Worried I'm having a miscarriage and my husband couldn't care less

[clara123]

I'm 8 weeks and started bleeding on Friday night and having pains. Saturday morning I woke up and my husband didn't even ask how I was he just got ready for work all carefree. I shouted at him that he could at least pretend to care so he was all of a sudden very caring and apologetic. He went to work and went straight out and didn't get home til 2:30 in the morning, he didn't even ring to see how I am.

This morning I got up with my youngest and said my husband could have him while I went back to bed for an hour. When I got up again he didn't ask how I was, he hadn't even given him breakfast. So I had to make the kids breakfast while he sat with a hangover doing nothing, I then took the kids swimming lessons, have come home and done some washing, made lunch etc. not once has he offered to do anything. We've got the decorators coming tomorrow so have to clear the rooms which he's left me to do on my own, I've been trying to move a heavy chest of drawers across the landing and he hasn't bothered to help me. I actually hate him right now.

 

[nilllabean26]

Aww sweetie. I'm so sorry ur going through this and I really do pray ur not having a miscarriage.


To be honest, I had a miscarriage earlier this yr. I was also in couples counseling during the mkment and quit mid session because we were talking about stupid crap and ignoring the fact how I was treated during my first pregnancy/miscarriage. (It was very early) but still. I was home by myself in this new state all alone and did Blythe get the help I felt I deserved. It wasn't until months later where he actually truly truly apologized acknowledged how I must have felt. He's been Blucher different this go around. I do get a bit sensitive for example when he gets out of the shower and takes too long to eat downstairs while I'm upstairs by myself, but I know he does need a bit of a break as well. He frustrates me a but but the way he shows he cares has been different. I think sometimes men are selfish and have no idea what we are going through


I remember in college, there was a group that protested against pms lol. They said women had no right to be rude or emotionally different on their periods and they needed to cut guys a break. I'm sure if thy had horrific cramps for days and in the hot heat walking grill class to class, they woupdnt be super chipper either. I've seen men help over splinters. I think women are very strong. I've seen some women on here with over 10 miscarriages and they seem so strong and brave. A man doesn't like his coworker and comes home like the tazmanian devil with estrogen.

I know u might not feel like u need to, but it's what some people need in order to get it through their thick heads.

Also when we get mad and yell "you could've at least. "It sucks, but the main thing they are focusing on is the attitude instead of the main point. When u are feeling OK and can calm down a bit..I think it woupdnt be a great idea if u had a one on one convo with him and explain to him how him treating u this way ajd ignoring you makes u feel. I'm sure there have been poetry of times when he's had a hangover and has acted like a baby needing ur help and complaining on not being able to do things. Communicate ur pennies,everything ur feelin g emotionally and ask how do u think u should feel. U should get the same excuse.but instead of acting like him, u have to push itself and still do what u feel ur incapable of doing or what's hard for you(sorry. Hope I make sense)
And it woupdnt be a bad idea to get him to download a pregnancy sooo as well so he can see image progressions of baby. After I had a miscarriage, I showed him the process and what it looks like and what was developing at the time. They feel more of a connection when educated. And having him see these things I guess made him more empathetic and sensitive to the situation

I know I talk a lot lot, but I hope u feel better and ur not miscarrying. Try not to stress. I'm learning to do the same. It's hard but u can do it: )

 

[nilllabean26]

P.s about u moving heavy stuff. Please please stop and rest urself. Leave it dead center in the middle of the floor.if ur not moving it, I don't care if it stays for a week. He will move it. Don't even ask. U shouldn't have to. But he shouldn't be expecting u to do it.: (

 

[laura109]

Oh hun. I hope the bleeding stops. You should be being looked after. What a selfish oh youhave right now. Just sending u my love xx

 

[supersherwolf]

God, I'm sorry that you're going through all that. Why have you not been treated for your bleeding and pains? You need to see a doctor, and take care of yourself first and foremost. Your husband's behavior is absolutely insensitive and unacceptable, don't move anything heavy AT ALL ESPECIALLY WHILE YOU'RE ALREADY BLEEDING! Make his lazy ass get up and do something!

 

[TTC 84]

I'm so sorry your having to deal with this , please don't over do it , make him do the heavy lifting . I really hope it's not a mc have you been to dr to get checked ? X