Trying To Conceive #1 Only Vent Thread

Discussion in 'Trying To Conceive #1' started by Wobbles, Sep 19, 2012.

  1. MacBunneh

    MacBunneh New Member

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    Hi all, this is my first time here but thought it would be the perfect place to vent my frustrations (I don't generally like to express my feelings, so find it difficult to talk to anyone I know about it). Been tentatively TTC for 16+ months and although we said that we would start off not trying, not preventing - every month has been like a failure for me.

    When I first came off BC in January 2018, I had very irregular cycles and then AF didn't come for 3 months. I went to the doc who gave me Provera, which didn't work, so she put me back on BC for a month. AF finally came and then my doc sent me for an HCG to check if there was a blockage in my fallopian tube (not a fun experience at all). Got the all-clear. Since then, I started taking all the right vitamins (Staminogro, Folic Acid, Omega, Agnus Castus), and my cycles have become a lot more regular and each cycle I get signs that I could be ovulating (CM) but negative OPKs.

    I've been doing a lot of research on nutrition for TTC and have just been trying to do all the right things. Every month before AF, there's a glimmer of hope and every twinge in my belly or feeling of nausea or breast tenderness makes me think "maybe this time" (damn that 2WW), but it never is. This time round, I had almost convinced myself that I was definitely pg, but then AF arrived this morning and I'm left completely deflated. I know I really need to talk to my husband about it, but he just doesn't seem as interested to go full out TTC as I am and is kind of in the 'it'll happen when it happens' mindset. Meanwhile, I'm just so impatient, and then of course all my friends around me are just popping out babies like there's no tomorrow, and I try my hardest to be happy for them on the surface, but inside all I can think is 'why is it so easy for them, but not me - what's wrong with me, why does everything have to be so difficult'. I'm trying to stay positive, because obviously stress doesn't help, but on days like this, it's just too hard.
     

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