craquinette
Expecting #3
- Joined
- Mar 26, 2015
- Messages
- 114
- Reaction score
- 4
It looks like I'm far from the only one in this situation.... I have a little boy already, and found out last week I'm having another one.
I'm devastated.
Growing up, I wasn't even sure I wanted kids but always said "if I have a child, I really really hope it's a girl".
I only changed my mind about boys a few years ago when my nephew was born, I thought "actually boys may not be that bad after all".
When I was pregnant with my first, we kept it a surprise, and I didn't really mind either way because we wanted more than one child, and so I thought that if it was a boy, I would still have a chance to have a girl for the second one. And I actually liked the idea of the oldest being a boy. So even if I was sligthly disappointed when he was born, that didn't last at all.
However, now that I know I'm having 2 boys, I feel completely lost. I never ever pictured myself with two boys. I always felt bad for my friends who had 2 boys (and I still do, except now I'll be one of them too...).
I cried all week-end feeling sorry for myself.
I wasn't even interested in my 18 month old, looking at him just made me cry even more thinking I'll have 2 boys soon.
I feel horribly guilty to be that way. I have loved my boy so much since the day he was born, but now I actually feel completely disconnected. And that scares me. What if it doesn't come back? What if I never bond with the second one?
I knew I would be disappointed if it was a boy (and that's why I wanted to know before the birth, so I would have time to get used to the idea) but never thought it would be that bad....
I'm devastated.
Growing up, I wasn't even sure I wanted kids but always said "if I have a child, I really really hope it's a girl".
I only changed my mind about boys a few years ago when my nephew was born, I thought "actually boys may not be that bad after all".
When I was pregnant with my first, we kept it a surprise, and I didn't really mind either way because we wanted more than one child, and so I thought that if it was a boy, I would still have a chance to have a girl for the second one. And I actually liked the idea of the oldest being a boy. So even if I was sligthly disappointed when he was born, that didn't last at all.
However, now that I know I'm having 2 boys, I feel completely lost. I never ever pictured myself with two boys. I always felt bad for my friends who had 2 boys (and I still do, except now I'll be one of them too...).
I cried all week-end feeling sorry for myself.
I wasn't even interested in my 18 month old, looking at him just made me cry even more thinking I'll have 2 boys soon.
I feel horribly guilty to be that way. I have loved my boy so much since the day he was born, but now I actually feel completely disconnected. And that scares me. What if it doesn't come back? What if I never bond with the second one?
I knew I would be disappointed if it was a boy (and that's why I wanted to know before the birth, so I would have time to get used to the idea) but never thought it would be that bad....