35+ TTC 1st Graduates!!! Come on Over!

[newmarriedgal]

Hi Ladies!

I'm so bad with keeping up here!

Skye - i love the bump pics! You are so lovely! I haven't gained any weight yet - struggling to put back on the 2 lbs I have lost due to the MS but I can't wait for my bump!

Lava - we are getting stronger and further each day but man, this IS dragging! being on the 2nd trimester (in another month ugh!).

AFM - I lost my job yesterday. I was a contractor doing software support engineering and had a great job where I could work from home and now I have to figure out what to do. I would love to be a stay at home mom but not sure if that is an option for us. Some soul-searching needs to be done.......

hugs to you all...

beth

 

[Lucy1973]

Congrats on great scan Skye and your pics are so cute, what a sweet little bump....just you wait lol

MA, you will be anxious, it's totally normal, I was too, don't think I slept for weeks I was hovering over Tilly all the time, but as time goes on you begin to chill out a little more each day, as you realise your baby is getting plumper and developing well as I am sure you will see when little Amelia makes her appearance.

Beth hi sorry you lost your job. Time goes slowest in 1st tri then really speeds up!

Hi to Sunshine, codegirl, Viv, Pablo, lava and everyone else!

I have started to meet other mums, had coffee twice this week with nice mums, it's nice to get out and about and have some adult conversation... Weighed Tilly myself so don't know how accurate, but she is about 12 and a half pounds now.....big girl!

 

[pablo797]

morning all!

ma, you are not neurotic, just concerned. We all are.

Austin, thanks for the band advice! Love the description of the bumpers, they sound beautiful!!

Skye, love the bump pictures!! You look so cute!!

Lava, I know it's hard to take one day at a time and look ahead at the things that need to be done. It's a balancing act. Just remember it will all work out. One way or another.

Rottpaw, thanks for all the swaddle advice. It's pretty much what I've heard. Except for the Halo, I will have to check that out. I do think many babies escape the swaddle in the night. My girlfriend who has a 4 month old calls her houdini as she gets out of so many swaddles.

Codegirl, good luck with the adjustments! So glad DH is such a big help. I can only hope mine steps up to the plate.

Sunshine, good to hear from you. Good luck on the scan today,what fun!

NMG, so sorry about the job! That sucks. What bad timming. Best of luck with the soul searching.

Lucy, glad you are meeting other mums. I think that's really important.

AFM, well for the first time I think I over did it. Went for a hike with girlfriends this am and now feel pretty crappy. Mostly it's pain in my pelvic floor and hips. I love the walks, but think I need to cut down the pace and maybe the distance. Didn't help my fur kid took himself for a detour so I had to back track to find him. Other than that nothing new to report. Can't believe we're in the final stretch. We haven't even sarted our birthing classes, they start next week. Hope everyone has a good hump day! Anna

 

[pablo797]

quick BTW, if anyone is concerned on the "how to" front of the swaddle, there are some great demos on You Tube.

 

[MissMuffet08]

Hi all. I was waaaay tired yesterday so i did not log on. A few things re: swaddle, blankets, etc.

In the nicu they would swaddle the babies with their arms up not down/mummified. They claimed it was better for baby. Katelyn would ALWAYS break free of.her swaddle.so her arms were.free. so she now gets.swaddled.with her arms out and has so since i brought her home. She is able to.move.around in the swaddle sheuses.her stomach muscles and lifts her legs to kinda spin or go on somewhat on her side.

My MIL bought this sleep positioner thing that elevates head and chest.slightly but holds the body in place. She loves sleeping on that. I will put blankets on her only up to her chest whem she sleeps on the positioner. I asked the drs in the nicu.and.her ped and they said as long as it.only comes.up to her chest.

Currently she is still in a bassimet right mext to my bed. The.main reason i use the blanket is because it gets hot.in our bedroom so we have the.ceiling fan on and as the night goes on i dont want her to.be too cold. Also i can remove the.blanket if she gets too hot. I read the over heating can cause SIDs too.

Once i move her to her own room i will he using the sleep blankets. Because she was a preemie they were just too big for her. As for the swaddle velcro blankets. We use those as well (dh doesnt like it as it is confusimg to get her in) but i stilll keep.her arms out (she likes to have her hands by her face or.stretched out on the.sides of her head)

I will also be getting the matress wedge (goes under.the.mattress.on the springs) to keep.her.slighy elevated due to her.reflux

 

[MissMuffet08]

Hi all. I was waaaay tired yesterday so i did not log on. A few things re: swaddle, blankets, etc.

In the nicu they would swaddle the babies with their arms up not down/mummified. They claimed it was better for baby. Katelyn would ALWAYS break free of.her swaddle.so her arms were.free. so she now gets.swaddled.with her arms out and has so since i brought her home. She is able to.move.around in the swaddle sheuses.her stomach muscles and lifts her legs to kinda spin or go on somewhat on her side.

My MIL bought this sleep positioner thing that elevates head and chest.slightly but holds the body in place. She loves sleeping on that. I will put blankets on her only up to her chest whem she sleeps on the positioner. I asked the drs in the nicu.and.her ped and they said as long as it.only comes.up to her chest.

Currently she is still in a bassimet right mext to my bed. The.main reason i use the blanket is because it gets hot.in our bedroom so we have the.ceiling fan on and as the night goes on i dont want her to.be too cold. Also i can remove the.blanket if she gets too hot. I read the over heating can cause SIDs too.

Once i move her to her own room i will he using the sleep blankets. Because she was a preemie they were just too big for her. As for the swaddle velcro blankets. We use those as well (dh doesnt like it as it is confusimg to get her in) but i stilll keep.her arms out (she likes to have her hands by her face or.stretched out on the.sides of her head)

I will also be getting the matress wedge (goes under.the.mattress.on the springs) to keep.her.slighy elevated due to her.reflux

 

[MissMuffet08]

Sorry for the double post and the typos. Typing from my phone.

 

[Mommy's Angel]

Hi ladies! Thanks for the encouragement!

NMG, being a SAHM or homemaker is wonderful. It DOES take some reworking with the financial aspect but we started 5 years ago when my husband was going to school full time, interning full time and working full time. It was horrifying schedule wise for him and he'd lost weight. He decided he wanted me to come home. It was SCARY because I quit my nice paying job that I worked double time and we had to work out his 9.00 an hour job which took us down quite a bit in take-home. I look back on that and see where God performed miracles! In all actuality there was NOTHING keeping us from living in a cardboard box at the time but we always seemed to have enough. I learned to cut coupons, I mailed manufacturer's of products we bought most and asked for money saving coupons. We reworked our budget, etc. That season in our lives helped us for the season we're in when we have more.

If you cut the luxuries your used to and create a budget you CAN make it on one income. We decided that me being home was more valuable than having me work so I stayed home as homemaker and cooked, cleaned, was there everytime he got in the door, was able to learn how to stretch things by making things from scratch and had more time to give back to our church and community. While being a homemaker or SAHM isn't for everyone it CAN be worked out. It just depends on the lifestyle and what you can afford to cut back on. I WILL tell you that it's SO worthwhile. My husband during his stressful time in school came home with a smile on his face when he got in the door. I think it brought us together because both our schedules used to be CRAZY. I'd imagine it will be just as much of a blessing being a SAHM when Amelia comes.

So while I'm sorry you lost your job, I pray you find peace with whatever decision you make. I'm sure you'd make a LOVELY SAHM if that's what you decide.

Anna, goodness! Take it easy little momma. I pray you feel better soon.

As for me, I'm taking a HUGE chance and decided I'd attend my cousins wedding. She's getting married in our hometown about 40 minutes away. THEN the reception is in a castle another hour away. All that travel and sitting up straight on hard pews could put some extra pressure on the cervix and I'd be around 32 wks. 2 wks before my own shower. Thing is, I'm very proud of my cousin. Her ex from Italy came here and she found him in bed with another woman. Just heartbreaking as they were together LONG before Doug and I got married 10 years ago. She found herself wondering if he did it for a green card or if he really loved her. She's since found a new love and he's just the right guy for her. I'm proud of the crap she pushed through and would like to be there to celebrate with her. It helps that their having Filet Mignon and Lobster Tail.

I'll check with my Perinatologist on Friday and see what they say. "hopefully" I won't be pushing myself into preterm. At least if it happens Amelia will be safe, but I'd rather her NOT be in NICU for the long haul.

 

[newmarriedgal]

We decided that me being home was more valuable than having me work so I stayed home as homemaker and cooked, cleaned, was there everytime he got in the door, was able to learn how to stretch things by making things from scratch and had more time to give back to our church and community.

MA - that line made me cry. I do want to be there everytime he walks in the door and make him happy! I know in my heart I would love to be a SAHM, but honestly I am afraid because DH was married before for a long time to a woman who never worked and never has a desire to work (don't get me started on the sky-high alimony!) and I'm afraid he will see me like another her. I KNOW that is crazy, my best friend tells me I'm crazy, DH tells me I'm crazy as he would never ever compare the two of us, but it's one of those crazy twists my mind takes that I can't help. I am quite prepared to live on a tighter budget, I can quite happily give up things if I can stay at home with the baby (hopefully babies in years to come). I looked over the finances today and I think with some juggling, it can be done. I just have to have the difficult talk with Charlie and get out some fears about perception and my proposed budget.

thank you for your view point, I really appreciate a glimpse into your wonderful loving life.

 

[AustinGurrl]

Good info on all the swaddle, blanket, etc!!! Thanks, ladies!

Anna - Sorry you aren't feeling well!! I bet you are a hard gal to slow down! Hope you feel better and remember to take it easy! Can't believe you are 32 weeks! yay!

NMG/Beth - So sorry to hear about the job... timing sucks! It will work out... Sounds like you have a ton of great experience! I am on pins & needles this week too, our state agency was ordered by the governor to cut the budget by 40%... RIFs are this week. I am pretty low hanging fruit, working from home... If it happens to me, I will be filing for unemployment... I have paid my share and then some for that privilege.... just a thought... Good luck!

Sunshine - Hi girl! Can't wait to see those pictures!!!

Viv - Only a few more weeks!!! Looking forward to those nursery pictures!

Rebekah - You should def plan on the wedding! If you end up not feeling up to it, everyone will understand! Bet you will be there with bells on! Glad to hear you are feeling good!

Lava - How funny... I left private practice 2 years ago after a long career in civil litigation and started working for our state education agency... My committment to public service, if you will... When DH & I married, it allowed me to change the focus of my career. I actually enjoy it and don't miss the 80 hour weeks, etc... but do miss the $$ sometime. Oh well. And now, being new to the agency, I am at risk. Oh well (again). I think you are very smart to plan for the future & child care, etc.. Can't remember if you are like us and no family in the area... Again, I know I keep talking about it, but the Mothers Of Multiples group here has been the best resource for input on care... Not having to go through an agency for a nanny can save a bundle, as well as give you room to negotiate! You are doing great!!!

AFM - no news is good news!!! I have found a new obsession.... POPSICLES!!! Love them! I have probably had 6 in the last 2 days... fruit kinds, the red, white & blue kind... awesome! I probably had not had a popsicle in 10 years!!! Cold, sweet & not too many calories!!!

Hope you are all well... Just want to say thank you to you all for being part of this board... Not having anyone around all day is kinda hard & logging in here and "chatting" is a great break!!!
Charmaine

 

[AustinGurrl]

PS - WHEN will these babies get to be something other than a yucky old eggplant???

 

[Mommy's Angel]

NMG, I can TOTALLY understand your hesitance. Just don't limit yourself dear. You are NOT the ex. You have a different personality and your husband married you for a reason. One would hope the work ethic isn't the only reason. If you decide with your husband that being a SAHM is what you both want and will work for your lifestyle, I'd go for it.

Look, just because your a SAHM doesn't mean you can't work from home. There are PLENTY of mommies who have created websites and have their own businesses that cater around THEY'RE family time! Some women do product reviews and not only get awesome products, but money for their time as well. Others are crafty and sell stuff on Etsy.com while there are other mommies I know who have been long time SAHM's who have created websites for new SAHM's with classes like homemaking skills, from scratch cooking, etc.

Use your imagination and I bet you could come up with a business of your own based on your skills. Just because your a SAHM doesn't mean you won't be busy and honestly you'll find your work is never done. I'm sure he'll reap the benefits too with more quality time with you, a good meal on the table, clean house and clothes (NOT that this didn't happen while you were at work of course, but you'll at least be able to slow down a bit).

There are SO many opportunities for you to thrive and grow as a homemaker so don't let the ex-factor keep you from making the decision. As I've said, not everyone wants to do this and it's OKAY...but for those that DO...I'm always here to encourage the first few steps because it IS scary moving to only one income. It CAN be done!

It sounds like your husband is pretty supportive and loves YOU for who YOU are. If you both decide it's what you want, try it for a year and see how it goes. Work is ALWAYS out there.

In the meantime, good luck with your soul searching and decision-making. I have no doubt whatever decision you make will be right for you and YOUR family!

Charmaine, your too cute for words! I'm glad your here too. You keep me entertained with the triplet updates!



Okay mommies who use RockinGreen Cloth Diaper Detergent. Which kind do you use for washing the diapers?! I have NO idea which to buy and what the difference is?

 

[AustinGurrl]

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Yaaay managed ) Here's how chubby I am xxx

Skye - You are just the CUTEST thing ever!!! Way to Rock your Bump, Girl!!!

 

[AustinGurrl]

PS - WHEN will these babies get to be something other than a yucky old eggplant???

YeeHaw!!! We are now Squash!!! And 29 weeks!!

Trying to get into the office today... Hope everyone has a good Thursday!!!

 

[pablo797]

Morning all!!

austin, know just what you mean! This is the favorite part of my day, chatting with you ladies and getting caught up on all that's going on. Yes you are a squash!! Congrads on moving up the food chain.

MA, I say go to the wedding too. You can always leave early if you don't feel well. Just stay off the dance floor. So sorry about your cousin and all she went through, what a pig of a man. So happy that there is a happy ending.

Missmuffet, thanks for the swaddle info. Always good to get the full picture. How are you doing? How's the sleep thing?

AFM, well I went home early yesterday and iced my hips and took a nap. I told my boss that I was cutting down to four days a week after next weeek and they were very supportive. And . . . Drum roll . . . I got the promotion! I feel bad saying that as some have recently lost jobs and/ or are concerned about losing jobs. But I am really excited. When I talked to the owner of the company he asked me how long I was going to take off, I said I hoped to take 12 weeks,but would work with them. He said NO, take the time to be with your baby, it will be hard enough to come back to work as it is. So great support system!! Only damper is DH, he didn't even say congratulations. When he asked the pay increase and I told him he was less than thrilled. I was like, hey at least I got a pay increase, I could not have gotten the promotion at all. Just rained on my parade a little.

So that's all i've got. Hope everyone has a good day, it's almost Friday!!! Anna

 

[lavalux]

Way to go, Pablo!! That is such great news. You take the time to really savor it. I haven't had any pay raise u. Years b/c I work for the state & there have been budget cuts/furloughs in the past. Any increase is wonderful. Maybe if you tell your husband how much this means to you & how you really want to celebrate with him, he'll get his head in the right place!

Austin,
You sound like you have an awesome job too. I was in private practice before & miss the $$$, but there is no way to put a value on life/work balance!

 

[pablo797]

thanks Lava, your right about talking to DH, I just wish he were one of those men who knew that a celebratory dinner or flowers would have been appropriate. When is going to learn to read my mind!

 

[newmarriedgal]

Hi Ladies!

Pablo - wonderful news! congrats to you!! I know I've been sad as I just lost my job, but that doesn't mean I can't be happy for someone elses good fortune!

I'm at peace with my layoff (didn't take me long!), one of the higher-ups called me and told me he was sad they lost me and that they lost 35 people and it was strictly a business financial reason and one he did not make. I told him that I harbored no ill-feelings and if the business turns around and they need someone, to please contact me and I would be happy to come back. I think he genuinely appreciated it and asked me to keep him and the group updated on the baby bump! So I'm at peace, happy, and made some decisions with Charlie last night over his bday dinner: I will be a SAHM, but I will take some time for myself and learn fully the product I was going to support at the job on my own time and get certified, so I can be a consultant for a parttime basis later on in life if I so choose (maybe even at this same job, who knows!).

SO onto the next chapter of my life.....looking forward to it! bring on week 8!

 

[Mommy's Angel]

WTG Anna! You had that in the works for awhile now. How exciting that they finally offered you the job and will work around you and baby. Sounds like you have a pretty nice work environment. One that not everybody has. WTG!

NMG, so glad you have closure and now a focus. NOW you can relax and enjoy your pregnancy.

AFM: Met with the Doula today. I've been having anxiety and depression lately and yet again the anxiety crept up... I didn't feel like company but pushed through it and it was just a lovely time! Tomorrow is my sonogram and appointment with the perinatologist where I plan to ask quite a few questions pertaining to the injections for Amelia's lungs. Right now I'm not really seeing a need for them, but since there is no guarantee when she'll actually be here and how soon, it may be worth getting.

Didn't get any sleep last night and yet another night with acid reflux where I took the prescription they gave me. JUST start to sleep at 830am this morning when our pekingese jumps on the bed next to Doug and hurls. That did it....I went off my rocker and flipped a switch. Poor thing didn't mean it but with no sleep, acid reflux and anxiety...I was NOT myself. Doug jumped out of bed, we had to take the king comforters and linens to a laundry mat that has a large capacity loader and spent most of the morning there. Came home to find two idiots we know were talking trash about something. There's no talking to people who are like these idiots so I just kept to myself even though I wanted to throw glass.

Had a nap after lunch and the day got MUCH better. I guess I'm coughing this morning as pregnancy mood swings. WATCH OUT!

Have a good night everyone!

 

[rottpaw]

Hey girls on vacay a couple days but will catch up properly when I return. Hugs all around!