Why are people so anti FF..rant

[kerrie24]

^
I thought it was bm direct from breast
bm from bottle
donor milk
formula?

I wouldnt go through the other options if I couldnt bf I would ff.Its for my own selfish reasons that I wouldnt want baby to be having someone elses bm.

 

[Dragonfly]

^
I thought it was bm direct from breast
bm from bottle
donor milk
formula?

I wouldnt go through the other options if I couldnt bf I would ff.Its for my own selfish reasons that I wouldnt want baby to be having someone elses bm.

well if you cant breastfeed you arnt going to get your breastmilk in a bottle. And that is the order of it as I mentioned. For myself I would give donor milk faster than formula.

 

[lozzy21]

^
I thought it was bm direct from breast
bm from bottle
donor milk
formula?

I wouldnt go through the other options if I couldnt bf I would ff.Its for my own selfish reasons that I wouldnt want baby to be having someone elses bm.

well if you cant breastfeed you arnt going to get your breastmilk in a bottle. And that is the order of it as I mentioned. For myself I would give donor milk faster than formula.

Erm no, your baby might not be able to feed directly from you but you still might be able to express.

 

[Dragonfly]

I am only saying the order of it.
https://www.eatsonfeetsresources.org/?page_id=720
you are right through mums expressed comes next. Then the rest there. Meaning formula is 5th .

 

[aliss]

The whole 4th best thing makes no sense. It's BM then formula. They are the options. So formula is number 2. Seriously, giving baby your own BM in a bottle is second best? Who thinks this stuff up? It's amazing we don't just top ourselves for being so sub optimal! I have very little guilt left over FF but that is because I have 2 very healthy kids so it's a waste of time!

Breastmilk from the breast
Breastmilk from the bottle (pumping)
Donation milk
Formula

They don't include "wet nurse" in this, only donation milk. These are the 4 realistic options for women in our society, it's not like you can just go get a wet nurse these days, even in poorer societies.

 

[dizz]

Not everyone who successfully breastfeeds has it easy and niether do we all depise formula feeding mums.

But you do constantly intrude and try to brow beat them into your way of thinking on here- EVERY single thread on this section ALWAYS gets hijacked by someone with a cow blinkie just reminding us, in case we'd forgotten in the last millisecond how we're doing the less-optimal thing. We get it, we know, pretty much everyone who's posted in this thread has mentioned that we know it and how it's drummed into our skulls constantly - and people regularly post brutally honest stories about how they agonised over coming to the decisions they came to... exactly what good is it doing their self-esteem, or their chances of feeling like a confident parent to rub salt in again and again and again, and deny that they could have possibly have difficulties or whatever - none... it's just a continuation of bullying and an attempt to feed your own ego in doing so.

If we went into the BF section waving formula pompoms we'd be banned in hours.

I dislike bullying - and far far too much of it goes on on the fucking infant feeding wars - from the BF/FF debate to the fact that every single bloody discussion on weaning, even when there are valid reasons behind the choice being made, gets shut down by the "woooo you just need to do BLW" brigade as well. Just for once leave the poor bad formula feeding mummies in the naughty corner in peace and quit the harassment.

 

[Dragonfly]

Not everyone who successfully breastfeeds has it easy and niether do we all depise formula feeding mums.

But you do constantly intrude and try to brow beat them into your way of thinking on here- EVERY single thread on this section ALWAYS gets hijacked by someone with a cow blinkie just reminding us, in case we'd forgotten in the last millisecond how we're doing the less-optimal thing. We get it, we know, pretty much everyone who's posted in this thread has mentioned that we know it and how it's drummed into our skulls constantly - and people regularly post brutally honest stories about how they agonised over coming to the decisions they came to... exactly what good is it doing their self-esteem, or their chances of feeling like a confident parent to rub salt in again and again and again, and deny that they could have possibly have difficulties or whatever - none... it's just a continuation of bullying and an attempt to feed your own ego in doing so.

If we went into the BF section waving formula pompoms we'd be banned in hours.

I dislike bullying - and far far too much of it goes on on the fucking infant feeding wars - from the BF/FF debate to the fact that every single bloody discussion on weaning, even when there are valid reasons behind the choice being made, gets shut down by the "woooo you just need to do BLW" brigade as well. Just for once leave the poor bad formula feeding mummies in the naughty corner in peace and quit the harassment.

Theres no need to wonder why there is a divide when people like you accuse mums who have badges as bullies. I never seen such a post full of hate, accusations and anger. I actually feel sorry for you thinking like that. It sounds like you hate breastfeeding woman. accusing them of feeding their ego. Just horrible.

 

[aliss]

Sorry, I didn't realize I was no longer welcome in this section!

 

[aliss]

Not everyone who successfully breastfeeds has it easy and niether do we all depise formula feeding mums.

But you do constantly intrude and try to brow beat them into your way of thinking on here- EVERY single thread on this section ALWAYS gets hijacked by someone with a cow blinkie just reminding us, in case we'd forgotten in the last millisecond how we're doing the less-optimal thing. We get it, we know, pretty much everyone who's posted in this thread has mentioned that we know it and how it's drummed into our skulls constantly - and people regularly post brutally honest stories about how they agonised over coming to the decisions they came to... exactly what good is it doing their self-esteem, or their chances of feeling like a confident parent to rub salt in again and again and again, and deny that they could have possibly have difficulties or whatever - none... it's just a continuation of bullying and an attempt to feed your own ego in doing so.

If we went into the BF section waving formula pompoms we'd be banned in hours.

I dislike bullying - and far far too much of it goes on on the fucking infant feeding wars - from the BF/FF debate to the fact that every single bloody discussion on weaning, even when there are valid reasons behind the choice being made, gets shut down by the "woooo you just need to do BLW" brigade as well. Just for once leave the poor bad formula feeding mummies in the naughty corner in peace and quit the harassment.

Have you ever considered that your own personal experience leads you to misinterpret normal discussion as some sort of attack/bullying? When perhaps there is no attack or bullying?

That is a genuine thing to think about... says this former formula feeder who is well beyond those years of guilt and pain, and can look at it through clearer eyes without extreme defensiveness.

I would suggest dizz, that perhaps you create people's malice against you when it doesn't actually exist.

 

[lozzy21]

There was no attack or bullying untill you showed up Dizz, just because you may have a BF blinkie doesn't mean you have never FF or have any advice to give others.

 

[kerrie24]

I wasnt aware I had a blinkie anyway?
I formula fed my first son.By choice,didnt even try breastfeeding him.Just because I breastfed too doesnt mean Im not welcome in this section.
I was browsing the whole forum and this thread happened to pop up and I thought I had relevant information to contribute.If you had wanted ONLY people who hate breastfeeding mothers and think we all hate you then you should have said...

I certainly wasnt bullying.

 

[Louisey80]

I agree with dizz why else point out more than once that ff is the 4th option!!!

 

[kerrie24]

Somebody else was asking what order it goes in,dragonfly said and I said I thought it was slightly different.I also said ff would be my 2nd choice as I wouldnt be comfortable giving my baby someone elses breastmilk,and I DONT HAVE ANYTHING AGAINST FORMULA.

 

[Louisey80]

And why are ebfeeding mums seeking out threads in the ff section. Hmm, looking for an argument!! I ff and look on the forum for support and advice, why would you need to be on here if you don't ff. I don't go on the bf one. Just my 2 pence worth.

 

[Celesse]

And why are ebfeeding mums seeking out threads in the ff section. Hmm, looking for an argument!! I ff and look on the forum for support and advice, why would you need to be on here if you don't ff. I don't go on the bf one. Just my 2 pence worth.

I glance at FF forums as I've combi fed both through choice and necessity and notice that sometimes people needing support in combi feeding post in FF section. I commented on this post to reply to the OP, specifically the bolded bits, to offer insight into this and to perhaps address some of the misconceptions appearing in the OP.

If it had just been a rant along the lines of "a BFer looked down on me and made me feel judged for FF", I would have left well alone... we all need to rant. But the OP implies that some women insist on continuing to breastfeed their own babies even when it isn't in the best interest of the baby. However that part of the OP seems to have got lost in the usual BFvFF debate.

Firstly this isn't a bf debate. We all know that all things being equal, breast is best.

But if the baby is hungry and you've tried the fennel tea and 100 other things to feed your baby, why would u still insist in BFing. There comes a point when the baby just needs food surely and if that's only available from a bottle then surely that's the most important thing?!

(And re-state this is not a bf debate and I am talking about when bf'ing simply isn't going to work, and everything has been tried but mums still won't switch to formula as 'breast is best!').

Rant over.

 

[readytotry]

And why are ebfeeding mums seeking out threads in the ff section. Hmm, looking for an argument!! I ff and look on the forum for support and advice, why would you need to be on here if you don't ff. I don't go on the bf one. Just my 2 pence worth.

Because there are always threads in this part of the forum about breastfeeding?!?

To answer the OP, maybe people try to continue breastfeeding because it is important to them? Doesn't mean they think formula is "poison", they'd just rather breastfeed.

Sometimes it is possible (and practical) to overcome breastfeeding issues, sometimes it isn't. It's up to individuals (and their health professionals) to choose how long they want to continue trying and it isn't anyone else's business. Nor is someone persevering through difficulties an attack on anyone else's choice (or lack of) about how feed their baby.

 

[leelee]

I expressed for a month with DS (latch issues) and then FF full time and I BF DD for 5 weeks and then FF. With DD she latched on straight away and although it was painful at first, I did enjoy it. Unfortunately I moved country when she was 3 weeks old and in dealing with all that my milk seemed to dry up (I was under a lot of stress at the time). I think I would have continued with BF'ing if the situation had been different.

I am not planning another baby, but if I did have one I would BF 100%. Nothing would get in my way of doing it.

Having said that, I do understand what a PP has said about BF taking up so much time. With my DS I felt really able to bond with him, as other people could share the load.

I have never been judged in real life, only on here. And TBH I wouldn't put much pass on what an anonymous person says over the net! I think BF is a long, hard journey and I have great respect for women that continue with it.

 

[Dragonfly]

And why are ebfeeding mums seeking out threads in the ff section. Hmm, looking for an argument!! I ff and look on the forum for support and advice, why would you need to be on here if you don't ff. I don't go on the bf one. Just my 2 pence worth.

You mean your accusation towards me. Maybe admin could sort you out a rule and make an even bigger divide where bf and ff mums cant speak to each other, if thats the case I will unsub. Would that make you happy, I am guessing it would. I was pointing out the order of feeding according to the WHO code , But I shouldn't have to say that as you can see that anyway, if you can possibly lift the vial of accusing others for a second. There seem to be so many in here that are actually anti breastfeeding, having a go at breastfeeders with badges and their presence in threads.

 

[lozzy21]

And why are ebfeeding mums seeking out threads in the ff section. Hmm, looking for an argument!! I ff and look on the forum for support and advice, why would you need to be on here if you don't ff. I don't go on the bf one. Just my 2 pence worth.

Just because they BF now does not mean they have BF every child. I no longer BF or FF so is that to say i should not be in ether section? Forums dont work like that, if im bored i will look through the forums where i might be able to give advice. The only people looking for arguments so far are FF with bees in their bonnets, every one else (both BF and FF) has had a sensible discussion.

 

[mrsbeano]

It seems as though everyone is attacking one another for feeling attacked. Clearly, how you feed your baby is an emotive subject but surely we can agree that out of the 4 or 5 options everyone does indeed feed their babies, even if it isn't how they would have envisaged.