JoHio
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Jun 12, 2011
- Messages
- 624
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I think it is vital as women to be KIND and supportive of one another.
This rant has been inspired by another thread, but I did not want to respond to it there since this is something I have thought about often, and don't want to come across as over-reacting to (admittedly) only one person's response.
Here it goes...
Becoming pregnant does not *PRESTO* make us infallible. We are still individuals, with strong impulses and desires and sometimes it is damned near impossible to fight them. Willpower is like any muscle - you can only exercise it so much before it gets tired. I'm married to an OB and I assure you, there is no such thing as perfect behavior when you're pregnant and no matter what we do, there is no way to guarantee any outcome. My hubby always tells me the best thing I can do is be a happy Mom.
Women who eat cold cuts, or have some wine or get their hands dirty in the garden are not bad people - they are human. Eating runny eggs does not mean you love your baby any less; it means that you are STILL an individual- and individual who is pregnant granted, but you still inhabit your own body and you have years and years and years of entrenched habits - many of which now we are told to automatically switch off, like pregnancy is some mythical state that makes us superhuman.
I think most pregnant women - myself included - do our very best to do what's best for our babies, and part does mean relaxing and enjoying our pregnancies. Not living in a Mommy culture of fear or God-like judgment.
I have many times sat through the whole "stay-at-home Mom" versus "working Mom" argument and it makes me similarly heartsick. I mean, really? We are all doing our best and we do what works for us, our family and our situation.
I'm sure many of you have seen or been subjected to Mommy judgement. I know I have - mostly in regards to my activity level during pregnancies. (I train pretty intensely throughout all my pregnancies). People have said the most horrid and ignorant things.
I think this forum has some of the kindest people out there - and I hope we can continue to spread the message. I guess that would make this "rant" more like a message of hope. Like preaching to the choir, since so many of you ladies are wonderful!
This rant has been inspired by another thread, but I did not want to respond to it there since this is something I have thought about often, and don't want to come across as over-reacting to (admittedly) only one person's response.
Here it goes...
Becoming pregnant does not *PRESTO* make us infallible. We are still individuals, with strong impulses and desires and sometimes it is damned near impossible to fight them. Willpower is like any muscle - you can only exercise it so much before it gets tired. I'm married to an OB and I assure you, there is no such thing as perfect behavior when you're pregnant and no matter what we do, there is no way to guarantee any outcome. My hubby always tells me the best thing I can do is be a happy Mom.
Women who eat cold cuts, or have some wine or get their hands dirty in the garden are not bad people - they are human. Eating runny eggs does not mean you love your baby any less; it means that you are STILL an individual- and individual who is pregnant granted, but you still inhabit your own body and you have years and years and years of entrenched habits - many of which now we are told to automatically switch off, like pregnancy is some mythical state that makes us superhuman.
I think most pregnant women - myself included - do our very best to do what's best for our babies, and part does mean relaxing and enjoying our pregnancies. Not living in a Mommy culture of fear or God-like judgment.
I have many times sat through the whole "stay-at-home Mom" versus "working Mom" argument and it makes me similarly heartsick. I mean, really? We are all doing our best and we do what works for us, our family and our situation.
I'm sure many of you have seen or been subjected to Mommy judgement. I know I have - mostly in regards to my activity level during pregnancies. (I train pretty intensely throughout all my pregnancies). People have said the most horrid and ignorant things.
I think this forum has some of the kindest people out there - and I hope we can continue to spread the message. I guess that would make this "rant" more like a message of hope. Like preaching to the choir, since so many of you ladies are wonderful!