amaryllis
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Okay, so I'll set the scene. My little sister and I dropped the money for some tickets to see Bianca Del Rio, winner of Ru Paul's drag race in the most recent season. We *love* drag shows, and BDR is one of the best. I bought the tickets before I knew I was pregnant. But I was bound and determined not to miss out on this experience!
It took me longer than usual to get ready. I am very exacting in my make-up, I'm one of those a**holes with loads of make-up who watches tutorials from professional make-up artists on Youtube. I was terrified I'd "get read" (be made fun of) by drag queens at the club, so I agonised over it all. All the time my sister and I were sniping with each other - she hates being late and she's menstrual, I hate looking like sh** and being clocked (noticed) for it.
It was all hormone-driven paranoia on my part.
We got to the club in time, and ended up waiting two hours before the act started!! LOL
Finally it's time for the show, and everyone bunches up at the front of the stage. I had to go sit down for five minutes because I was feeling really gross and tired, so I lost my close spot. This guy was in my space next to my sister, and I couldn't wedge back in (Sis kept trying to pull me in there, bless her). At one point when we were waiting at the front, I notice a smell hit me. It was hamburgers and poop. I turn to my sister and I say, "Oh GOD, the dude in front of us farted!"
My sister laughs and says, "How can you be sure?"
I point down in front of my stomach. His butt is RIGHT there!
"Dude," I say, "His ASS is right under my f'n NOSE!"
My sister laughs until the smell hits her. I have smelt so much of it by this time that my gag reflex has caught up with me. My brain ponders on what I'm smelling and then I start feeling REALLY ill.
"I'm gonna puke on this guy," I say to Sis, going green about the gills.
"NO! DON'T!"
"I'm trying NOT to!"
"You'll puke on ME!"
"He steals my spot and now I'm going to puke on him..."
"NO!"
.... "Okay I think I'm all right now."
Hamburger-chomping SpotStealerson in front of me is lucky I am early enough in the pregnancy that I can keep sh*t down.
So, a whole two hours standing in heels, no food, two lemon-lime-and-bitters (non-alcoholic of course) later and a bunch of make-up on my face (which makes me feel gross at the best of times) I am feeling like death.
Mainly because the lights and the "doof-doof" music triggers a migraine! Yay! Also because it's 11-12 at night and I'm exhausted! I was exhausted at 9!
Sis is a mum of a young toddler, I am a mum-to-be. We used to go clubbing all the time in our 20s. All we wanted to do was go home, snuggle down and watch TV shows on our computers.
"We are so old," I said.
"Yeah but I'm much happier than I used to be," replies my sister.
It was a great night, but I was glad to get home where I can get ahead of my symptoms with crackers, ginger beer and rest!
It took me longer than usual to get ready. I am very exacting in my make-up, I'm one of those a**holes with loads of make-up who watches tutorials from professional make-up artists on Youtube. I was terrified I'd "get read" (be made fun of) by drag queens at the club, so I agonised over it all. All the time my sister and I were sniping with each other - she hates being late and she's menstrual, I hate looking like sh** and being clocked (noticed) for it.
It was all hormone-driven paranoia on my part.
We got to the club in time, and ended up waiting two hours before the act started!! LOL
Finally it's time for the show, and everyone bunches up at the front of the stage. I had to go sit down for five minutes because I was feeling really gross and tired, so I lost my close spot. This guy was in my space next to my sister, and I couldn't wedge back in (Sis kept trying to pull me in there, bless her). At one point when we were waiting at the front, I notice a smell hit me. It was hamburgers and poop. I turn to my sister and I say, "Oh GOD, the dude in front of us farted!"
My sister laughs and says, "How can you be sure?"
I point down in front of my stomach. His butt is RIGHT there!
"Dude," I say, "His ASS is right under my f'n NOSE!"
My sister laughs until the smell hits her. I have smelt so much of it by this time that my gag reflex has caught up with me. My brain ponders on what I'm smelling and then I start feeling REALLY ill.
"I'm gonna puke on this guy," I say to Sis, going green about the gills.
"NO! DON'T!"
"I'm trying NOT to!"
"You'll puke on ME!"
"He steals my spot and now I'm going to puke on him..."
"NO!"
.... "Okay I think I'm all right now."
Hamburger-chomping SpotStealerson in front of me is lucky I am early enough in the pregnancy that I can keep sh*t down.
So, a whole two hours standing in heels, no food, two lemon-lime-and-bitters (non-alcoholic of course) later and a bunch of make-up on my face (which makes me feel gross at the best of times) I am feeling like death.
Mainly because the lights and the "doof-doof" music triggers a migraine! Yay! Also because it's 11-12 at night and I'm exhausted! I was exhausted at 9!
Sis is a mum of a young toddler, I am a mum-to-be. We used to go clubbing all the time in our 20s. All we wanted to do was go home, snuggle down and watch TV shows on our computers.
"We are so old," I said.
"Yeah but I'm much happier than I used to be," replies my sister.
It was a great night, but I was glad to get home where I can get ahead of my symptoms with crackers, ginger beer and rest!