OH want, which i know it is, nothing should come in your way. The people who care will be there to support you and show you their love!

If you feel comfortable hang around her with us girles, hehe. I can see how what has happened has affected you so dont blame you wanting to keep it secret. I think to be honest there will be a point where you feel comfortable to tell us, but thats all in your good time. It might be at 30 weeks or it might be in the birth annoucement section.

Just remember Amy we will always be here to support you but like i said only you and your family matter.
xxxxxx

 

[bunnyg82]

Hey sweetie, just wanted to say, if it feels right for you and your OH, then it is right. Noone can tell you otherwise.

totally understand you not wanting to tell anyone.

You are more than welcome here in WTT sweetie

x

 

[moomin_troll]

i hate the way people judge others its sad to me that u and others feel like u have to keep something so special to urself thru fear of judgement.

no one should make u n oh feel bad for wanting another baby it doesnt mean that evie ment nothing to u or anything like that u will always love her.

i say good luck ttc and congrats when it happens for u x

 

[x-amy-x]

We do plan on telling people, when i start to get a bump. But with Evie that only just started to happen in the days before i had her. I'm very tall and my bumps take ages to show. We have decided to tell the parents after our 12 week scan, if and when we get pregnant again.

I just found it hard when people who don't even know me all come out of the woodwork and asked me really personal questions... but hey, thats facebook for you!

Thank you for having me in here!

 

[princess_bump]

oh sweetie ignore what anyone says, you and ian have to do whats right for you you're a wonderful mummy and its lovely to have you in wtt your always in my thoughts xx

 

[calm]

Do whats right for you always. If you don't want to post in TTC I can totally understand. Good luck and many hugs xxxxx

 

[FEDup1981]

you do what feels right for ur family, and if anyone has anything negative to say then you tell them straight. xxxx

 

[needausername]

Hun, if people are going to judge you on that then their opinions aren't worth considering.

I know someone who carried fullterm and then the baby died during delievery. A year later she gave birth and the baby survived. Everyone I know was delighted when she announced she was pregnant. Never have I experienced geniune happiness from such a large amount of people for one person.

Also having the baby so soon after her lost helped her with her recovery.

If you feel it is the right thing for you then do it.

 

[Jessa]

For me, I'm going to tell the people that I would like to be there to support me if the same thing happened again. It's completely up to you though! Don't worry about what other people have to say.

 

[Pinkgirl]

We do plan on telling people, when i start to get a bump. But with Evie that only just started to happen in the days before i had her. I'm very tall and my bumps take ages to show. We have decided to tell the parents after our 12 week scan, if and when we get pregnant again.

I just found it hard when people who don't even know me all come out of the woodwork and asked me really personal questions... but hey, thats facebook for you!

Thank you for having me in here!

Good plan my lovely. Long as you know we are always here to talk if needed.
Oh and just to warn you we are all nuts! lol seriously i worry about us at times!
We had a conversation about having a smiley that was peeing on a stick! lol
x

 

[Linzi]

WHEN you fall pregnant I don't think anyone would judge you for it at all. In fact I think people will be delighted for you. And anyone who says otherwise send them to me and Ill kick em in the nuts

I understand why you would want to keep it quiet tho, but remember that there are hundreds of people around to support you, whether you know them personally or not.

Best of luck with everything Im hanging around WTT/TTC myself now as well

xxx

 

[luckyme225]

Don't listen to people who are not going to be supportive I would keep it secret from friends and co-workers but tell my family only so I could have support if something was to happen. You know what is best for you and your family.

 

[morri]

Hi, big hugs for you, read your story on the board here .

I think you should try as soon as it feels right for you, it is nobody others business than you and your oh's .

 

[maddiwatts19]

i completely understand why you wouldnt want to tell anyone.. i just wanted to wish you all the luck in the world when TTC xx

 

[emma_27]

I totally understand you not wanting to tell anybody You and your Oh should go with what you happy with.

 

[Lou]

Hey you, Can I first say, Im so sorry for your loss.

Personally I believe that you should do what you think is right. Absolutely NOONE can tell you whats right and what wrong, and you most certainly shouldn't be made to feel as though you're in the wrong for wanting another baby.
In your position, I would do exactly the same, keep it between me and OH until we felt confident enough to tell people. That way there are no pressures.

I really wish you both the best of luck.
xxxx

 

[buttonnose82]

Hunny, those that make you upset are not worth getting upset over, those worth getting upset over won't make you upset. Noone can every judge you unless they have walked a mile in your shoes, unfortunatly god made us all with opinions and some people just don't think before opening their mouths, but also remember, god made us all with a middle finger ...... so use it all you need to when you tell those unsupportive people where to go

I doesn't matter if you decide to try for another baby today, tomorrow, next week or even next year, or even if you decided to never try again, it is up to noone but you and your partner. Whatever road you decide to take I am positive it is far from a easy decision to make. Concentrate only on yourself, your partner, caitlyn & evie's memory, noone and nothing else matters but those

Take care x