16 weeks and depressed

[mechelle81]

Hi all,

I was wondering if anyone else has been feeling low about their pregnancy?

I'm 16 weeks and 1 day pregnant and I'm still suffering from morning sickness, I'm really tired, I've got headaches and I'm just not enjoying pregnancy as much as I thought I would. I've also got some other embarassing side effects that are pulling me down and making me almost hate what should be a memorable and exciting time. I'm also so paranoid that someone will break into my house at night that it's affecting my ability to sleep and my DH's.

This is everything I've wanted for 18 months up to falling pregnant but I feel so blue. I've tried to talk to my DH about how I feel but he doesn't seem to understand what I'm trying to tell him. I feel like I'm sinking fast and I haven't really got anyone I can talk to, I'm so angry with myself for not being able to cope and for feeling like this.

 

[Imi]

Hun it's totally normal ...

I have had pregnancies from HELL, ill all the time, down in the dumps and sitting there going "why am i doing this" .... BUT

It IS worth it i promise you, Have to talked to your MW about any of this?? She isn't there just to keep an eye on you physically ...

I hope you start to feel better soon!

xxx

 

[Hels]

Imi is right hun. Have a chat with your MW. I had a great pregnancy physically last time, but mentally I really struggled. I have sinced realised that I could have done something about it, and am well aware of it this time around.
It is really common to feel low, and combined with feeling ill its a lousy feeling.
Big Hugs to you x

 

[Tezzy]

aww hun you're not alone!

when you have your head down the loo and you're so tired and you cant help but feel miserable!

im not gonna say it will get better because for some of us (imi and myself included) it doesnt. but here's hoping that your morning sickness will ease off soon!!

 

[Louise]

Join the club chick, Im feeling blue and Im not enjoying my pregnancy at all. I have not enjoyed it from the word 'go' and I really wish that I could.
Im full of anxiety, depression, you name it and ive got it.
Im almost 35 weeks and for me it just seemed to get worse and worse!
Whilst it's enevitable that almost all pregnant women will feel down at some point, many suffer more than others do, but im guessin that depends on your state of mind and positivity BEFORE you got pregnant!
Personally for me, I may have chose the wrong time to have a child, but thats not to say that I would turn the clock round and write it off like it never happened- I love my little one to bits already, but the stress and worry can get way too much to handle.
Your symptoms will get better and hopefully your sadness will too, but like me, (if you dont mind me saying), you seem to be a little more on the paranoid side of life!
I live like that most days, I convince myself of things that I have no control over. I loose sleep over it, I worry myself stupid sometimes...
Other days I sleep the hours away just to pass the time!

I know I wont be happy until I see my little boy- Im not saying this wil be the same for you, but dependin on just how paranoid you are, you may not stop your worrying until baby is born, and even then, im sure you'll find something else to wittle over! (if you're anything like me you will)
I cant tell you to try and enjoy your pregnancy (well I can) because coming from me its going to be way too hypocritical, but what I can try to advise you is, talk to someone about your worries etc:, about your paranoia. Talk to your MW/DR etc: I know their not there 24/7 and it's hard to get through things when theres nobody around to understand you, but if you want, you can always PM one of us on here if you simply want to chat!

I wish you all the very best with your pregnancy!!! x

Your OH may not understand you, but I can put my hand on my heart and say that I do, 110%.

 

[Tezzy]

Join the club chick, Im feeling blue and Im not enjoying my pregnancy at all. I have not enjoyed it from the word 'go' and I really wish that I could.
Im full of anxiety, depression, you name it and ive got it.

maybe your drs can see this and thats why theyve offered you extra care hun

 

[Louise]

maybe your drs can see this and thats why theyve offered you extra care hun

Yes thats exactly why they offered me the 'care' Im getting. But there's offering care to a person whos always anxious, and theres offering care to a person who's mental.
They're making me feel psychotic lol!
Oh well, Im sure Im not the only one who went through this crap. Pregnancy changes many people.​

 

[Tezzy]

its just you made it seem like they were offing you care because of your mothers behaviour and not yours! sorry if i misread.

im sure they dont mean to make you feel psycotic

 

[Louise]

its just you made it seem like they were offing you care because of your mothers behaviour and not yours! sorry if i misread.

im sure they dont mean to make you feel psycotic​

My mothers history was the main reason they got in touch in the first place!
They couldnt have been that concerned about my anxiety because when I asked what will happen if my axiouness stays the same, they said "nothing, because it appears you have been this way for years, and it hasnt got any worse"- lol. CHARMING.
God I hope you guys dont think Im a complete and utter drama queen, Im not. honestlyyyyyy.​

 

[Tezzy]

you say theyre not bothered about your anxiety but you just said thats why they offered you extra care? sorry hun but you're not making sense.

if you continue being stressed/depressed it can have an affect on your son so you have to be careful.

you think that you will be happier after your son is born? thats not always the case hun and if the extra care is there i would take the help just incase you get PND

(not that im saying you will)

 

[Louise]

you say theyre not bothered about your anxiety but you just said thats why they offered you extra care? sorry hun but you're not making sense.

if you continue being stressed/depressed it can have an affect on your son so you have to be careful.

you think that you will be happier after your son is born? thats not always the case hun and if the extra care is there i would take the help just incase you get PND

(not that im saying you will)

Without sounding mad lol (if thats possible) I worry, and I worry LOAAAADDDS about everything, mainly health. I was always going drs before I got preg because I was worried I had this that and the other... hypocondriac I believe? so when I got pregnant, they thought that the added stress of that will take its toll and make me 394857657 worse than before- that, added ontop of the crap my mother did sent out alarm bells.
They claim they wont know how Im going to 'end up', until my baby is born, which is why they're sticking around- they're saying it will either make me worse, or make me better, as I will have something other than my health worries to concentrate on etc:
If I stay the same after Nicky is here,thats it, they will leave me be- but if I go down hill and get PND as you said, then.. well, I dunno what they intend on doing to me.
But Im guessinf everything connects to one another? atleast it does when you;re reading from a dr's prespective and it's coming from a bunch of medical notes.
Know what I mean?
Everything looks mental when its all bunched up together.

 

[Tezzy]

i think you need to concentrate on being a cheerful/energetic mother for your son. if you act down/depressed around him it can cause stress for him, and you dont want that do you?

 

[Louise]

i think you need to concentrate on being a cheerful/energetic mother for your son. if you act down/depressed around him it can cause stress for him, and you dont want that do you?

Not at all no, and I do believe I will give my son the best start in life that I possibly can. But the past is the past, and certain things, no matter how hard you try, cant be changed
Sure, you can make a fresh start, ' a new beginning'- but whats done is done, right?
Did you say you got PND? If so and you dont mind me asking, how do you know you have it?​

 

[Tezzy]

yes i had PND and i was really happy most of the way through my pg and i had a great labour etc.

i made a post about it when i found out i had it... or just before id been diagnosed. i will find it for you if you promise not to stress out about thinking you will have it too!

 

[Louise]

yes i had PND and i was really happy most of the way through my pg and i had a great labour etc.

i made a post about it when i found out i had it... or just before id been diagnosed. i will find it for you if you promise not to stress out about thinking you will have it too!

lol. wow, you guys seem to know me all too well already, Thats frightening.
Yea, I would love to read your experience and how you dealt with it etc: It may help me out a little more.
x thanks x​

 

[Tezzy]

https://www.babyandbump.com/showthread.php?t=3768

 

[Tezzy]

https://www.babyandbump.com/showthread.php?t=2896 heres another one

 

[Tezzy]

and another

https://www.babyandbump.com/showthread.php?t=3836

 

[Louise]

https://www.babyandbump.com/showthread.php?t=3768

Wow, Its hard to describe what I thought when I read that- if I say "it sounds like me" to some extent, you'll just think Im being paranoid, right?​

Honestly though, ya know what? a certain part of that thread made me think of something I said a few months back, i'll quote you 'I love my son, Im sure I do'; well a HV asked me that question when I went to the hospital, I dont know how we got talking about it but she said 'you love your baby, dont you'? and ya know what, I felt as though I HAD to say yes, because if I said what I truely felt, which was 'He's not even here yet, how can you love something thats not even born', I was scared that I would sound off my trolly, and I worried that they would think Im not cut out to be a mother. So I told them what they wanted to hear!
I also went through a stage where I would look at my 4d scans and see nothing more than a child, I didnt look at it and see my son, I saw a baby and I was too scared to mention this to anyone. When I finally said something to the MW she said it will change when he's born, but what if it doesnt? Now I just tell them all what they want to hear because like you said in your post, I dont wanna admit that I may have a problem.
Thanks for letting me read that!

 

[Tezzy]

its best to get help, honestly

i love being a mum now! me aand rhys have bonded andstuff. even though sometimes i still get a bit down if hes screaming or wont eat etc!

it took me about 3 months to get over my pnd... maybe a bit longer if im honest!