2015 September Sweet Peas!!! all welcome to join

[aries_22043]

littleone - I'm sorry you going through all this. Please don't let any one or yourself think "you are not good", what happened to you in the past was not your choice, whoever did that to you is "low life", not you. Your husband married you for who you are (not your past), and if he not treasure it then it is his loss. I hope you and him can work it out. No matter what, please be strong for your baby.

 

[littleone1993]

I really hope we can. I have no idea what to say to him. I cant even look at him at the moment.

 

[knobby]

I'm sorry to hear what you're going through littleone. Just know that you are not less deserving of a good relationship because of what has happened to you in the past. If you don't cheat, then you don't deserve to be cheated on period.

 

[littlejune]

I'm so sorry you're going through this @littleone! I honestly cannot imagine. However, I do understand the 'damaged goods' notion. I was raped at 16 so I get it. I still have feelings of dirtiness from time to time. I wish I had advice other than to possibly take some time to yourself to evaluate. Go somewhere that you can clear your head and not be around him, to see how you really feel and what seems right for your family.

 

[knobby]

15 week bump:

https://i62.tinypic.com/29wmk9g.jpg

Last week I'd wake up with almost a flat stomach and my bump would appear as soon as I had a bowl of cereal. This week I've been waking up with a bump And I've noticed my belly is bigger at the top as well.

 

[babifever]

Littleone, first and far most your not damaged goods. There's someone for everyone. And we all have went thru things that we are not proud of, or simply embarrassed by, or things by no fault of our on. And too add, who we are in a relationship with does not measure our worth. I know everything that I am saying sounds good and it easier said then done. But it's the truth. Now you have to work on believing it! You are worth better treatment than cheating. But again you have to believe that too. Be strong for you children, and don't forget dad can still be apart of their lives, even if you guys are not together. Your happiness and your children's happiness is most important. If you are not happy with what he's doing, than please start making preparations to get out of that situation. I wish you the best. It's never too late for a good relationship, so don't ever feel you won't find that. I for one am loving proof. Luv

 

[aries_22043]

knobby - what a cute bump you have. Congrat

 

[YikesBaby]

Littleone - I am so sorry you are going through this.

You are awesome, and don't let anyone (including yourself) make you think otherwise!!! Personally, I would NEVER let a man who doesn't recognize my value stay in my life. That doesn't mean that he can't be a part of baby's life... but doing best for baby, in my opinion, means making sure both parents are happy and respected, and setting an example for baby. I wouldn't want to teach my daughter that it's okay for a man to treat her that way.

I am sure there is far more to the story and I don't want to sound rude... I just want you to remember a) that you deserve a man who loves you for you and b) doing right for baby may not always be the easiest thing to do.

HUGE hugs!!! And remember, this too shall pass...

 

[xLaura]

Little one - sorry you are going through this again. You are stronger than you think, so don't think you need to stay with him. My only advice is to sit down and have a serious convo as to why he's doing this again. Ask him weather he wants to be with you, because he can't have both worlds. I think it's very selfish of him to do this again especially when your pregnant, but you need to stand up to him and tell him this behaviour is unacceptable.

I hope you manage to work things out together (if that's what you both want) or seperetly if that's what you choose, were always here for a shoulder to cry on if that's what you need.

 

[littleone1993]

He knows how I feel about the situation.
I'd tell him to go back to his family for a few days but i'd be terrified he'd go back to her. His mum was disgusted last time and it almost tore their family apart because they blamed themselves for how they'd brought him up.

I don't know what to do. For me it would be better to move on and make sure he gets to look after his baby. I can't keep doing this because ill grow to hate him and I don't want it to be so strained for the child.

He seems to have just disconnected from everything.
We'll sit and talk tonight but I'm not hopeful. I'm sick of fighting an upward battle.

 

[carebear1981]

Littleone - I'm so sorry you are going through that. Its awful. I was cheated on before too and I forgave him only for him to do it again. And I left him and it was the best for me because now I have an amazing husband who absolutely adores me. I know your situation is different with a little one on the way but like everyone said you deserve to be happy and with someone who will love only you. It is best for you and baby to be out of an unhappy situation.
I know it's scary and I hope you have a lot of family support. I have two friends who have sole custody of their kids (who are now 6 and almost 8) and they've grown up happy and secure because of family support. Now their fathers gave up the rights so that's different too but just know you can do this on your own.

 

[melewen]

Littleone I'm so so sorry you're going through this hon

I'll echo what everyone else said: you are NOT damaged goods! You are amazing and strong and the men in your life have absolutely no reflection on your worth. Your self worth maybe! But not *your* value. I'm actually picking up my cousin from the airport today and her first marriage was so abusive she nearly died the last time before he was arrested. He can't leave the state of Vermont now.. But her husband now (my actual cousin) is like literally the perfect husband, sweetest and funniest guy you'll ever meet (I always say to DH, "wwjd?!" since my cousins name starts with a J.. Hahah I'm sure dh loves it). Her story is just her story and it makes her strong (as it made you strong) but it in no way damaged her.

What I'm trying to say is you can and will meet someone who treats you as you deserve but I feel like this guy.. Obviously he's already done it "again" and there's no reason out there that he won't continue to. of course I can't try to tell you what to do at all but just because you aren't together doesn't mean he can't be close with his child. It's probably better to have a happy mum separated from their dad than to have two married parents and see mum hurt and upset all the time. I know you love him and that's what makes this hard but I feel almost quite defensive of you and I don't want him to continue to hurt you!

I hope you work it out

 

[MamaBunny2]

Oh littleone I wish I could give you a huge hug There is NOTHING wrong with you... it's HIM. Don't let him make you feel that way. I was cheated on while pregnant with my son. Don't settle for less than you deserve, you are so better than that! I agree with so much of previous posts. My heart hurts for you and I hope you figure something out soon.

 

[littleone1993]

Hi all,

Feeling a little better today. DH is going to take some time to realise what he wants. He says its me but he doesn't know where he fits in now with the baby because it seems to 'control our lives'.
Yet im doing everything I possibly can to avoid that. I'm still going on our weekly pub trips even though I can't drink and it makes me feel physically ill to smell alcohol but I know it makes him happy.

I hope he decides to sort his act out but I'm not convinced. He was the one that wanted us to try the first time and he was the one who wanted us to try straight after losing our last baby yet now it seems to be all my fault...

However I've been thinking about baby names all day. I'm in love!

 

[littleone1993]

How is everyone getting on?

My bump seems to have just gone pop!

 

[carebear1981]

Doing ok here. Had a horrible stomach bug on friday and couldn't keep any food down but it only lasted 24-hrs. Yay. I was 12 weeks yesterday.
Congrats on being 13 weeks littleone!!

 

[Tristansmom]

I'm super relieved, had a dr appt a couple days ago and they found the heartbeat! best feeling ever.

 

[melewen]

Awesome Tristansmom!! So exciting!!

We scheduled our anatomy scan for 20 weeks but just realized that's the week of my cousins wedding out of town and I don't want to wait for our reveal any longer! We'll be having a party the weekend of the scan. We just scheduled them basically two months out from my last appointment, which was a week later than planned due to weather. Do you think they would bump it up for me? To like.. 18-19 weeks?

 

[knobby]

Awesome Tristansmom!! So exciting!!

We scheduled our anatomy scan for 20 weeks but just realized that's the week of my cousins wedding out of town and I don't want to wait for our reveal any longer! We'll be having a party the weekend of the scan. We just scheduled them basically two months out from my last appointment, which was a week later than planned due to weather. Do you think they would bump it up for me? To like.. 18-19 weeks?

My anatomy scan is scheduled for 18w4d, so I'm sure you can be bumped up no problem

How is everyone getting on?

My bump seems to have just gone pop!

Mine popped at 13 weeks too

 

[littleone1993]

I'm so hungry all the time!

Happy Mother's Day to you all... (Its mothers day in the UK!!!)