TTCAL waiting (not so patiently) for our rainbows

[babytots]

Thanks Sunshine and Yazzy hope you two aren't far behind us and Mommy too. Hope your ok hun not seen you post in a while?

Yay for darker lines Babytots! Yes looks like July. Based on lmp my due date is 7/25/15. That's that bday of a dear friend of mine so I'm hoping it's a good omen! Love that you were drawn to that ornament. I think I need some inspirational words like that around me. I'm going to be on the lookout!
and sticky vibes to all!

Yay 3 days before me if I go by my lmp due date. Hope its a good omen hun I know I saw it and something just made me buy it. Going to hang pride of place on my xmas tree if this pregnancy goes ok.

Can't wait to see everyone's tests tomorrow!!

I tested again tonight picked up some more tests earlier when I took the kids to the town centre to watch the christmas parade and I've ordered some frer and digis that should arrive next week. Really can't afford them but hey-ho lol. Not told DH yet think will wait til af is late and I get it in writing on a digi. I get so nervous telling him lol. you'd think after 8 pregnancies it would be easy. x

 

[dan-o]

Babytots I get nervous telling DH too! I didn't tell him until past 5 weeks twice this year and I knew from 3! Silly really.

Roll on morning time!!!

 

[sil]

Haha babytots and dano I have the opposite problem! I show DH the test and he says "oh that line is too light to be positive it's just because your pee crossed there and made a dent" even though I point out it clearly has color. He won't believe unless if they're close to the same color or I use a digi. He thinks I'm not pregnant now even though he's seen the tests!

 

[Camichelle]

I'm trying not to burst into tears right now but I woke up because I had to pee and figured I'd test since I haven't since Saturday. I was expecting a good dark line by now but it hasn't progressed. My gut is that this is going to be another chemical.

 

[sil]

Camichelle, big hugs your way. I know it's hard, but try your best not to worry about lines this early. With my last pregnancy I did the same thing where I would test 1-2 times per day, and sometimes the line would be lighter or the same color and this could be due to a ton of things (drank a lot of water, test from a different package, etc). My worst tests are actually the ones I take in the middle of the night and my FMU tests. I always get darker lines with 2MU or afternoon tests even though the others should technically be more concentrated.

Thinking of you hun, and hope your lines get darker soon. I know how scary these first few weeks can be, especially after having losses. I'm super nervous too.

 

[babytots]

Lol dan-o glad its not just me. I hate that I can't make it a happy announcement because we all know that things can go wrong and we can't get excited so I put off telling him because I want to be able to get to a stage where we can be happy about it iykwim. He pretends things don't worry him but I know it gnaws away at him inside and I hate burdening him with more worry.

Last pregnancy I think I was about 5/6 weeks and had known from 3 weeks. We went on holiday and I wanted him to be able to relax without the stress a pregnancy would bring. Think I will just do what I did last time and send him a pic of the digi test lol.

Hugs Camichelle I wouldn't worry too much. If its any consolation my tests aren't much darker either but I keep telling myself its still early days and hopefully by the time I get past when af was due the tests will be much darker.

Hugs sil I think its safe to say we all are nervous but at least we can be nervous together and support each other. I'm glad I have this group.

I was wondering if you ladies could give me some advise on what you would do in my situation. Not long after my recent loss I fell out with a friend after weeks of being treat like dirt by her and she didn't make any effort to repair the damage she caused. Given that it was about a week or two after my miscarriage I felt extra fragile and losing her friendship pretty much sent me to rock bottom. I was in an awful place but after realising she wasn't worth the hurt or the pain I moved on and have grown stronger. But as a result I feel like I can't trust anyone.

Theres a group of ladies I talk to on facebook who are acquaintances of my ex-friend (in that they don't particularly like her but are nicey nicey to her face). Anyhow I would like to tell them my news once DH has been told but not sure if I can trust any of them not to say anything to my ex-friend. My last pregnancy was tainted with what she did and the breakdown of our friendship and I don't want this pregnancy to be about her in anyway I want it to be solely about my baby. But I feel bad that I can't confide in them as some of them I'm really close to. I've told them I've received some good news on a general post not thinking they would probe but they are all intrigued to know what it is. x

 

[Camichelle]

Thanks ladies. I know I'm probably just over stressing. The line is slightly darker and 3 days ago it was barely visible so I will try to relax. I feel like I'm just expecting the worse. Went for blood text and dr called to congratulate me but he just confirmed pregnancy-they didn't run a quantitative. He doesn't recommend we of an us or anything until 7 weeks because he said before that won't show much. I'm going to try and relax. I have 2 more frers left and then I am done poas! Lol

Sorry to hear about your ex friend Babytots. My advice would be to private message those on fb you are close to to share your exciting news but ask them to keep it quiet until you're further along.

How is everyone else feeling? Any symptoms for the recent BFP's? I have sore boobs and feel really bloated the last few days.

 

[babytots]

Hugs mine have got much darker today so that's a relief. That's great a blood test confirmed the pregnancy hun. I'm like you and just expecting the worst to happen.

I did think of private messaging my friends but I don't know who I can trust and tell in confidence. This ex-friend I told her about my miscarriage in confidence and she shared my new with other people when I wasn't ready to make it public so I struggle to trust anyone these days as she was one of my best friends

Symptoms wise tiredness has hit me was lucky enough to get a night of un-interrupted sleep (son slept in his bed all night rather then climbing into ours at daft o'clock like he usually does). Even after that I napped before I got my son from nursery lol.

Also having hunger pangs first thing in the morning and noticed my tummy was tender and crampy earlier so hopefully that means baby is settling in nicely x

 

[Camichelle]

This is as dark as my tests have got which has me scared. But because of my neg blood test a week ago I would think implantation occurred less than a week ago and it takes a few days to even show in a blood test so I'm hoping that's why it's light. I am officially done poas. Lol

Babytots that's so awful a best friend would do that to you. Maybe just wait a little to share the news until you're more comfortable if it does get spread?

It's comforting to hear you're tender and a little crampy because I am too and it freaks me out even though I know it's normal.

 

[sil]

Ugh, ladies, I am going insane. My FRER has gotten slightly lighter today at 13 dpo, but my wondfo has gotten slightly darker! Now I don't know if this is heading toward chemical or sticky pregnancy. Why would one brand get lighter and the other get darker? So frustrating. Here is my 11/12/13 dpo progression on both.

Wondfo:
https://i59.tinypic.com/8yt6qb.jpg

FRER:
https://i57.tinypic.com/3h6yr.jpg

Camichelle, I think your FRER looks great. I know what you mean, it would be much calmer if we could just step away from the pee sticks. Haha. I'm going to call my doctor today and see if I can get blood work done to ease my mind. Also, I've been very crampy as well. I keep running to the bathroom expecting the worst because of the cramps, but it's always nothing. The uterus is probably just stretching

Babytots, that is a difficult situation with your friends. Hopefully your friends will be able to respect your wishes and not share the news with your ex-friend. I wish I had advice, but I'm not sure really what to do in that situation. I am always here to listen though.

As for my symptoms, I haven't had too many yet. Slightly more sore boobs, crampy, and a little bit more tired.

 

[Camichelle]

I think your lines look great Sil. Better than mine and I think I'm ahead of you on dpo although I really can't be sure with no temping or opk's this month. Also I don't think the frer looks lighter. I think it's about the same plus the earlier one has had time to dry which makes it darker.

Uggggg I hate the not knowing and AFM I'm just not feeling very confident.

I keep running to the bathroom too.

 

[babytots]

Camichelle thats a lovely line I wouldn't worry about it.

Yeah I think I will probably hold off telling them at least until I get past the 7/8/9 week mark which is when I had my early losses. Hopefully I can think of something if they ask what my good news is.

The only people who know so far are ladies on bnb and my angel mummy friends who I met when I lost Jessica.

Yes cramps and tenderness is on and off. Perfectly normal at this stage though I keep half expecting af to show up lol.

Thanks sil you'll probably find me posting alot in here as its the only place away from people IRL and I do tend to moan on so be warned pahahaha!!!

Your tests look fab I would say that last frer is a dye fault rather then it being a lighter line as the top and bottom of the line is the same darkness as the middle test. If you compare the 11dpo one to the 13dpo one its a nice big jump in terms of darkness. The wondfos look fab! x

 

[dan-o]

I think everyone's tests look amazing! As for the FRER difference, pee dilution affects it so much as well! Don't worry!!

 

[Camichelle]

So my dr called and said he had the lab run the beta and it's 51. He said that seems on the low side based on my lmp but then when he saw it was at 0 7 days earlier when my other dr who wanted the back X-ray tested me he said that the number seems ok. I'm going for a 2nd beta Thursday morning so I'll find out Thursday if this bean is looking sticky. I'm still feeling pretty doubtful but fx'd. Feeling scared

 

[sil]

Thanks for the encouragement ladies, it makes me feel a bit better. I got my beta done today and will get results tomorrow.

Camichelle, going from 0 to 50 in 7 days or less is good! Remember, betas only need to double every 2 days so that seems perfect to me. Good luck on Thursday, I have my fingers crossed for you

 

[Camichelle]

Thanks ladies! It's so nice to have you guys to vent to. I think if DH knew how much I obsess he would think I'm crazy.

Fx'd for a good high beta # for you tomorrow Sil!

Anyone else having weird pulling like twinges of slight pain in the pelvic area? It's not really cramping but just occasional twinges. Not painful but I'm just super aware of everything right now. Hoping it's just uterus getting ready for a sticky bean!

How is everyone else doing? Anyone getting close to testing?

 

[dan-o]

How many DPO were you cami? I was 52 at 12 DPO with ds1 and that's was 100% as I had follicle tracking scans!

 

[Camichelle]

Ya know, I really don't know. Didn't temp or do opk this month so I was estimating based on prior months that I would have been 14dpo at time of beta but my cycles are longer than the usual 28 days and I'm beginning to wonder if maybe I O'd later. Idk, it seems low for 14dpo to me but it easily could have only been 12dpo. Ugggg, hate the waiting. Still have this nagging bad feeling but maybe I'll be surprised. At least I am praying that is the case.

 

[sil]

Feeling super anxious today. My tests still aren't getting much darker. I just want a nice dark line. I feel like they progressed a lot from 11-12, and then 13 and 14 are pretty much the same. I wish I could fastforward a week and know what was going on. This first week or two (or 12..or 40 if we're being honest, haha) is always so hard.

I am feeling twinges too. Lots of pulling, twinges, and random cramps. I still run to the bathroom expecting the worst. I'm trying so hard not to be negative but it's been hard.

 

[babytots]

Hugs Camichelle try not to worry I bet your next lot of bloods will have more then doubled. 50 sounds fab imo.

Hugs Sil try not to let it get to you that the tests aren't darkening. People assume that because the tests darken the hcg rises so when the tests don't darken it isn't but thats not the case. Pregnancy tests only tell you if you are pregnant or not and not how pregnant you are iykwim. So as long as a line is there then you are ok and your hcg will be rising I'm sure.

Afm its finally starting to sink in that I'm pregnant. Went and booked in to see my doctor monday and will be filling in the online form to send to the midwifes so I can get on their system. Just 2 weeks to go and I can self refer to the epu. Petrified of going for a scan incase the same happens and I see a healthy baby but then lose it but again I know if I didn't have a scan and left it to 12 weeks I'd be devestated if I had another missed miscarriage. This is so hard at times!

On a positive note my digi tests arrived today so shall be doing one of them in the morning and the nausea is kicking in (changing my sons nappy was making me retch).

Dan-o and Tasha how are you both doing?

Mommy, Yazzy and Sunshine hope your all well too and anyone else I might have missed. x