Wanting to adopt

[keepinfaith]

I am 32 and my husband is 34. We have been trying for awhile with fertility treatments to get pregnant, but they drugs cause me to get very sick. we are both successful and loving people. We want a child more than anything. We are ready to move forward with adoption, but I am terrified of the wait. There is a long waiting list with Lutheran Social Services, and i don't know what i can be doing during the waiting time to perhaps find a birth mother. I guess all we can do is pray...

 

[Lolly1985]

Hi Keepinfaith

Sorry to hear about your unsuccessful treatments and being so poorly. But congratulations on deciding to adopt

I'm not sure how the system works where you are We are in England and once we sign consent we get approved within the Government's set 8 month criteria, but then we wait as long as it takes to find a match. At the moment is is not too long as the system can be quite invasive so not many adopters are coming forward compared to the children needing homes. Hoping to be approved by early nexy year. Would love to think we will have our family by end of 2013

How long do you think you will be waiting? Is it private adoption and therefore no approval system, just the legal stuff? Sorry if this is ignorant, i'm just not sure how it works as this doesn't happen in UK, unless within family and even then social services are generally involved.

While we are going through the journey and waiting we have decided to get things in order so are in process of doing up our garden and are going to redcorate. I'm just finishing off my degree and we are on holiday in May. My mums 60th early next year and planning a family trip away, so lots to hopefully pass the time faster.

Good luck on your road to a family, Lolly xxxx

 

[keepinfaith]

Hi, thank you for writing. Today my heart is very very sad. I want a child more than anything in this world and it is so hard to watch others have one after another who don't appreciate what they have. I live in Minnesota in the US and the agency i am trying to use has a long waiting list before you can even be shown to the birth mothers. Their suggestion was to start their outreach porgram, where they basically help us try to find a birth mother on our own. I just dont' know how we will ever find someone on our own. I just want a child to love. I have my strong days and my sad days. Today is a sad day.

 

[Lolly1985]

So sorry you feel so sad I can totally empathise with that, I think anyone LTTTC or having had failed treatemnts will have the highs and lows And in saying that anyone who hasn't is often completely oblivious and insensitive to that hurt. I work with children and also have done 3 years studying early childhood with my degree so that always brings mixeed emotions.

It seems a very different system in the US, and very hard for you to just go out and find a potiential birth mother. Is there any system where you can adopt from the care system? I guess the good side for the first option is raising a child from birth which doesn't happen here. Waiting is always the hardest part with any of this Sending you my love

 

[girlnextdoorn]

Hi keepinfaith

I'm so sorry that you're feeling the heartache of wanting to have a baby and yet are facing obstacles at every turn. My heart hurts for you. It sounds like you are a believer in God..so am I and I've seen Him answer prayer in ways unimaginable. I'm praying for you right now. May God bring peace to your heart and mind and may He bless you with the desire of your heart in the soon coming days ahead. I work at Focus on the Family and we have a strong burden to help those who are wanting to adopt. You might want to check out some information in the ConsideringAdoption area of our icareaboutorphans website. Also, it may be worth your time to fill out the online form on Loving Shepherd Ministries' website. If you do, they'll mail you information on the different opportunities for adoption that you and your husband may want to pursue and connect you with an adoption agency. I hope this helps. Keep us updated, k?